Still in a slump

[Cookie2217]

I can't believe that I'm still in a slump after 5 years already. I've tried several medications and I'm now on Prozac. I'm beginning to think that I have treatment resistant depression and that there's no hope for me. I need to begin journaling again and writing out my feelings. I got out of the house today for the first time in a week. I didn't go to work either. I feel like such a waste of life sometimes. 😪 What do you all do to get out of your funk and depression when it's at it's worst.

[Hidden]

You did a really good job getting outside, and you're already doing amazing by wanting to start journaling again :). It is really hard, and your brain will try to lie to you and tell you that you're no good, that you're lazy, a waste etc. But you are not, full stop. I had a similar problem, thinking i was lazy wasting time, space, energy, and it's pretty hard to break that cycle, but it's definitely possible, and you're already taking really good steps by trying to help yourself even when it feels that you're running on empty, which shows just how much effort and work you are putting in. What has helped me the most is giving myself grace, space to rest and make mistakes and to be human, and telling myself I'm doing a good job. That I'm doing the best I can and that's enough, no matter what I get done in that day. It sounds so simple and maybe even wrong to think that way but I promise its true, and it genuinely helps. It's hard to change our way of thinking, so a good start is to let yourself take time to stop being so critical of yourself and to let yourself be human. On a more physical note, getting outside like you did, even if it's just standing or sitting outside for a few minutes and talking/typing/writing things out, so it sounds like you already set yourself on a really good start, I hope you pat yourself on the back and start feeling at least slightly better soon. You're doing a great job :).

[drakbiker1 in reply to Hidden]

have you considered electroconvulsive therapy

[Cookie2217 in reply to drakbiker1]

No I haven't. I'm a little weary of it all.

[Cookie2217 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you so much for your kind reply. It made me feel better instantly. I do need to give myself a little grace and stop being so hard on myself that's for sure.

[drakbiker1 in reply to Cookie2217]

sometimes electroconvulsive therapy works when other efforts fail

[Cookie2217 in reply to drakbiker1]

I have heard that I just find it a bit extreme. It's not like the old shock treatments but my aunt got those back in the day.

[drakbiker1 in reply to Cookie2217]

Modern ECT is much safer and more controlled with rigorous guidelines and. patient consent proto-calls in place

[Cookie2217 in reply to drakbiker1]

I know it's a lot safer but I would be more comfortable with going the ketemin route first I think. Have your done this type of ECT therapy. A friend of mine has and it helped for awhile but she is now taking Pristiq an antidepressant to assist with her symptoms which returned after ECT therapy.

[drakbiker1 in reply to Cookie2217]

You re talking about anecdotes (rare and irrepealable) cases. Check out the statistical result and balance them against continuing suffering. Get advice from psychiatrist. Then make a decision specific to the risk of thetreatment and the risk of continuing suffering

[Cookie2217 in reply to drakbiker1]

I get but I'm not interested in doing ECT right now. Thank you though. I've talked to a lot of people on this form about it and most people don't have success so why do it? Yes I could talk to a psychiatrist about it if I was interested but right now I'm not.

[Cookie2217 in reply to Hidden]

Hi Hidden. Thank you so much for you kind reply to me. It meant a lot for someone to see something I've been doing right for once. We can only do what we can do for that point in time but I need to be a little more gentle with myself and not beat myself up all the time and stay out of that bed. Myself care needs to be on the utmost and Forefront for me and not caring about your personal needs is really bad for you to do to yourself cuz it just makes you feel worse but it's just so weird that when I think about all the energy and effort it takes just to take a shower it seems such a daunting task. I should enjoy them rather than loathe them so much. I think I'm also going to switch it up and start taking my showers at night time so I'm not so rushed in the morning and let my hair just dry naturally overnight and then curl it in the morning. I usually get up 2 hours before I need to be at work so I don't have to rush I hate rushing in the morning who likes to get up anyway right LOL but then rushing after that it just puts me in a rotten mood. Good news though I am starting a job this week upcoming and I'm really looking forward to it I need to go to work everyday and not stay home because of my depression it's not an option for me anymore I need to buckle up buttercup and get on the straight and narrow.

[LoveforAll41]

Howdy Cookie, I am so sorry you have been in such a rough place for so long. I wholeheartedly agree with the first response and giving yourself compassion and grace. I am working on this with "The Mindful Self-Compassion Workbook". It has helped me a lot. Are you also doing talk therapy? I think that in most cases if we can change the way we think we can change the way we feel. I have done the ketamine route, and it helped me. Most helpful is ketamine assisted therapy. It can be very pricey, but 6 treatments for $1500 was better than wishing I was dead...

Anyway there is hope and peace out there. Sometimes I think change just needs a jumpstart with something big like ketamine or something as little as rearranging the furniture. ☮️

[Cookie2217 in reply to LoveforAll41]

I've also thought of doing ketamine therapy because what I've heard about it it really works for people including yourself so that is a positive for me. And what's the better alternative get better. I'm not a fan of the electroconvulsive therapy and there was a person on here trying to talk me into it and years and years ago my aunt had electroshock therapy and I just don't like the entire overall idea of having my brain Zapped in any way whether to wake it up or put things to sleep I just don't like that you know what I mean. I'm going to look into getting the mindful self compassion workbook too. Thanks for the tips. I really appreciate it.

[Lucci8]

Hi Cookie! I have used supplements Melaleuca Luminex, B12, L-Theanine. They have ALL had a positive effect on my anxiety, depression, and mood. Recently, I replaced the Melaleuca Luminex with L-Theanine due to the cost and it seems to work just as well.

I am looking into B Complex and Benfotiamine.

I have been taken Bupropion 300 XL for years and find that my mood needs supplements.

Please do your research and I hope this helps. I wish you the best. ❤️🤗

[Cookie2217 in reply to Lucci8]

Thank you so much for the information. I am signing up for some clinical trials and other avenues. Tired of living or should I say not living my best and most healthy life.