When people insult you : What can you... - Mental Health Sup...

Mental Health Support

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When people insult you

Kittykatxxxxx profile image

What can you do when people insult you , but you are struggling badly . I am unemployed and live at home. I seem to be fair game for comments from strangers . I suffer with depression / anxiety and have had many lows. They say things like ‘Still living at home then , no job? What are you doing ?’ Or ‘you have no career , why did you choose that job ‘.

People just think I’m lazy/ useless. I feel so sad they say these horrible things .

9 Replies

Ignore them, let there comments pass over your head. They don't know enough about your situation to understand, and if they did they don't have the right to pass judgement anyway.

Voluntary work? Charity work? - could help

I suffered insults from all my family from ten years old through to the present day, I was medically retired thirty years ago and it just got worse. Personally If it is going on now it will become a habit and will extend through life. So you have options , that only you can decide on a way forward for yourself. My parents knew the people I worked with, so it extended into Employment. My Mother died early this year and I moved away four years ago. they put a search on me, found me and the problems are now going on again

Live in a different County or State, it is harder to find you. However living in the same county it is that much easier to place that pin and find you

What you are possibly suffering from may be unemployment, You can get a new position.

Personally that would make no difference now. Get out and live your life the way you wish.

I feel sorry you are going through what is happening. My Parents were not even honest where I was born, my Wife let it slip yesterday The only thing was I was born in a Northumberland Market town, Not the city. It seems a great deal of fibs have been told

BOB

Ask them for a job?!

Consider Joining up with a Mental Health Day Centre, when stronger consider your options and follow them.

Look for work that is not generally what you want, getting a job while in a job is easier, it shows a willing to try different things. The Voluntary Centre is one way that is a positive move, again this shows determination and some understanding of peoples needs. Eventually you may be taken on by the centre you are attending.

Contact Agencies and the Job Centres in your area, you may not feel find what you have been offered is any good, although again you are proving a willingness. The NHS has various agencies, including Think Tanks, they give assistance to patients and department needs, give it a try.. Something like this may help you gain confidence and a further skill.

BOB

Oh tell me about it. I lived in London for many years and as an office worker was never out of a job. However when I moved to a seaside town there was very little little work and most of it semi skilled or manual. I did manage to get office work, much of it temporary, but because I suffer from back problems couldn't do most of the other work available though I did try.

These are the types of remarks I got constantly -

"There is plenty of work available if you want it' often accompanied by suggestions or opening the paper (even my father would do this). I said OK there is a chefs job here, or how the accountants one. No wait there is a part time office job but it would take 2 hours to get there by bus and 2 hours back and most required a car.

"Friends' would say they want staff in this shop or there are loads of care jobs. When I reminded them of my back problems I would get 'I have that too and I did it even though I was in agony!' Well I physically couldn't as I get severe pain unless I can sit down some of the time.

One 'friend' looked at me and said 'Omg my taxes'. I snapped back with 'No my taxes from working all my life and paying for everyone else's kids like yours as well'

Unfortunately others will always judge so either try or ignore it or come up with some good replies x

Small business - selling shoes children - my friend brought three houses doing this - of course you need a partner/family member helping you

I saw on the cookery programme, they became millionaire for making fruit cakes and selling jam, all kinds

Hi Kittykat , Whenever rude people ask me questions that are none of their business I never answer the question. Instead I ask them … why are you asking? It lets them know the question is not appropriate. Sometimes I will answer by saying ….that's not something I talk about with anyone but family. If you feel these answers are too blunt you can always follow up by thanking them for asking ,or for their interest. Pam

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