Feeling Like a Loser

[maskedjinn]

The fact that someone was saying racist things to me and my family while we were out and I couldn't say anything to them to defend myself because of social anxiety makes me feel ashamed, I should have said something but I didn't cause I couldn't. I'm such a loser I can't even defend myself.

[ovi88]

Hi. I'm sorry you had to go through that, but you're not a loser. A narrow-minded racist is a loser. People who live with bias and prejudice and hate all their lives are losers because they do not have the ability to open their minds and let their brain breath a little.

And I always say that these people should be ignored 24/7. There is no point in arguing with them, it only encourages them. You did right by not saying anything. You can act like they're invisible or even pretend you don't understand what they are saying. Just SMILE at them cuz after all that's what you should do when you see morons. They are to be pitied.

[hypercat54 in reply to ovi88]

Totally agree. x

[maskedjinn in reply to ovi88]

Thank you

[Hidden]

You are not alone most people with mental health concerns prefer not to stand up for themselves, we can become to cautious and we have those feelings where we are unable to relate or understand anyone with any different ideas to our own. We lack confidence and this can just make matters worse for ourselves and others around us.

It can also become a problem to relate to our own needs and expectations, we then become our worse enemy. The only way forward is to understand and gain confidence when talking to others and be able to explain how you feel to those who are unable to be broad minded enough to listen and be understanding of others, including you.

All you can be is firm with others who prefer to be lacking in understanding. your expectations and you need to be able to expect a positive level of respect. Whatever your Race or colour we are generally all the same and everyone needs to accept and move on from those negative peoples

BOB

[maskedjinn in reply to Hidden]

Thank you for the advice

[sweetiepye]

First of all, I am sorry that you have to experience that kind of prejudice . People like that are so hateful and ignorant. I doubt if anything you could say would make a difference. Put yourself at a higher level and ignore them. I know how frustrating it must be to hear these things and not be able to respond , but these people condemn themselves when they open their mouths. Pam

[maskedjinn in reply to sweetiepye]

Thank you for the response

[kenster1]

hi shocking that folk can be cruel just because of colour in my eyes you showed you are better than them by walking away even if you wanted to say something.

[maskedjinn in reply to kenster1]

Thank you for your response

[sweetiepye in reply to kenster1]

kenster, you always have a reasonable response. Pam

[Gambit62]

The behaviour of the other person was actually criminal but if there weren't witnesses willing to come forward and you don't actually know the person concerned it will be difficult to report.

It is unlikely that defending yourself would have helped the situation at all - it could well have made it worse. Walking away was the right thing to do.

[maskedjinn in reply to Gambit62]

Thank you

[MsTree]

You're not a loser. You never know what saying something to ignorant, stupid people can lead to. They were obviously trying to provoke you and I say you're the bigger person for not wasting your precious breath on them.

[maskedjinn in reply to MsTree]

Thank you

[Humanintraining]

Not paying attention to racists is the best course of action. Not acting smug, superior, or talking back. That brings you to their level. You act in the same way as if a stranger just farted in your presense : You're both very well aware there's a stench in the room but you choose not to show it. You've got the appropriate reaction down. Now you just have to realise it's the best thing you could have done given the circumstances.

It's okay to not verbally defend yourself, you shouldn't have to in the first place.

Don't care so much. If anything it means the racist is winning. All he wants is to hurt.

[maskedjinn in reply to Humanintraining]

Thank you

[Hidden]

I know this post is old but it makes me sad to read this. Everybody is beautiful in their own way. I grew up having kids laugh at me because I wore hearing aids at a young age and all thru high school. It was embarrassing. Because of my experience I knew I never wanted to be like any of those kind of people. I talk to people that are going thru the same situations and try to keep in contact with them. With today's society we need each other more than ever.