I Am Slowly Losing My Patience ...

I have a 2 year old toddler. As like all toddlers, she runs rings around me. In Febuary (end of if memory serves) she started a pre-nursery placement where she is there for 3 hours a day. I better explain that she is there because they seem to think that her development is behind (she isn't talking properly)

Of late, well since March, either I have not been well or she has not been well (she keeps coming home with colds and all sorts). Now, I had a 'meeting' with two of the staff members there and I had to explain that with my Fibro and the miles I was walking (there is no direct bus, will come to this is a sec) a day it was affecting my Fibro and I wanted to avoid flare ups. And trying to expalin how tired I get and how somedays I cannot go out due to dizziness and vision problems and not to mention the concentration issue as well - They still did not understand what I was saying. I do not feel safe going out when I am like that, and I will not risk my daughters life if something was to happen whilst out.

From door to door it is a mile. Add the miles up per day (dropping off, home, collecting, home) it is a grand total of ... Four miles! The first few days I did this, I really did not help myself. I was shattered and in pain. I was not able to take her in for 7-10 days just so my body can get back to normal-ish.

Eventually it was arranged that she could go in 3 times a week instead of the 5. Fair enough. BUT, they were trying to find me ways of getting to the nursery. For example - bus. I would have to go to the bus stop which is behind my house, wait for about 5-10 mins, then a ride into town which is ... 10 mins or so and then walk (yeah great thinking by them here) 10/15 mins from one end of town to the other. It is faster if I walked! And the comment one of the women made? 'You could always do that when you have a bad day.'

At that point I wanted to yell at her, she did not listen to a word I said. Bad day equals Me in no state to go anywhere

A taxi is not an option because I do not have the money for one. Which was the only thing they understood. And since my little one has started there her 'nap' routine is out the window therefore she is up until 9/10pm then she is up at 4/5am, which leaves me shattered at the end of it.

I am more or less on my own, I stay with my ex at the present until I get my own place, but he works two jobs so is hardly home anyway and no family near by (most in Russia, Germany or Wales) so getting help is not an option for me either.

I am so darn fustrated with these people, and my daughter loves going to nursery, but at the moment while she is still getting used to routine and what not it's become a nightmare. And them not understanding ... well they can be added to my list of people who just do not get it at all.

[sparkledust]

Do a leaflet drop at the nursery, ask the nursery staff for help, explain to them, they matter for the care of your child.

It does get better, really it does.

xx

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This is it ... I have tried explaining but it is not sinking in They only hear what they want to hear unfortantly. This is all purely voluntary anyay, and even my mum is saying I should find something else for the little one. x

[jazher]

HI kaige,

I dont blame you for feeling like this. I couldnt even get on the bus to take my kids anywhere. I am lucky as the nursery and the school is just up the road. Is there anywhere closer hun?

I dont think these people will ever understand and sometimes i just think people dont want to.

Good luck with it all and its easier said than done but you really need to stop stressing as you will just send yourself into a flare hun.

hugs, kel xxxx

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No nothing closer, the next one is in the other direction from my front door and is just the same distance. At the end of the day they got to realize that my daughter comes first, therefore they got to be patient with me. Which they are not obviously, more patronising. I think all they care about is the money they are getting for the little munchkin being there.

It does not sink in with these I don't think.

[Lioslaith]

You have my greatest sympathies and hope something happens, sooner rather than later, to help make it easier for you.

I find it hard enough to get up the energy and control my pain enough to drive my nephews around when needed to school/nursery and like yesterday a dental appointment and shudder to think of live without my little car.

You definitely have my admiration for doing this so long on foot.

I have to remind myself NOT to be so snappy etc., with my active nephews, esp. the toddler, I'm trying hard not to do that and to remember he's just a little boy and it's not his fault I'm tired, cranky, sore and snappy so not to let him suffer.

I'm getting better at that, I hope!!

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I have now learnt to control the snapping with my little one. Just not with certain adults.