I had a medical procedure that was in itself very traumatic and also reactivated a childhood trauma. I have been in CBT for 2 1/2 years and recently started EMDR. I want this all to just go away! However, as in the case of the childhood trauma, which I thought had been dealt with, I fear I will always be vulnerable to the memories and that there will always be a risk of reactivating it. I want out of this hell!
does it ever completely go away?: I had a... - Heal My PTSD
does it ever completely go away?
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Hi Kalee!
I can really relate to wanting this to all go away! I'd like that as well.
I my opinion, CPTSD /PTSD don't completely go away BUT the symptoms can be gotten under control. And the good news is is that we gain more understanding In how to deal with the symptoms as time goes on. Of course it's more like a twisted and hilly path rather than a straight line so there will be ups and downs.
But there are some people on this forum who report being very stable now!
I am sending you strength and comfort! 💚💚💚
sometimes I feel the same. I have learned some of my triggers and can either avoid them or make a plan when triggered. I am no contact on my mom, since she is the cause of a lot of my trauma. It is hard to avoid toxic supervisors who remind me of her though.
I understand completely what you were saying, I have also had counselling the same as yourself, maybe it’s because I’m older than you, maybe because I have not experienced love that each and everyone of us desire and need.
I look back on my childhood and at first, it took me a long time to realise the damage that my childhood did to me, which I had carried the pain and burden into my adulthood.
We did not ask for this to happen to us, so it’s not our fault. I am 74 and I believe that unless we release the past, we carry it into our adulthood, this is not our fault because we did not ask to be born and the people who were supposed to care for us , look after us , love us did not do that. So, we still feel the pain of rejection.
Recently my Council said to me Liz this is not your fault then the tears came and since then I have felt emotionally free it’s quite amazing. I cry now quite easily before I could not cry.
Think of it this way your experiences as a child can enable you to help other people who have gone through the same experiences so you can honestly say I empathise with you.
When we speak to people and explain to them what we have gone through so many people have said to me I’m so sorry for you. I don’t understand what you’re going through which of course they don’t.
Yet , sometime you meet somebody and you start talking and listening to them and something clicks inside you and you know that that person understand what I have gone through and is empathetic towards you.
Your past cannot be changed, but you can deal with it by placing it in front of you and saying you will not win.,I am stronger than my past and you are, stronger because of your past you might not feel it at the moment but believe me you are, you will get through this time of remembering
Please remember it has already happened and it will not happen again.
You have come along way be proud of yourself.,say to yourself I am stronger than my past because I am now in the future of a new beginning.I pray you will understand what I have said because I do empathise with you.
Keep going to your counselling, remember You were not alone with the greatest of Love and understanding Liz 🙏🤗⭐️
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Hi Kalee55,
Welcome to the community.
I've heard from different people over the years and some have healed completely, others feel like they will need therapy and coping strategies at those times that bring trauma back.
I am facing a surgery and at this point I can't do this. I didn't remember I had medical childhood trauma that got reactivated.
I'm focusing on other things, planning and doing my best. Some days are really tough.
You are not alone...
I agree with others here that it doesn't ever completely go away but I have found with emdr therapy that it really helped reduce my reaction to the traumatic memories and emotions to where i am no longer triggered by them. I tried emdr with a general therapist and didn't find it helpful and then found a therapist that specialized in treating trauma that used emdr as part of the therapy and it really made the difference.
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give the EMDR time to effectively work. I personally have found it very liberating. I can’t say I’m not triggered on occasion but I quickly deal with triggered events by going quickly to my grounding tools.
Your therapist will be able to help you with grounding tools. My therapist gets me to practice them at the end of each session.
I
Look forward to future posts of yours on how you’re finding the EMDR.