Hello, I am new here

[Tringle]

I have suffered from anxiety and depression for a number of years, as well as intermittent hearing problems. I don't have very good self-confidence, trusting my own judgement, etc.

I have a full time job. I enjoy the work but can find it difficult to deal with people, due to the above issues. I work in a close-knit team so this weakness is not well-tolerated. There is a culture of blame in my workplace too which doesn't help me with self-confidence.

I have taken time off sick at the moment as I am suffering a bout of sinusitis which is affecting my hearing. Earlier this week, before I went sick, I felt very undermined and picked on at work. This could be all in my head, I appreciate, but it is not helping. I am still dreading having to go back to work next week and it's affecting my sleep.

I saw the doctor today about my sinusitis but she didn't seem to have very much time to talk about anything else. She prescribed antibiotics to help with the sinusitis/temporary deafness and sent me on my way.

In the meantime, I have no help still with what I am feeling. There's seemingly nowhere to turn.

My partner is backing me but he cannot really help much either, other than to listen. I also fear he might start getting tired of my indecision, as will my employers.

I am also trying to break a video game addiction which has been masking all this up until now...

[DMM218]

Hello and thanks for your post. I'm not sure if you are in UK. But if so , scroll down and have a look at an earlier post from yesterday that was about the same kind of issue namely work related stress. You may find the responses helpful to you.

No one should feel belittled or demeaned by fellow workers.

Lacking in self confidence affects so many people and I've known plenty of people who are indecisive. Sometimes it's stems from self doubt.

A good way of increasing self confidence is to take up a new interest, exercise, painting, ball room dance, a new language really anything as long as you enjoy it and it brings you out of yourself a bit. Meeting new people who share your interest helps enormously as they are likely to see you in a different way than work people.

Speak to your doctor and tell him how you feel as your mental health is beginning to suffer and you really need to look after yourself.

Using this site can help broaden your mind and show you that many people feel bad about themselves. Usually for no real reason except that other people have treated them poorly in the past. That's not their fault at all.

I've read a few self help books and there is lots of stuff online about boosting your confidence. It can be done.

Have a wee look and see if there is any advice that helps. Post if you aren't sure of something as the members here are genuinely helpful and interested in other people.

I hope you get some more responses. Take care

[DMM218 in reply to DMM218]

Stressed and not happy is the post about work stress.

[Walrus61 in reply to DMM218]

DMM218 you give some great advice for Tringle as well as many with a similar feeling. I went through something similar some years ago. Work related stress, lack of confidence. I started to learn Wellness and meditation, started playing badminton again which I hadn't played for near on 20 years. Met new people and started to gain confidence. I had a mentor from outside the company who really helped me. I have studied, gained qualifications I never thought I would. When I get low now, I read, listen to crazy music sic or watch a silly film, maybe even dance madly in my apartment. All you say is true, so Tringle, we are here for you and can understand what you may be going through, use us, talk to us. You have gained a few new friends

[Tringle]

Thank you for your advice, DMM218. Funnily enough, just after posting mine, I found and read the 'Stressed And Not Happy' post - which totally related to me - and the subsequent advice from you there. Yes, I do live in the UK. I agree that no-one deserves to put up with a toxic environment at work. I will take measures to fight back, once I am again fit and well. I enjoy my actual work too much to let it go easily.

Walrus61, also thanks for your experiences and welcome. I hope to make some more friends too.

[MAS_Nurse]

Hi Triangle, Other forum members have posted some helpful suggestions. Would it be possible to speak to someone in Human Resources at the company to discuss these issues? I hope you will soon be feeling better. Best wishes.

[Tringle]

OK. Now is the evening before I go back to work and I confess I am dreading it a bit. It is not easy to pinpoint exactly where the toxicity is coming from, in order to let HR know. I will update tomorrow when I get back home. There may not be an issue tomorrow or there may be. Apparently, also it is not easy to be moved. We shall see anyhow.

[Tringle]

Well, I have been back at work for a couple of days now. Monday was ok, even though I was tired after not having much sleep. Today was a bit fraught but I survived.

I feel a bit stronger now, anyhow.