Mental Health Support
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How did this happen?

I can't do this anymore. I can't take this anymore. I've tried to get better but I pretty sure I'm never gonna get better. Im just 20 and my life is already a chaos. My friends don't care about me, my family doesn't give a damn about me. How did this happen? I can't afford to get any help.. I have a job but I have to give my Dad more than half of my salary because he can't afford the rent by himself. With the money I have left I can't even buy my own damn cosmetics. I'd get a better job if I could finish my studies, but there's no one who can pay my fee... My Mother doesn't talk to me and god knows why. I've tried to talking to but she never responds. My Dad works so hard everyday that I don't even get to see him most days. My sisters treat me like shit, probably because they think I'm a failure. My brothers doesn't even know I exist. My friends don't care about me a lot.. they don't like the fact I don't talk much. But I've got anxiety which makes it hard for me to talk to people...

There are days I want to end it. Just be free. No more worries. But I have hope. I want to be happy. I want to be content. I want good friends. I want a person who makes me feel the best on my bad days.. I want a family. But I don't know how.. I don't know what to do to find that. I just need a little help. I want to get better. Please.

2 Replies

Hello Let_123 you seem to have taken on a problem that isn't yours to deal with and that to me appears to be the thing that is stopping you move forward. I'm talking about the rent you pay your father. I had to leave home when I was 16 and live in a hostel because my mum didn't t want me living at home, I expect I was a failure in her eyes. I coped on poor pay, even managed to get home odd times for a couple of nights. At 18 and I decided it was time to move on, get a career and I got a job with accomadation included and gained a life long friend who I am still in touch with 40 years on. So the reason I'm mentioning this is, try and take one day at a time and do some planning. Is there another relative or a friend you could lodge with ? Your Fathers problems are not yours. He has to work out his own problems. Once you start making plans, things will become clearer. Two of my career jobs had accomadation included. They are out there. I do feel you will cope better leaving the past of negative people behind you. I hope this has helped in some way.


Hi Let_123, You poor thing at aged only 20 to be feeling so low in yourself and finding life so difficult at the moment. But as Rosepetal60 said, perhaps you are taking on your Dad's financial problems which in turn are stressing you out and making you feel very overburdened. Maybe a way forward to begin with, is to sit down with your Dad (when he has time off and is a bit more relaxed) and tell him how you feel. Explain that you cannot afford to give him as much towards his rent as it is leaving you with no money, so that you are unable even to plan a career for yourself. You could suggest to your Dad to make an appointment with Citizens Advice, if he is on a low income I wonder could he be entitled to some support from Housing Benefit or even to qualify for a reduction in Council Tax.? They can provide him with the necessary application forms and even help him to fill them in. It is worth your while telling your Dad how you really feel and encourage him to get help and support.

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You may also like to make an appointment to see your GP and explain how you are feeling and ask what help and support can be given to you. You really do seem that you want to feel better in yourself and that you want things to improve in your life. Try and take one step at a time and try and take each day as it comes. Perhaps there may be a support group in your area or a youth club where you could meet new friends, that may help to boost up your confidence and self esteem. Also maybe find a friend who instills positivism instead of spending too much time being around people who are more negative. Perhaps some exercise, even running might help you to start feeling better about yourself, as exercise releases endorphins which give us that feel good factor. You have taken that first step to step to improving your life and feeling better in yourself. Things can take time but often with as much determination and motivation that you have, things can slowly start to change for the better and time and patience and support for both you and your Dad are important factors to help you in your change process. Well done and take care of yourself, and good luck for your future. I am sure our other great members will support you and continue to offer their advice and friendship, so do keep posting on here to let us know how you are getting on.


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