Was hoping someone might have some tips and insights for me. I've recently met a young widower. He is just 4-5 years older than myself. We seemed to immediately click upon a chance meeting. We understand each other well from the stand point of grieving our marital relationships. I 'lost' my husband to DV and the subsequent lack of repentance on his part facilitated me divorcing him ( we've been separated for 1 year and divorced for 2 years =3) . This new friend and I have had some wonderfully frank discussions. We both want to be good friends and be supportive of each other. Some boundaries are up and he understands I have lots of responsibility to my several children I am raising alone. They come first. He has one young adult college aged son. He's seems to be struggling between grieving and reaching for a future for himself. I feel I am 'almost' over that stage of brooding over the lost one. I've been able recently to make more long term plans and have less daily struggle with intrusive thoughts. OF COURSE it is probably easier for me because I was harmed in my 15 years of marriage and in his there was a beautiful loving relationship. I have a survivor attitude that in the last 6 months has surprisingly emerged, just miraculously. SO I actually can say specific small steps have produced a fairly satisfying level of stability. I've shared most of that so believe I should concentrate on being a good listener. Does that sound right? Any cautions or Kudos? I also should note it is possible he is suffering complicated grief his wife's death was tragic. If you have any exhaustive articles on complicated grief please link me to them.
Last edited by Hope-8
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