Further to Depressed? Give this a miss.

[tulips123]

Struggling to know how to respond to all the kind messages left for me. I know that everything I've received comes from the hearts of people who totally understand, and I know that it all makes sense. Trouble is, I'm not sure how to change anything. I have a wonderful GP/consultants/community nurses/loving & caring family & friends. Medics are aware of how I feel, They cant help, much as they'd like to. Family/friends are a different problem altogether. They care for me and I care for them. I've become very adept at 'the painted smile'. I have such a long mental health history & I refuse to worry them. It's not even as if they can do anything about it. Sometimes think I'm ok, not that the pain (physical or emotional) is any better I just think I'm getting used to living with it. Just doesn't last for long, and each time I end up back here, i know it will pass, but also know it will come back again. The only person I could ever really talk to, connect with, spend 24/7 with and never feel irritated, bored, has really gone & is never coming back. You'd think after 2+ years I could deal with it, but I cant.

Thank you, you lovely people for 'listening'.

[Hidden]

Oh honey i feel for you and would hate to be where you are, theirs no official way to grieve and it will take you as long as you need and yet i doubt you ever get over it just used to them not being their but you are right that every one care for you and wish you the best. Their is nothing anybody can say as it just wont be your man's voice or comforting smile. Al we can do is help an anyway by listening and i'm sure i speak for all when we say no need to thank us we do it because we know you will be their to listen when we need it.

Comforting huggs honey xxxxx

[Hidden]

Hello Tulips, bless you! You are still grieving, it is still relatively early days. There is no time scale for grief and the loss of a loved one. During these times the bereaved tend to paint on the smile and act their way through their days to everyone else hiding their grief and their pain. It is important to let your grief out though Tulips, it's all part of the healing process.

Have you considered talking to someone at CRUSE Bereavement Care? "CRUSE Bereavement Care promotes the well-being of bereaved people and enables anyone bereaved by death to understand their grief and cope with their loss. As well providing free care to all bereaved people, the charity also offers information, support and training services to those who are looking after them.

Death is a part of life, and grieving a natural process. Cruse is committed to breaking the stigma around grief and ensuring that everyone, no matter how old or young, can access the highest quality support following a bereavement. Not only does Cruse provide a telephone helpline and the useful information you will find on this website, but our trained volunteers provide face-to-face support and practical advice in branches across England, Wales and Northern Ireland." (taken from CRUSE website)

Their contact info is as follows -

Daytime Helpline 0844 477 9400

Email - [e-mail]

Details of local branches -

crusebereavementcare.org.uk...

I hope this information is useful to you Tulips, please have a word with them. Sometimes speaking or pouring our hearts out to someone impartial can really help us during the grieving process.

We are here for you Tulips, we care about you and will do all we can to help and support you through this difficult time. (((hug))) xxx

[Ginsing]

Hun I send you a hug ((((((((((((((()))))))))))))))))))))) nothing else thinking of you gins x

[tulips123 in reply to Ginsing]

Thank you Gins. Appreciate the warmth coming through loud and clear! xx

[Teddysmum43]

I. Understand about grief am going through it myself. I will never be the same now my parents have gone,my mum died nearly two years ago and we were incredibly close but wasn't always an easy relationship,complicated and has been a really battle to deal with it,it's ongoing really. Am thinking of you and I hope we can both get through this but it's not easy.

[tulips123 in reply to Teddysmum43]

xx

[myrtil]

So sorry for your loss..I to was widowed will be 8 yrs next June...we were together a very long time.but life does go on,and at times its been real hard.I will always grief for him, but I have a life to live as well....sending ((((HUGS)))) xxx

[tulips123 in reply to myrtil]

xx

[Ozzygirl64]

Grieving can take such a long time but we are all here for you xxxxx