Feeling low today, not quite as low as yesterday......
It's my birthday end of June. I'm not big on birthdays....although my daughter loves any celebration and loves surprises. This was no exception when it was her partners mums birthday...a lovely day at a spar was one of the gifts..I was invited but declined...I never know how I'm going to feel and I don't know her that well so decided easier to let them all go and enjoy and I was pleased for them...they had numerous birthday cakes and gifts over a couple of days, the birthday seemed never ending hahaha so much so I was beginning to get a little fed up with it...it was all a little over the top .....3 birthday cakes, 3 songs of happy birthday on seperate occasions but becoming annoying....I was glad when it was over and the lady in question went home.
..I should say I live with my daughter and her partner it all works very well quite a large house and we all get along fine..they are hardly ever here as they both work full time and socialise a lot.....
Anyway yesterday I asked my daughter what plans she had for the weekends of the next couple of months...I will cut it v short..
Her partners mum comes to stay quite a bit....and she has invited herself for my birthday, we had so far made no plans...I wondered if I was being awful, but why doesn't this woman consider I may wish to do something with my daughter alone..I DON'T want the same bloody scenario I had when she was here ....I know people would say speak to your daughter tell her etc etc....but I can't it would put my daughter in a very awkward situation and she is lovely and has done so much for me....
I would not be so inconsiderate, if I were in the same situation and I new it was her birthday I would say, 'I won't come that weekend as you may have plans with your mum' its different if after that you are invited..if we do anything now she has to come along,,she would sulk if she were left out...
I was upset about it last night, my poor daughter ends up paying out for this too, because if we go for a meal to celebrate on the day or whatever we do she will pay for her too...I hardly know her I don't want to be with her ..I feel I had no choice in it all...I don't need this crap, I find celebrations and stuff hard enough....
...I called a friend and she is away the week of my birthday and has asked if I would like to house sit...she lives right on the beach a 3 hr drive from here,,,I have agreed to go.
I don't mind spending my birthday on my own in fact I prefer it rather than be with inconsiderate people..who appear afraid to miss out on something...
...I will celebrate my birthday with my daughter the following weekend....perhaps in a nice quiet little restaurant...
I hope I am well enough to make the journey, although think I will be as I have a determination to do it....maybe that's good for me..and in fact the inconsiderate person may have helped me
Just felt the need to write this down, sometimes writing things down makes you feel better.........