Hi everyone, I need some advice. I have anorexia and depression and since my diagnosis, my dad has rebuked me on "getting fat", ordering food for me and telling me to shut up and eat it when I get upset, when I broke my foot 3 months ago (which has pulled into the deepest depression) telling me it's my fault for f***king up my summer and smirking when I told him that I sometimes want to die. From getting CBT since my diagnosis, I have identified that my dad has played a massive part in how I see/feel about myself. He has treated my mum and brothers in exactly the same vein however, they find it difficult to understand why I get so upset as that's "just dad". Since he smirked about me feeling suicidal I haven't spoken to him (2 months ago).
Tomorrow evening, our family friend is coming over for dinner to say farewell to my brother and I who are on the verge of moving. I have told my mum and brothers that I don't want my dad to be apart of our evening but they have ardently stated that we are a family and have to come across that way.
I am finding it really hard to understand that how we are 'supposed' to be seen is more important than to what is happening behind closed doors. My mum and brothers all know dad is in the wrong but believe nothing can be done. My mum has stated that she should have divorced him but she missed her chance.
I feel so sad and frustrated that my family accept dads behaviour and I need some advice on how I go about tomorrow. I never ever want to be civil to a man who has treated me so badly but I don't want to be seen as upset/angry in front of our family friend when dad is there and everyone else is still playing their part in the family who we are seen to be...what shall I do?