Feeling really down... is it side effects?

[greenrainbow]

I just had a session with my therapist on Friday and I cried the whole time. I left feeling extremely down and barely made it through the weekend. I had an actual headache for a while but otherwise most of the time it’s like someone is squeezing my head. We are uncovering some of my childhood traumas and I’m wondering whether that’s the reason. I don’t have actual thoughts about that much but I’m just feeling extremely sad and also mad at my ex (still not over a breakup after 1.5 years). Is it normal to get worse in this way because of therapy? I’m doing somatic experiencing. I am going to see my therapist only in a month because she’s on holidays and I don’t know how to go through this at all. It’s not getting better after four days even despite loads of distraction

[Beingindependent Volunteer]

Oh yeah sometimes I feel worse before i feel better and sometimes a feeling will just come over you and I get that too

like yesterday I just felt I felt fear and I don’t know why so sometimes when you talk about things that it just makes things worse for a while but later gets better

and it takes a really long time to recover so I know it’s really frustrating because I just want it to be over very quickly but it can take a long time

So you have to have ways to keep yourself going

and I really like listening to different types of music that really helps me writing in a journal going for walks being in my backyard raking leaves

I just need to find something I have perpetual calendars that have inspiring messages and art with words that are encouraging I read those everyday

you just have to find what helps through what you’re going through

Take care

[Marnie22 Volunteer]

I am sorry that things are so hard for you at the moment.

I really hope my post won't seem too bizarre to you. Several years ago I was going through a terribly stressful time where I was feeling all sorts of strong emotions, particularly anger. I developed a strange horrible type of headache. The pain wouldn't go away despite my trying all the usual remedies. I had had this for about four days when I suddenly decided to do something on the way home from work. I drove to a quiet place in the countryside. I found a place where no-one was anywhere nearby. Then I just roared my feelings out. I shouted, screamed and yelled. Not words, just feelings from deep down inside me. I was really tired after this but by the time I arrived home, the weird headache had completely gone. I think it allowed physical tension to be released, along with some manifestation of my feelings.

Of course this may not be anything like what you are experiencing, but I just wanted to mention it in case.

I do hope that you feel better soon.

[greenrainbow in reply to Marnie22]

Thanks for sharing this great advice! I actually uncovered a lot of suppressed anger and actually pure rage combined with sadness. If I had a car I would do the same thing you did but for now I will just punch the pillow as much as I can and then cry in it.... it helps indeed. Happy you feel better

[Marnie22 Volunteer in reply to greenrainbow]

Thanks. I have a theory that every community in the country should have a space where people can go and scream and yell at the top of their voices to let out feelings and tension without them being dragged off by 'the authorities. It would be a great outlet for people and it might have some surprising benefits. After all, we often don't have a way to release this stuff.

[greenrainbow in reply to Marnie22]

I completely agree! But hopefully the world will also move into a less stressful direction and we won’t need it

[ScubaD]

I have been through similar. Letting out these emotions is natural. Taking quiet time afterwards and acknowledging what you are doing is hard work! This is not quick work so please do not force it, find things that you like to do or see friends to keep a sense of every day normality. Remembering may seem confusing but your mind will be keeping you safe while releasing past information. I checked the validity of mine from a range of sources, professional and others to gain the truth. I wish you well. Seek support from family and friends you can trust, take time for yourself to rest and then move forward steadily, i believe in you.

[greenrainbow in reply to ScubaD]

Thank you for the nice words! Your comment and others here made me realize my therapist is going too deep and too quickly. I need to discuss this with her and indeed slow things down.

[Marnie22 Volunteer in reply to greenrainbow]

That's good to get that awareness. I hope your therapist responds in a pisiand helpful way

[Nathalie99 Partner]

Hi greenrainbow,

I have had similar experiences, also in somatic experiencing therapy.

I was told that it's normal to feel worse before getting better. When you are discharging trauma from your body, it can feel like you are going through it again and/or feeling unwell.

It gets better.

You are facing the toughest things in your life. It's a big thing. You are very brave to do that...