The funny side of lupys #6 (with a bit of the darker side of me, no apology attached)

About a year ago, I had to admit to myself that my pimped wheelchair would be required more use than i wanted.

So, putting my pride to one side, taking the bull by the horns, I tackled, with my wonderful daughter, the horror of the supermarket, which I had been avoiding , for many many months on my sticks...... I sure you will understand why.

So, wheelchair in car, daughter in driving seat and me with my spare, tamazapan.... of we went to a well known local supermarket begining with A......

A smile attached to my face, shaking in my shoes and every other part of my body, we started down the aisles.

All was going ok, the usual ignorance of people not withstanding, you know what i mean, blocking, ignoring, not making eye contact - but what came next was so unbeliveable that it was actually very sadly, funny as well, hence, my dark side of lupus comment..... read and weep and smile ruely and then you can laugh with my permission.....

There was a gluten and dairy ready meal, on the top shelf of the chiller that I was keen to look at, so my daughter asked a maturish lady, employed by the company, if she could oblige and pass the meal to me, she duly assissted but as she did, she glanced at me, glanced at my daughter then back at me and proceeded to pass the meal to my daughter and explain the meal to her on my behalf!

My daughter interupted her and explained that the meal was for me, the lady then looked at me again and apologised pointing out that she was not sure if I would understand being in a wheelchair and disadvantaged............!

Yes, you read right.... so I hope you will forgive my response and the lupus darkness in me, as this all happened so fast, I think I engaged my mouth, before my brain.....

'Thats ok I said, I just assumed you would be ignorant so no harm done!' and I wheeled myself away with my head held high and promptly burst into tears when I reached my car.

So wonderful people, thats the dark, yet sad but ultimately the funny side if lupus, because it will and has happened again....... the difference now, my retorts are funnier and when the brain fog lifts and I can remember them, I will pass them on.

May your funny bone keep the dark side of you under wraps.

Much love. X

16 Replies

  • Words fail me. However I do think your response was stunning, stunningly good. Kaz xx

  • She will be thinking on that for a long time amandaliley.

    Better luck next time, for every ignorant fool there is another who is enlightened.

  • Hi amandalilley

    Classic I love your response!!! People never fail to amaze me by how stupid they really are. 😱

    I get this all the time and the most dirtiest looks from people because I have a bald head (due to skin rashes and alopecia) drive, use crutches and use a mobility Scooter. My attitude is to stick two fingers up to them and say "your living your life and I'm damn sure I'm going to live mine."

    I'm sorry for all of us that have to endure stupidity on a daily basis!!!!!


  • Heh, yeah this. I've been preparing my boyfriend for the kind of judgey-ness he's going to get when I'm in a powerchair but he really won't have any idea until he actually sees and hears it. He's already getting a bit of it from my neighbours who strongly disapprove of me having a boyfriend full stop, for some reason.

    Guess we will just have to be louder *evil grin*

  • Have any of you seen a blog called The Seated View? Lene Andersen has juvenile onset RA and is in a powerchair. I think you'd enjoy her blog - she has a boyfriend, goes for "walks", writes books and does a great deal of advocacy for people with wheels. And deals with the same tripe from the ignorant.

    It isn't your brain that needs wheels after all...

  • Thank you, I will look forward to reading it. Much love. X

  • You go! You know us disabled people are not allowed sex...... its frowned upon! I have decided its because that cant figure out how we do it..... lol.

    Much love and laughter for adding to the funny side of lupus. X

  • 😂😂😂😂

  • Hi Amanda, really enjoyed your post, I have to use a wheelchair too, I do have people talking to me as if I'm simple, my answer has been often is "Its my legs that don't work not my brain", also "have you passed your test to drive that", my answer is "yes and my HGV as well" they usually scuttle off with there tail between there legs. And you will find with a few chosen words, wheel chairing will become less stressful, and quite sometimes fun xx

  • Thank you.... i am learning. I still only need it at the moment on bad days but I know my dry sense of humour with a bit of an attitude will help.... lol

    Thank you for reading and enjoying my posts, I do have a great religious one to tell but I am not quite ready with that one yet.......... all will be revealed.

    Much love. X

  • I worked in a school for children with disabilities and a new teacher started with no experience of disabilities. After ignoring her request 'put the wheelchairs at that table' several times I finally complied to the request and put the wheelchair at the table...... after taking the pupil out of the wheelchair 1st. I think she got the message as she used the pupils names after that☺Some people are so ignorant

  • Sheesh!

  • Omg.... thats worse than mine..... good on you for making the point stick like glue. You go! Much love. X

  • Hi I have had the same issues in fact , where I used to work ! Not with the shelf stackers with the managers ! It was shocking , it took me by surprise, how the mangers don't lead by example not one of my ex colleagues on the management team looked in my direction it was awrful and I will be letting the manger know next time I go in as I know all there names , I know what's on the staff walls on training in the back which says private staff only !

  • I would have said the same!

  • Oh good for you Amanda, quick piercing response: that's what we like! Yay 🎊🎉🎊 love it 😘

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