Mental Health Support
20,549 members12,495 posts

im sortof new

I havent posted before... I have a problem with crying.

it really has messed up my life, im so scared to talk to anyone for fear of tears.

i can think clearly but the tears dont obey me, they just spurt out and betray my emotions. once i start i have a hard time stopping. There are particular trigger words that do it, I find. Like right now, typing this, i have tears. why? i wish they would just stop. If i think about frustration or embarrasment, or especially talk about it, i tear up. Of course that makes it more embarrassing. Ive tried various medications for depression and nothing stopped the tears, some made them worse. I just try to avoid talking to everybody.

its really really frustrating.

anyhow... ive been here lurking for awhile, not sure why but i felt like introducing myself now.

take care all!

8 Replies

Do you cry for specific reasons or just when thinking of your emotions?


Hi Anna_Nimity,

I have tried the technique, "fake it till you make it" in an effort not to be seen emotional through crying. Some things are so intense that you cannot stop the tears so I have decided not to try if I feel tears coming.

Emotional tears have special health benefits - contain stress hormones which get excreted from the body through crying.

Tears act as a safety valve by releasing excess stress hormones such as cortisol. If left unchecked, chronic elevated levels of these hormones can cause physical ailments and play havoc with mood. Stress often precedes a good cry, so the sense of calm often felt afterward is at least in part due to hormonal release.

So I guess the question is, what is causing your particular brand of stress? To address the issues, you should book an appointment with your doctor for an overall wellness check. You should request a referral to a psychologist for some talking therapy if your doctor does not provide it.

Keep that box of tissues handy :)


Hello, I am sure you looked into it already but I had a relative who had a similar problem and was diagnosed of IEED, ( involuntary emotional expression disorder) I believe there are appropriate treatments for it,

All the best


Hi Anna_Nimity

The other replies to your post look helpful. I hope they can give you some ways forward. Have you tried any kind of talking therapy already? All the best


Hi Anna-Nimity The community replies have got it right I reckon. Talking therapy preferably person centred would help and discover if there is a reason to cry all the way through the early sessions or to work with the emotions that make you tear up Embarrassment? Powerlessness? I would avoid medication attempting to cover up emotions at present. Sending kind thoughts...


Hello StickyPud You're right some medications can dull the emotions, which is often the reason for the prescription! As long as you recognise the emotion be it sadness, anger, disappointment etc.etc. don't worry about tears not coming. Please don't feel you should show emotion but if you feel your emotions are very dull talking may help you through too. Best wishes, love your name.


Anna_Nimity, Don't ever be embarrassed for crying! You're feeling your sadness-this is a good sign. During one point in my recovery I turned "OFF" my feelings. Wouldn't let "anyone hurt me again". So I thought, when in the long run I was just hurting myself. Crying can be healing. (I know going through it, it can be annoying) But you're in pain, and grieving. Don't worry about "other" people, they can take care of themselves! Crying is a way of taking care of "ourselves". Better days ahead.


thank you for all these kind words and good advice, I mainly have been crying about work anxiety so I have to hide it. I would like to try to turn it off. I have a meeting with a colleague I have been putting off for a long time because I am worried about crying in front of him. I wanted to work in collaboration with him but I have to accept the fact that it hasnt worked out. I didnt learn all the stuff I needed to do the analysis, and he wasnt in the position to teach me. so frustrating.

I really appreciate this support, thanks!



You may also like...