Pen Pal from Iran who I met on Youtube 16 years ago

[Beautifulsky]

Back around 2008-2009, I met two Iranian guys from a chatroom on Youtube. I made a comment on their videos and they replied back and from there we started talking to each other like through Youtube and Facebook. I stopped talking to them after two years after that, and I thought I was spending too much time in friendships/romantic relationships online, and that perhaps that would have been useless, or dangerous. They're about the same age as me...anyways, I never met these people in person and I did have some romantic feelings for one of the guys but I never had sex with him. We did once Skype with each other once to see what we sounded like and looked like in real time. Well, after not talking to them for over 16 years, I decided to look them up and send them a message. I thought, well, I don't have any friends now because of moving away from college back home, and all my high school friends moved away to college or started a family of their own in another state, and also my mom just passed away 2 years ago, and now coping with a new mental health diagnosis. I don't have any social connection like I use to. Anyways, I just want say here that I started to chat with this Iranian guy again on Facebook now. I see from his social media that he has a relationship with a girl, a long term girlfriend who is also Iranian, and he moved to another city away from Tehran. He is a bodybuilder and works at a gym. He has a tattoo. He has changed in those ways since I last talked to him. I want to see if talking to this old online friend will help me socialize more. I don't think we will ever meet in person, in fact, I don't think I should. So, that's something I don't want. I guess what I want is like a pen pal, someone I can write to, and learn about their culture. As another note, I have been trying to socialize with Orthodox Jewish people in my local community. There is a synagogue down the street from where I live where I can walk to if I wanted to attend service there. I learn their culture and religion too. I was introduced to a rabbi about a month after my mom died and asked this rabbi a lot of questions about death, and the afterlife since my mom passed away. He gave me the perspective of what Orthodox Jewish people believe. I sometimes also attend service where I get to hear Hebrew chants, and prayers, and also where I can also have a kosher dinner with them and also guests. I also attended bible study here where I live with a group of people I met from an app called Meetup. We're suppose to meet twice weekly to discuss the Christian Bible, but I started to take evening college classes now and the time they meet up at a restaurant interferes with my schedule so I can't go to it for right now. So, back to this Iranian guy, and wanting to still talk to him and to be a pen pal, do you think this is a good idea? I don't want to be a victim of internet abuse. People change: I know I did when I developed my mental illness and I wonder if he has too where he harbors any ill intention towards me, even though I don't know him well enough to actually know. I tried looking online for "pen pal" websites where I can speak to someone in English and also another language and learn another language and culture too. I tried to do this with a "French pen pal" since I learned French in high school, college, and also I have lived in France for 9 months. The website for that didn't really connect me to anyone: it just wanted your information and subscription ($) to be able to talk to anyone. Strangely enough after making a profile with that website, I got a spam mail afterwards about someone demanding money from me and telling me that they have my information such as my home address, email address, and first and last name and demand money from me otherwise they would harm me in anyway. Also, I have used another website called "TalkwithStrangers" and I have talked to people from other countries and the issue with this website with trying to talk to someone online to socialize and learn about them, and their background is that people just want to talk about sex, even though it's not designed for that purpose. So I stopped using that website. Also, now since I have been diagnosed with a mental illness, I have also reached out to socialize online with crisis counselors who text me and listen to me about my issues. The chat isn't for long and it's anonymous. But some of the counselors on there are judgmental and not helpful. I have also created an account here with HealthUnlocked to socialize with people with mental illness. However, I don't want my life to be about my mental illness and only communicating with those who also have a mental illness. It would be healthier for me to hear about normal things people experience in their daily lives rather than another person like me struggling with medical issues.

[LazyXrayEyes2255]

Internet I would be so careful