Hi hairdresser complained to my daugh... - Fibromyalgia Acti...

Fibromyalgia Action UK

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Hi hairdresser complained to my daughter re me using blue badge



I am a total of seven medical conditions ME Fibro diabetes and four autoimmune conditions one of which is similar to RA and a balance problem sonI have had a blue badge for nearly 20 years. Recently my daughter and I went to hairdresser and parked the car as usual in a disabled space. I have significant problems with walking pain fatigue and dizziness. The manager of the salon commented to my daughter something about people using a disabled space when they don’t look disabled. Should I say something or not go back to hairdresser. I have to say this happened to another daughter in another location. In fact a woman screamed st her and accused her of fraud. She had MS.

49 Replies

Hi I would say, if people keep their nose in their own business , this would be a lot better world. Hope u r feeling better take care

My sister is sick of people’s remarks, I have found a sticker for the car that has a figure standing and the wheelchair simmbal the other way and wording is “Not Every Disabilities Are Visible” Got some patch’s for our jackets too. Just hope it works

lesleyann950 in reply to Bobby3

Brilliant idea

Jennyw59 in reply to Bobby3

Great idea!

I get remarks to if I use a disabled bay like u I have quite a few health problems .My husband has snapped a few times at people when they make comments .was telling my nurse and she said the same not every disabilities is visable even airports have Line yards for different disability s .I would complain if it was me amy

lesleyann950 in reply to Amy65


lesleyann950 in reply to Amy65

I got one of these lanyards for myself and my daughter. It is actually sometimes dangerous for me to walk as I have had very severe seizures in the past brought on by stress and lack of sleep


print out a note with your doctors surgery address on it. "If you are interested in my medical condition please contact them otherwise keep your ill informed opinion to yourself"


Doctors will not give out details about patients but thanks for your support

desquinnAdministrator in reply to lesleyann950

I know that but that's not your issue 😀

I would do both, say something i.e. "Not all disabilities are obvious just like some people don't look ignorant and judgemental but they are...." and don't give her your custom anymore. Don't let it get you down. x

lesleyann950 in reply to Ramjets


I would have been tempted to tell her she didn't look ignorant, really take no notice xx


My reply always is ….. " I may not look disabled, but then again, you don't look stupid and ignorant either" . That usually shuts them up. xx

ZAbbott in reply to M0AL61

If you do this wait until *after* she's cut your hair though! :-O X-)


Even though your badge was displayed?

lesleyann950 in reply to Hidden

I get your points I do These things annoy me to


The trouble is people abuse the blue badges maybe that's happened to someone close to her and they couldn't get parked ,did you see it on telly where people are using fake badges?it was on a week or two ago,you should ask her if she was referring you you the disabled or the ones that do park out there that don't display a badge.no point being passive aggressive to your daughter,if she was that is.I'd ask,explain how it sounds to you both but maybe just maybe she was annoyed by people that abuse it cause her someone close can't park&come into see her,there's many reasons why she could've said it I just saying be open minded if you're going to ask her.🙊🙏👵

lesleyann950 in reply to Hidden

Hi people can notice that I have issues I don’t walk in a straight line and slowly. The fake badges aren’t my problem

You don’t need to justify your illness to anyone you don’t have to be told by people all the time or explain your illness to anyone or how it affects you

lesleyann950 in reply to Hidden

But I get your point however my disability issues are confidential if you see the questions that are asked about very intimate issues. She is a manager of a shop. Disabled people must make up a large part of her clients. I used to disability equality training for organisations maybe she needs some things explained. Lots of people with blue badges don’t look disabled eg heart disease lung disease etc

Midori in reply to lesleyann950

If the shop manager isn't disability aware, what hope for her staff? It isn't her business to comment on your blue badge; it's her business to cut hair. Might be an idea to remind her that what goes on Outside her premises is not her business.

Janettewhitelaw in reply to Hidden

She should mind her own business tell her she can have your blue badge and the illnesses that come with it reason you got it in first place

Thanks for all the comments folks. I think I should let it go. It’s a great hairdressers and if I don’t go back the only person I am hurting is mysrlf

Fair comment lesleyann, maybe let it go, get a sticker for the car and then enjoy your haircut knowing the truth (reasons for your badge and also the sticker being there) have a wee smile to yourself xx

Disgraceful behaviour from the hairdresser. I have a sticker on my car I bought online it says NOT ALL DISABILITIES ARE VISIBLE. I would say something thoughxx

I am going to get one

I have a sticker, my daughter and I both have Fibromyalgia and there are different levels of it, together with the pain too.

Some days neither of us can walk other days I can she can’t & visa Versa.

We use the stickers and also have a pin badge on our jackets.

Some general public just don’t care have no interest in others peoples feelings and unless you have No legs in their eyes they really feel you shouldnt be parked in a disabled parking space.

I say this.....if you want my blue badge, if you want my disabled space, then Have My Disability that comes with it!

Step into my Shoes and wear them for 12 hours, Then tell me if you want my Disability!!

I would have told her to mind her own business and I would certainly not go back to her.

It is important to raise awareness of disability so I always explain

my brain injury. It is not possible for me to drive so I always use

public transport. Raising awareness is the way to win respect.

God Bless You!

People should mind their own business.

Midori in reply to KnackeredKaty

I agree; but people nowadays seem to want to be judgemental when it is not their business. My comment to them is 'How is this your business, exactly?'

KnackeredKaty in reply to Midori

Too right

DO NOT feed the uneducated They would feast on it if you reacted.

Hi I say

You can’t see the wind but you can feel it !!!

Go back if she's a good hairdresser. You've got nothing to justify why you need a blue badge. Hold your head high and pity her ignorance!

I sympathise sweetheart, like most of us I too have been asked why I have a badge and even told when I was battling breast cancer " you don't look ill!"

I think I would take my business elsewhere. Life's too short and tough enough without trying to justify yourself to someone who, quite frankly, should be more interested in your hair than your blue badge. Take care. Xx

I recently gave a bus driver a dressing down for driving past me because there was another bus at the stop. There were no seats on the stationary bus and I ended up on a 20-minute journey that absolutely killed my back, hips and legs. The public definitely need more education on invisible disabilities...

Jennyw59 in reply to LupieMani

I know. I had to stand in a hot corridor for 20mins when they called us to board a plane! I was so annoyed I should have complained. Dont call people until they can walk straight onto plane.People see us looking ok but I just cannot stand for even a minute or two without discomfirt increasing. I think next time i'll wait till they tannoy my name to board!


Have you tried getting assistance when travelling by plane. Because my daughter had MS and I hVe ME and fibromyalgia and balance disorders we can book wheelchairs. If necessary an ambulift can take you straight to the plane with no stairs.

Hi Lesley that is the reason we were stuck in the corridor because they were putting a gentleman on the plane with a lift which is great but they need not have called us till they had got him on. Luckily I can get up stairs but slowly and walk it's just standing I can't do. You know what were all like we don't like to make a fuss about our condition but next time and if any of yous are flying just ask when they call you are you actually boarding or going to have to wait in a queue. There not going to leave without you anyway if your luggage is on board! 😂😂😂

This is the problem they call you then you have to stand in line half an hour . In the past Zi have used a stick with a small stool. Because of my daughter now and granddaughter we are going to use ambulift. She collapsed coming through airport the last time. I am a carer as well as my chronic conditions.

Hi Lesley I was thinking about getting a stick stool - no doubt they wouldnt let me on with it saying it's a weapon 😂😂😂😊

Inhave put up with it for years, i have complex regional pain syndrome causing severe leg and pelvic pain... its obvious when i walk though. The bigger problem has been my age and looking even younger than i should, i bega using badge in mid 20's, just turned 50 but still usually considered to be in early 30's now. So they sit in their car and stare at me, they watch me adjust my clock, they watch me struggled to get out of the car, and then i limp and mostly vindicated. One man came to me even before i took one step and yell at me that clearly i didn't need to park there... to that he accused me of having loaned a relatives card. I show him the picture abd the abuse continn b ues because my hair was shorter... why do they think it has anything to do with them!?! These days my daughters bring me a small yytrolley to support myself while walking... it helps, yet still maybe once every 4 months i an subjected to the stare!

Jennyw59 in reply to Tia218

Oh dear! It's put me off applying for a badge - I can't stand the stress of confrontation atm x😣

I don’t always use my badge just for this reason. I have good days but a lot more bad recently but I always feel like I am being judged for taking a disabled space. I am 48 and have just recently had my second knee replacement. I have rheumatoid and osteo arthritis and Fibro and I’m a single parent to five wonderful children. Until recently I was a certified ofsted approved childminder but have had to give this up because it is too much. The people I have known over the years all look at me and say “well you don’t look ill”. But they don’t see the day to day struggles we all deal with.

Jennyw59 in reply to Jackyb-69

Oh Jackie i'm so sorry. It's an awful struggle day to day then some knobhead comes along, thinks you look fine and gives you all that stress. If only people could walk a mile in our shoes they would soon give the disabled badge back to us! Big hugs xx😘 just ignore ignorant people - they havent got a clue have they?! Xx

Jackyb-69 in reply to Jennyw59

Thanks for that xx

Hello and seasons greetings, don't get upset or worried about what people think or say. I have a blue badge and while I am getting my mobility scooter out of the car I see others using bays with no visible disability, aids ect. As long as you are an elegiible badge holder let them think what they want and be, remain ignorant.

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