PTSD & Fibro

[Z_oo72]

Hello everyone, i have some questions and i just want to get something off my chest and use this space to get my head together if thats ok?... sorry, this might be a tad lengthy and a little sweary hear and there ... And thank you for reading, any feedback about my questions would be hugely welcome : )

So yeah, Im just wondering about the connections between ptsd & fibro.

Has anyone had a difficult experience to deal with then gone onto develop fibro? chronic fatigue etc? are fibro and PTSD and ME the same things even?

sorry if this is an obvious link that i have just today hit on and everyone knows about this already, I am just thinking about exactly why i have developed fibromyalgia in the hope that i can heal inside and make it go away. .. For ever and ever!

A friend told me today that she heard a radio program yesterday that speculated there may be a link between ptsd and fibro. So i have been goggeling away and have found lots of good stuff to read. i will post up any thing that i feel strikes a cord.

The thing is with my situation, i have never been involved in anything physically horrific but i have experienced a series of very harrowing and harmful emotional situations that caused me to have some sort of mental break down. The fibro symptoms and hypo thyroid symptoms made an appearance around this time too and i became very ill, but stupidly have not put two and two together. i was bed bound and in huge amounts of excruciating pain that made me writhe in agony. i honestly thought that i was going to die in the night. i felt super mental crazy, howling at the moon clawing at my skin stylee and weird and really really anxious to the point of real scary panic attacks at the thought of having to see friends who called by to see me. i began to extract my self totally from all social circles as i did not want to see anyone, i could not. i did not trust anyone apart from my cat. Having my cat friend to care for saved my life. Quite literally.

Personally, i have always described what happened to me as traumatic and damaging, i found the aftermath really hard to adjust to. 6 years on and 3 CBT programmes' later, i am finally starting to get somewhere with this. i feel like i have been in a waking sleep where i went through the motions of life with out really being present. i cant remember things, events, chats with people... its all patchy or blank. thats quite scary to experience.

I also just realised today that the events that took place that caused me harm, is the only topic that i have not disclosed with any therapists i think because i could not bring my self to say the words out loud because if i did speak about it i would relive the whole story in glorious teknicolour and cause my self huge stress and upset for some time after. i know i must be out the other side now because i am having lots of eureka moments... mini enlightenments almost. As i write this i am aware that i have to be true to my self and nail my colours to the mast. i have to face ALL my demons if i am to truly move on and recover from this fibro ****ery. And, i know that i will need to be prepared for what follows each therapy session. i have to plan ahead to save my self from falling down.

incidentally, is Gabapentin an anti depressant???

I am feeling more positive and actually happy. im happy... i have finally been given pain relief, i can't quite believe just how much pain i had to suffer before this happened. unbelieveable. i feel like shaking my gp untill her head falls off! Gabapentin and Naproxen for pain and inflammation, awesomeness x 1000. i am starting to feel like i can really get my life back so some semblance of normality because i am not entrenched in feeling pain and woe because of the pain.

i just cant be this person that i have become due to the list of health issues i seem to have developed. im sick to death of it all. At times in this journey i am mentally exhausted. Pathologically exhausted and disillusioned by my seemingly flimsy constructions of my own reality and existence. im fat and miserable because i am ill and not as active as i once was ... maybe this new medication will give me a new lease of life. i really hope so because this is not who i really am, this fibro person these pills and pain and Edited By Admin,ugh, the Gp's... the appointments, the time off work, sickness interviews the guilt in letting people down, the lonely darkness and everything else that comes with being chronically un well , its all too humiliating. i hate it and it can go **** its self.

I love reading the couch to 5k posts because they give me inspiration. i could be doing that one day... i've started walking in the woods and fields. now the sun is here i can lay on the grass in total silence and stare at the huge sky and listen to the birds singing, god they are so happy at the moment... nature is so healing. i actually feel blessed to have these moments. i've not felt happiness in such a long time. how utterly sad is that. what a shame.

i have to help my self out of this while i still can. i want to live not just exist

thanks again for reading.

love

lots of

Zu xx

[rosewine]

Quite a few people on the forum have had PTSD and developed fibro afterwards. Most of us prior to fibro have had very stressful events or long periods of underlying stress. If you think about it if you are stressed you tense your muscles and fibro pain is often felt most in the muscles.

Gabapentin is not usually a first course of treatment in depression but I believe it has been used in high doses to try to help. It is a sister drug to Pregablin and I know that can help with anxiety.

It sounds as though you have been on an extremely long and tortuous journey but hopefully you are starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel. My OH had a breakdown about 8 years back but only recently has truely opened up about some childhood experiences but that has now led to more help than he had before. In some ways if they don't know the full truth it can be difficult for them to properly help you but of course can understand your reluctance to relive distressing events.

Yes we hate the changes the illness bestows on us as inactivity leads to weight gain and the meds often don't help our cause. It is good that you are starting to get out into nature as it can be a great healer.

Just a friendly hint the admins will probably just have to edit one or two words as we aren't allowed to swear even though this illness is enough to make anyone have a good curse. Take care.xxx

[Z_oo72 in reply to rosewine]

Hey Rosewine, thanks so much for your reply.

Its ok about the edits and sorry if i offend any one by them. its just how i feel.

Yes, honesty is the best way forward with therapists and of course in general. I know i need to make this latest chance of help work. and i need to face the thing that haunts me to make it stop, to try to feel less stress about it all and hopefully feel better. There is so much to untangle.

I have been put on the waiting list for the pain clinic program in London so i have hope and trust the team to help me help my self.

Im lucky i have solace and find peace in nature.

I need to start counting my blessings rather than navel gazing over my woes...

Its gonna be ok

thanks again

[rosewine in reply to Z_oo72]

When you are ill and depression it can be a glass half empty kind of world but hopefully your glass will slowly start to fill. I hope you get a place with the Pain clinic soon.x

[Z_oo72 in reply to rosewine]

Gosh, i know. I seem to slip into the gloom quite easily these days. It is because of the pain i experience i think. I forget that anything else exists .. its quite bonkers really when i think about it. I do know that my glass is half full. I'm lucky about the pain clinic, i cant wait!

all the best and enjoy your weekend

Zu : )

[biffbrain]

Hi just to say I have fibro too and what a weird illness it is !!! Ur definitely not alone in the struggle to try and sort out mental state and meds. It's understandable to feel the way we do - but I think only people who have the same experience can totally get it.

I find sitting in my small garden listening to the birds really helps my mood . I sit there and realise that life is all around me . It's very calming .

I do hope u make some progress with everything soon

[Z_oo72 in reply to biffbrain]

thanks so much for your reply Biffbrain. its really hard for others who havent got it to fully understand yes. my partner finds it hard at times with me but we some how muddle through. he is an angel.

i think the sunshine and fresh air really helps to clear some cobwebs away. i love spring and i had forgotten that.

its all going to be ok i think. i'm going to do my best to keep the positive vibes going.

Enjoy your garden time, all the best

Zu : )

[biffbrain in reply to Z_oo72]

Bless u . Spring is beautiful !

Hope u have a peaceful pleasant day 😊

[TheAuthor]

Hi Z_oo72

I sincerely hope that you are feeling as well as you possibly can be today? *NHS Choices says some of the possible causes of Fibro could be related to stressful or traumatic events such as:

In many cases, the condition appears to be triggered by a physically or emotionally stressful event, such as:

an injury or infection

giving birth

having an operation

the breakdown of a relationship

the death of a loved one

I have pasted a *Wikki excerpt about Gabapentin below:

*Gabapentin marketed under the brand name Neurontin among others, is a medication used to treat epilepsy, neuropathic pain, hot flashes, and restless leg syndrome. In epilepsy it may be used for those with partial seizures. Wikipedia

Molar mass: 171.237 g/mol

CAS ID: 60142-96-3

Trade name: Neurontin, others

Thank you so much for sharing your experiences and insights, and I want to sincerely wish you all the best of luck, and please take care of yourself.

All my hopes and dreams for you

Ken

[Z_oo72 in reply to TheAuthor]

Dear Ken, thank you for taking the time to reply to my post and for the info. You are such a Legend.

I'm ok, i hope you are too.

I have to go out now as i have a busy day ahead of me. I will write some more later on.

All the best

Zu : )

[TheAuthor in reply to Z_oo72]

Good luck my friend.