Tired and fed up

[raymond47]

Nothing ever seems to go right lately. Just want a normal week without anything disasterous happening. My anxiety levels are really high even though been swimming every morning and taking my PRN. Am trying to be strong and hold things together but feel angry and upset my best friend had an accident and is in HDU. Within space of 6 weeks my husband fractured his skull and now my best friend also really poorly. No its not their fault but I can't seem to get on top of things and am so scared I'll slip back and let them down. Its an awful feeling when poorly people are more concerned about how things are affecting you and worrying that your not okay. And of course I say I am but I'm not. No I have rambled on a bit but and I have been trying and doing what my CPN says but I feel so tired of it all and would really like to shut my eyes and that be it. Which of course is a horrid thing to say cos its very selfish to want to end my pain when my loved ones are hurting.

[Gambit62]

Don't be so hard on yourself.

Really sorry to hear about your friend and your husband.

Your reactions are all quite normal and you are managing to keep going under difficult circumstances.

I can relate to a lot of what you are saying - really stressed because I don't know how my boyfriend is and haven't heard from him for 2 days but don't have any way of getting in touch - last text mentioned angina and nothing after that. One friend that I meet up with regularly on a Friday hasn't been able to make it for a few weeks - this time it's because of assignments on an open university course and there is a lot of me feeling that if she has to put everything else on hold to get them done - which is what is happening - then not sure she's going to be able to cope with things afterwards and I really want to tell her how stressed I'm feeling but I can't because it wouldn't be fair as it would seem selfish and yet I feel a bit angry with everything.

Don't think you rambled or ranted ... but hope putting it down helped you feel a bit better. Its really difficult when you have no control over things.