At a loss

[Imaginator997]

Well I have had about 19 ECT treatments and my suicidal thoughts are still there. Everyday I upsess about suicide. I get the character Morpheus in my head telling me to commit suicide, that I can be so much more when I free myself. Regardless I still upsess about suicide. I fantasize about ending my life. Everything can be going right yet I still think about suicide. I am upsessed with suicide and ending my life. (Note I am just expressing how I feel I am not in danger I am just struggling with my thoughts.)

[Hidden]

When did you have your last course of ECG, if you feel you need help contact NHS Information on Tel 111 and explain your needs there. They can arrange a Crisis Team to visit you. Also they can if required arrange for you to be taken into Hospital.

Try and call your GP tomorrow if that will help, especially if you are in Crisis.

How can we help

BOB

[Hidden]

You need to take small steps to put your life back into perspective - YOU matter and looking after yourself - should be your first priority ENJOY life - do things you enjoy and try to calm down and relax with google mindful meditation youtube

[Hidden]

:Have some goals and work towards this, day by day improve

[pandaeyes1]

That sounds awful. I’m sorry you have such difficulty. Do you think there’s a component of obsessive compulsiveness to these thoughts?

[Ddorne]

I was thinking OCD also. It reminds me of my own intrusive thoughts. We want certainty and keep going over the same thought. Do you have any OCD? One day at a time. LD

[Hidden]

You need to try and move on.

If you keep thinking about your death, suicide these thoughts can become a habit, and sometimes get comfort from those feeling, you say you have no intention of taking your life given that not discussing this negative thoughts may help you move on. Why do you not say I want to live, enjoy my life. Then you can consider taking your thoughts on a positive journey., Of positive thoughts and happy expectations. You need to move on and if you are taking medications stay with them, these hopefully help you move on from your voices

BOB