In this case, referring to my boyfriend's Mum - I have generally got on quite well with her; at least, up until her poor husband passed away from cancer on Christmas Eve last year. I managed to land myself in the bad books around that time with just about everyone, as I couldn't dash down to Wales to be with him because my Mum had managed to give herself concussion! That p***ed off him and his family. Then I did go down when my Mum was improving, but not well, on 27th December - that p***ed off my Mum! And, since then, I'm afraid his Mum has been a bit intrusive and demanding, and her selfishness is no longer tempered by her husband's inclination to consider others. As a result, she drops herself on her sons for a week, with little notice or consultation, and generally screws things up. But, this time, she's here for a purpose - to look after my boyfriend for 2 weeks after leaving hospital ... or not.
You see, she came up a week early, because things hadn't quite gone to plan with the op. Whether she didn't trust me to keep her informed, or it was just motherly concern, I don't know, but she always told him that she would still be giving him 2 weeks, as she would take unpaid leave from work (despite knowing about this op in February, she didn't save her leave like I did - just used it to visit her sons and sister-in-law regularly 'for a break'). Only, now he's out, she's insistent that she needs to go back this weekend, and 'he'll be fine without anyone there'. Not being funny, but he's been opened up from the ribs down to the groin, and he's improving, but nowhere near on fine form. On top of that, he can't drive for 6 weeks, or lift anything, or bend very well, and his oven is on a low level! His nearest friend/relative is me, 40 miles (and just under an hour) away! He's not going to be fine!
He had a bit of a rant at her, by all accounts - even bringing up that she did exactly the same on his Dad when he was dying. She knew he wouldn't last past Christmas right from when the poor man was diagnosed in May, but she still went into work every day, and stayed until late, putting in extra hours, telling him that she 'couldn't take the p***', and ended up giving him about 2-3 days, right at the end, when he was confined to a bed in the living room. You'd think she would have learned by now, but it seems that - however much she claims to hate her job - she will always put work above her family, although her employers seem to be very willing to let her take time when she needs it, and she isn't short of money.
To top it all off, every time he and I are talking about moving in together (which we've been delaying for a couple of years, due to his Dad's illness, and now his op), she seems to be trying to put us off. I don't know if it's because I'm still in the doghouse, or if she thinks he could do better, or just because she knows that I (like his brother's girlfriend) won't put up with her just turning up when she feels like it, tidying up so that nothing can be found, and generally interfering! With respect, I've got my own mother if I want some interference! Either way, I'm starting to get really annoyed with her, and am struggling not to say anything, because I don't want to make things any more awkward for him than they already are. But he's livid, and feeling a bit uncomfortable because this turn of events means he will probably end up staying at my house, and I can't be there all the time, so he'll be with my Mum. She's a lovely person, but can be difficult, and he's worried about staying there, so his Mum has left us all in a bit of a jam.
Typical: the one time the MILFO decides to FO is the one time we need her not to!