Very sad day for me 😒😒

No Mother's Day card no message just nothing. My son and I where very close all of his life. Then he married and his wife from the first time she met me she would always give snide remarks and eventually I couldn't take it any more and snapped back at her. She has to be the most unkindest person I have ever met in my life. I don't think she could cope with how close my son and I where. I miss him very much and my only grandson. I just do not know what to do. I have been there for them all, right from the very beginning. But she always came in with nasty remarks and One day she told my son a bare face Lie and I know about it and my son doesn't but one day I will tell him. Then one day I snapback because I have had enough I was the best thing when I was giving her things but that never lasted long everytime when she came on facetime with my son she would always ask for something to be paid for, they live abroad so that is why we always spoke on FaceTime. I only have one son and one grandson and I have only seen my grandson for the first 18 months and he is now 2 1/2. So had some tears today because my son would always spoil me on Mother's Day. It's a very sad world when you don't know what could come in and upset you very close family.HAPPY MOTHERS DAY to all the mums out there. I wish you all as well as you can be and take good care of yourselfs. 😒😒😒xxxx

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  • So sorry. Sending Hugs.

  • Hi Kitten-Kat23 thank you so much. I truly hope that you are as well as you can be. Take good care of yourself. Jan πŸ€—πŸ€—xxx

  • Oh Jan, I can so relate to this, my son also used to spoil me rotten on mother's day, he has a son who is 13 and thankfully , I have managed to prevent his evil and nasty partner from blighting his sons life, she was wicked to him when he was little. But,it has been at the expense of my relationship with my son. He is not a nice man, but he did love me and I him until his new partner came along, and she has slowly destroyed his links with his entire family.

    All we can hope is that one day, in a flash of blinding light, they will see thru the lies, and start to question, and just maybe attempt to repair the situation.

    For me, its unlikely, but I still hope

    Love and hugs to you my darling, xxxx

  • Hi Ccupcake thank you for your reply. It is really horrible that we end up with daughter in laws like we have. But as you say they might see the light one day. But I think that they hate the closeness we have with our sons. Now I am not there she might not be that nice to my son. My son told me that in the beginning of there relationship she said some hurtful things to him. But when he told her she said I don't mean that it's not what I feel in my heart. But I think that is a lot of bull it's just here true colours and she had to cover up he ugly tongue. I truly hope that you are as well As you can be. Take good care my friend. Jan xxxπŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€—

  • πŸŽπŸŽ‰πŸŽΆπŸŽΆπŸ’žcouldn't post a card, bit happy mother's day to you xx

  • Ah thank you cupcake that's really lovely of you at least I have that from you. Take good care of yourself my friend. πŸ˜˜πŸ€—xxJan

  • I just saw your post, this is very sad for u, I am sure u have been a fantastic Mum to your son over the years. Try contacting your son a tell him how much u miss him. It will be difficult to have a relationship with his wife but u only have to tolerate her for a very short time. It is v sad that she is jealous of a loving mother and grandmother. It may not be Mother's day where he is living as it is celebrated on different days in other countries so it may not have occured to him. In any case, sending u much love and kind thoughts.

  • Thank you funnyface22 I did try and speak to him sometime ago but he was not interested and never replied back to me. So no I just have two wait until he wants to speak with me unfortunately. Her mother lives out there and they always celebrate Mother's Day so maybe he gave me a thought or two I am not sure I can only hope. Take good care of yourself my friend. πŸ€—πŸ€—xxx Jan

  • To all you mums. I just wanted to wish you a late happy Mother's Day. I sadly don't have a mother in law I had a boyfriend with whom I'm still friends with. Ur I adored his mum and still do. I still send her a card and meet up for a chat and coffee not as much as I would like to but we always make time on special occasions be it a day or so early or late but I always make sure she has a card. I always want her to know that I valued and value her time friendship love comments and any guidance. I'm not 100% perfect and don't pretend to be but I truly wish one day that I find a nice chap with a lovely mum that I can have as my friend / mother in law and someone it too can call mum. I'm not trying to make any of you sad but I just wanted to show you that there are some nice girls out there who want to hold out a hand in friendship love and extended family. After all your sons are made partly of you and that's something to be grateful for as you guided and advised and taught them for there future and generations to come.

    It makes me so sad when I read stories of how people can come in to loving families and do this type of thing. One thing I would say is never give up on your children or grandchildren and never think they don't love you. Sometimes as a child you can also get put in situations that are hard to always get out of or talk about to you parents. I'm not taking any sides or trying to patronise anyone but never give up on your children as a child will always need love there mum deep down after all you only get one. And not to forget those poor dads too they can also go through a lot with daughter/son in laws and there children.

    So here's from one of hopefully the good nice girls and wishing you all gentle hugs and never give up and Happy Mothers Day.πŸ’πŸ’πŸ’πŸŒΉπŸŒΉπŸŒΉπŸŒΈπŸŒΈπŸŒΈπŸŒ·πŸŒ·πŸŒ·πŸ’‹xxx

  • Hi twinkle0411 thank you for your lovely reply. It is really lovely to hear that you are still friends with your ex boyfriends mum. I am sure she must treasure you as a person. You sound really lovely and I wish that I could of had a daughter in law like you who sees sense in the boys mother. We are very kind people and have always been kind to her that she used to make very bad remarks about me on the way I looked even when she came to my home most people always say what I lovely home you have but the only remark I got from her was I found a little bit of mould in the shower room I hope you don't mind I cleaned it away. My partner heard this and had to walk out of the room into the garden because he cleaned the shower room and he just wanted to hold his tongue. I do nothing but clean my home all the time because I enjoy cleaning so I have a very very clean home. When I told my niece she said she would need to have a magnifying glass to find anything in you're home. My niece also said do not worry about her because she is a very nasty person and you are a much better person than she will ever be. But that same day my sons friend came round in the evening and his wife said in front of her what a beautiful home you have. All of us are getting on really well and she just walked over and leaned against my son for security I think. Maybe now you have a little insight to her she really is not a nice person. I truly wish you well in finding the right person for you. Take good care of yourself. Jan πŸ€—πŸ€—xxx

  • Happy Mothers Day!! I'm so sorry to hear this, I'm sure he does think of you. I hope eventually you can have a relationship with your son and grandson. Take care

  • Hi Danny1990 thank you very much I really hope so. Take good care of yourself.Jan πŸ€—πŸ€—xxx

  • I hope so too, such sad circumstances for you and you definitely do not deserve to go through this. Sending you kind thoughts your way. Take care xxx

  • I feel for you. I bit my tongue many, many times. Then there comes a time when it all comes out. That changed relationships. I've seen people being used and then dropped when they are no longer useful. Now I'm disabled, so not useful anymore, I don't get many visits, but today they came without wives/partners (yippee) So I had a lovely day and I'm grateful. I hope you can have the same one day.

  • Hi Sewnsew I am really pleased for you I'm really happy that you had a lovely day. Please don't ever believe that you are not useful you are useful in so many ways and always believe that. I truly hope that one day I will have the same as you that my son comes to see me. Take good care of yourself my friend. Jan πŸ€—πŸ€—xxx

  • Happy, Happy belated Mother's day Jan101. Tell your son how sad you feel when he does not appear to think of you on Mother's day. Sometimes the better the mum you have been the harder such things can be to understand & accept! I am so sorry you are hurting so much & I hope you get another belated card from your son!!

    Peace & Love Pixiewixie xxx

  • Hi Pixiewixie thank you so much for your reply I keep wishing and check in the letterbox but to no avail. Maybe next year there might be one for me. I wish you well and take good care of yourself. Jan πŸ€—πŸ€—xxx

  • I had a cousin who loved his mum like your son then he married the She devil and ruined everything some people can be evial Why don't you phone you son and ask why Tell him how uppsett you are xx

  • Hi Erny I tried contacting him and told him how much I love him and never got a reply. Maybe one day he will come and see me. I have always been a very good mum to him. So maybe one day you never now. I wish you well and take good care of yourself. Jan πŸ€—πŸ€—xxx

  • Well I hope it all works out for you xx

  • Morning Erny thank you. I hope so too. Take good care of yourself. Jan πŸ€—πŸ€—xx

  • Hi Jan I feel bad for you but as funnyface22 has mentioned he's abroad and here in the USA mother's day is still some time away! There my be a chance he'll rememberπŸ˜€ take care. Chris.

  • Hi Chris I know he knows when Mother's Day is in the UK because his mother in law is out there and his sister in law and they always celebrate Mother's Day the UK one with his wife's mother. Maybe next year hopefully I may get a card if nothing else. Thank you very much for your reply. I wish you well and take good care of yourself. Jan πŸ€—πŸ€—xxx

  • Hi again Jan101

    I really feel your pain, and I want to how sorry I am that this is happening to you. It is clear how much you love your son and grandchild. I want to sincerely wish you all the best of luck and please take care of yourself my friend.

    All my hopes and dreams for you

    Ken x

  • Hi Ken thank you so much it's very kind of you to write again. Yes I love them both very very much. I would dearly love to see my little grandson. Maybe next year I will get a card if nothing else. You never know. Take good care and I wish you well. Jan πŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€—xxx

  • Please take care of yourself my friend x

  • My heart goes out to you. There can be little as hurtful as this. Hugs to you :)

  • Hi fenbadger thank you so much and yes I agree with you it is so hurtful. Never mind maybe next year I will get a card. Fingers crossed. Jan πŸ€—πŸ€—xx

  • Hi Jan , I COMPLETELY UNDERSTAND,

    My Only Daughter an her now Husband an 2 Granchildren don't talk to me , ever though they have had Β£23,000 of me , my Granddaughter last year told me im not her nan , she was 4 at the time . My Daughter last year went to the Police after i gave her Β£6,000, for her Wedding last May , told them i broke her nose , OMG 12 at night the police are Banging at my door , wanting to take me to the Police Station , Lucky for me , i had internal Bleeding from an Ulcer, so they took a statement in my home .IV NEVER HIT MY ONLY DAUGHTER ,i said thats the Biggest lie iv ever heard , if id Broken her nose , she would have had to go to Hospital an had it straightened an she would have had 2 Black eyes as well , or gone to the Doctors , The Police got back to me after 2 weeksof checking my statement, i was cleared , but that stress , caused me to have another Heart Attack .All my friends an my parents couldn't believe what she had done , All because she didnt want me at her Wedding because of , 1 her farther my ex husband and 2 she had told everyone that she bought her car an paid the insurance, 3 id paid for her husband motor bike an insurance , plus lots more id paid for, Also they lived with me for nearly a year RENT FREE AND FOOD , then his cousin come down from London , i had him living with me as well , also he didnt pay for a thing .Her boyfriend who is now her husband , couldn't move back in with his mum caused his younger brother had his bedroom , i couldn't see him on the streets. She also had a baby boy in October iv not seen him either.they turned up at my parents 2 weeks ago asking for Β£10,000 for a Deposit for a house.Then on top of that, all her mates an her have slaged me off on Facebook, an told everyone that im a Nutcase.I give her everything an she treats me like dirt.I wouldn't mind when her dad walked out on us , he never gave me a penny for her , i had to sell all my Jewellery just to eat ,an this is how i get treated.

    So Jan i know how you are feeling, all i can do is send a BIG HUGG to you , remember your not alone .

    If you ever want to talk ,or message , please do so , im here for you .

    Love & Huggs.

    jacqui xx

  • Hi jacqui oh my God how awful is she to treat you this way after all you have done for her and her now husband. What sort of man is he knowing what you have done for her and him. They really sound awful people. I should imagine that your family are beside themselves with anger what she has done ame him. I would Love to know what your parents said to her when she went to ask for Β£10,000. That is absolutely disgusting. I cannot believe after all you have done that she can treat you in this way. I know my son has taken her side. However he would never do that to me after we have fallen out. He never really liked asking me for money until he got with her. Every time she came on Facebook she would always say about this needs paying and that needs paying and we don't have the money. I will try just to ignore her. Then one day my son finally got his compensation and she was on face time and said to me o we have to pay for this I said to her what about my sons compensation and she said I told you that we have not touching that we need to keep saving. I could not believe my ears she wanted me to pay and yet they have that money there. I could see the embarrassment on my sons face. She is one of awful person. Then when my son was in hospital the next day after his operation he tried to speak to me on face time and I said to him give the phone to her and save your energy then she took the phone and I said are you okay love then she moved agian because the Sun was in the way and the next thing she said to me did not shunt me. Well it was at that time I absolutely broke and had enough of her and I shouted I never shunted you how could I shunt you when I asked to speak to you. Then I started shouting I have just had enough of you and she got the shock of her life. It was from all that I have never had anything to do with her. After her sister spoke to me and I said I would pay the hospital bill she sent me a text to say thank you for taking a lot of worry off our heads and we are a family and we all love you. I thought what a lot of rubbish it was only because I was paying the bill. It was always the same after I paid for something she would look for more and more. So I thought no more am I falling into that trap. I never replied to her. Then I waited for my son to reply and say thank you for paying the hospital bill and I never got anything from him. So I sent him a message and said I cannot understand why you did not reply but if I am not good enough then neither is my money. And it is from there I have never hear from them again and they also stopped putting pictures of my grandson on Facebook so I could not see how he was growing up. My ex-husband sent me some photographs of my little grandson but that was only the one time he also tried to speak to my son and told him you only have one mum so never forget about that. Your mum only has you he said my ex-husband I am lucky because I have two children to love not like your mum she only has one. My ex-husband knew that she was in the background I could hear him so that is why he spoke loud enough to make sure she could. My son never replied to anything his father had to say. Maybe he will think on that I don't know. I only know how would she feel if my little grandson did that to her when he got married and had children. When I think on all the hurtful things she has said to me over the last two years I think to myself why did I put up with it I think I know why because of my son and my little grandson. My son never married to later in life he was 38 so I was really looking forward to the day he settle down and look what I got her daughter in law from hell. Thank you for your message at least now I know there is a few others that have had experiences with the children. I would like to keep in touch with you because I know you would understand. I wish you well and take good care of yourself my friend. I am always here for you too. Jan πŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€—xxx

  • Thank you Hun , my parents didn't believe me when i told them about the Police , even though my 2 best friends were present when the police came back to take my statement, i told my parents to call them and i even gave them the name of the officer, its only now asking for the Deposit, an my mum had been in Hospital for nearly a month ,they never called to see how she is , an when they poped over last week , she said the baby had been in hospital , thats why she never come over , i said so did she lose her head is that why she never even called .

    My parents allways treated her like she was there child , not granchild,at last they now know how it feels .

    My parents got invited to the wedding an my Granddaughter Blessing , not me on either occasion.

    So i texted her telling her she wont be getting my Bungalow an iv changed my will , i said my my Granchildren will get the money , but im going to have it put in a trust so she can't get her hands on it an they wont be able to have all of it at once .that will teach her to be nasty .xx

  • Hijacquijarman

    Good for you I am really pleased that you have done that her. Good on you. That will teach her sometimes it makes you wonder if they stay around for the money !!!!!! I have been thinking along the same lines. I have five houses and four of them I rent out and I live in a lovely house. So maybe she took stock when she came over for the summer holiday and Christmas not last year the year before. Also I have some nice jewellery and I will make sure that I sell all my jewellery in the future. I don't want her to have a bloody thing off mine. As for what is left I will leave something to my grandson and like you he will only get so much every few years until his share has gone. It's good that you have made her aware of this as she would never thank you for it anyway. In saying that neither would mine. I said to her when she was here in the summer holiday there is some really nice bits here so make sure my son does not throw them out and her answer to me was write a list and she walked out the room. I thought to myself how rude can you get. I will write a list okay it will be to HER ( NOTHING. ) πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ Believe it or not my son is a really nice person but a bit of a temper but nice all the same And he will have to suffer because of her, well so be it. I have worked very hard all my life to make sure that he will be okay when I am gone and look what he's doing now. As for the Asian ladie Let her know that if she has no time for you, you have no time for her. I really don't understand this type of woman. I got on really well with both my mother-in-laws. I'd let her know that if she has no time for you, you have no time for her. I really don't understand this type of woman. I got on really well with both my both my mother-in-laws. I could never be rude to either one of them. It just goes to show at the Eire today is very different type off people. Rude rude and more rude. As for your parents maybe now they will see their true colours and not before time after all what you have gone through with the police and everything. Always remember one thing what goes around comes around. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ I wish you well and one day they will see what a lovely person you are and they may need you first I would say before you need them. Take good care of yourself. Jan πŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€—xxπŸ‘πŸ‘

  • Thank you so much , if only , comes to my mind , her dad was 16yr older then me , he never had anything , i was the one that had my own home and my own Hair & Beauty Salon, which i sold to work from home as i fell pregnant on my Honeymoon , i just wished the Doctor who said i would never have Children , i would have gone on the pill , iv allways worked after she was old enough to understand i become a NVQ teacher in my own Training Company an then i manufacturerd my own nail products, an in the evenings i did all my Hairdressing customers , thats what made me ill , i worked 14 hrs a day 6 days a week , because he did get a good wage not enough to even pay the mortgage.Wouldn't it be lovely to get a glimpse of your life before we make big mistakes. I sold all my Jewellery when my husband left me , id been hit by a car giving a man CPR , he was saved then just as i was getting him out the way , a car hit me i went flying up in the air , now im on 47 tablets a day , i had a stoke an Heart attack 4 weeks after the accident, an 3months before that my husband had a massive heart attack in doors , i had to do CPR on him .then he walked out on me 18mth after my accident, i think he left cause i couldn't work anymore .life is strange, some people go through life with no problems , other people like our selves has massive problems with family an health.

    Just hope your son dosnt stay with your Daughter in law , you never know .Do me a Favour, if you hear from them , let her know all your money is going to Charity or send her an email stating you have done a new will an your son is not getting anything.

    You never know , she may leave him if she thinks he's not getting any inheritance. Don't tell his dad what you are going to do .

    Saying it on the phone sometimes dosnt allways register but seeing it in black an white dose.

    Your find out what her true colours are .With that amount of property's makes you a wealthy women , she may have allready known that when she met your husband or he could have told her before they got married, iv got a feeling about your Daughter in Law , people are so cleaver know a days and you can learn so much about someone on the internet . My parents own there property its worth about Β£400000, My Daughter knows she getting it ,she wont be botherd about mine because its only worth Β£220000,,. .

    Take care , Love & Huggs Jacqui xx.

    I don't allways come on here very often .if u want to email me privately.

    jacquijarman@msn.com.

  • Hi jacquijarman O my god love you really have put your life up for people. It sounds absolutely horrific what you have been through. My heart really goes out to you and women like you. I certainly will be doing something so she never gets one penny of mine. I have worked extremely hard all my life to be where I am today and she has only ever been a barmaid or a waitress. She tries to make out she is more important than she years. Poor sod and so sad to. I could never make myself out to be something that I wasn't. Who is she trying to kid. I can now see why you are the way you are and I certainly do not blame you one bit. I think I would be worse than you if I have gone through all of that and for what I asked myself. None of them and I mean none of them are worth it. I will email you tomorrow as tonight I have just had an injection for carpal tunnel and my wrist is killing me. Take care love and I will speak with you tomorrow. Jan πŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ˜˜πŸ˜˜xxx

  • Its a very long road that has no turning. Your Grandson will no doubt ask his Father about his Grandparents one day. Memories will be stirred and things can change. have you always sent your Grandson and Son a birthday card etc. Nothing more and it will probably be returned but it shows a contact. His wife obviously didn't like you from the beginning and that could well be jealousy about your closeness then. There could be other reasons and we don't know what it is. If silence is always returned with silence then nothing wil change. Forgiveness and kindness are need if ever your son does contact you not revenge or anger and all the things you must be feeling. There is no law that says Parents and Children are to get along it is always in the way they are brought up. If revenge is meted out then it will only get worse. If you start a journal to be given to your son after your death about your life with him and now without him he will have a clear picture of what has happened for you both. If you go to family weddings, funerals and gatherings of any sort write about it and add photographs of family so that he can see what you family has been like. I know it does nothing for the reconciliation but your voice will be heard even if it never happens. Don't fill it will spite or self pity. Fill it with love and times missed by you both. In your Grandson you Son will see himself, You and his wife in some ways or habits. It does come out in children from the genes. His eyes may become clearer in the sort of woman he has married or they may not. At some time there may be a need in him to know about you and what has gone on for you. When that time comes maybe it will be your journal that says all you need to say and he can read it for himself. His wife would destroy it so just say it is ongoing but this is as far as life has brought you. Do look beyond this time or you will never experience joy and happiness again because this will eat you up like a cancer and you will be bitter. Things will be twisted and not as they actually are. Get out and about and build a life for yourself. You need to see a grief counsellor to explore you feelings of loss since this has happened. That will be like a pressure valve being opened and the steam and pressure coming out. You will feel a little better then. Your counsellor will help you build into your life your own coping strategies. Make a lot of new friends and don't envy anything they have in relationships just go ahead and make some new ones of your own. Be Positive and look at what you have in life not what you think you should have. Sit in gardens among trees and flowers they help heal to. Life can be good again just go out to look for it. You find it in the most unexpected places. xxxxxxx

  • Hi thankful thank you so much for your reply. That has really given me something to think about. It is really good when someone can see it from the other perspective and things you can put into place. I will actually go and get a journal that together then the time that we have missed out together he will be able to see things that I have done in my life since he was not there I really appreciate you putting that altogether for me. It will now help to put my mind more on to doing that than sitting everyday thinking about my son and grandson with no can't contact what's so ever. I truly wish you well my friend and take good care of yourself. Jan πŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€—xxx

  • How do nice men fall for such mean manipulative women? It is baffling. The hurt these women cause and the men just let it happen. I guess they just want to make them happy and are too nice to put their foot down when it counts.

    I know men whose partners, cannot allow anyone but themselves to have the lime light. Very toxic. One guy tells his partner he's working overtime when actually he is visiting his daughter and family. He dare not tell the truth. If he is away from home it is work, because work is legitimate and spending time with family and friends is NOT! Wonder what would happen when she finds out how often and easily he has lied?

    We bystanders can do nothing except maybe be there when or if it explodes. It is their choice. No amount of straight talking seems to help.

    Imagine being a Dad and being told by your grown up kids your relationship is abusive and toxic and they are getting hurt, and still allowing the relationship to continue unchanged? These women are damaged but hold tremendous power over these men. The men allow these women to hurt everyone they love and still say and do nothing to stop it. How ever passively, they are agreeing to that, by staying and doing nothing. Until the men wake up and decide they wont live like that, they will stay stuck living a half life.

    Those who care about these men need to resign themselves to their choice and try to detach from the pain these women want to cause. You know that without her influence, he was a decent guy and much of that is down to you.

    Try not to feel sad for yourself. And try not to be bitter. You and your son have been unlucky. I'd rather be nice with no flowers, than infected with bitterness and having to live with my mean heart.

  • HiAl10

    O my God this is so true. I had to read your post three times and it really made a lot of sense to me. So maybe my son is doing the same thing. I know there is no contact with me on him. Maybe he is half afraid of losing her. So he says things and does things to keep the peace. However I know my son can be very stubborn and he is upset with me because I shouted back at her and I know the timing was very wrong. But I just snapped because I could not take any more and I was the loser because now I don't hear from him or see my little grandson. But you are so correct what you are saying. I believe that there could be a lot of men Out there that does exactly the same. Just maybe one day he will contact me again and I know my son he will tell me the truth and what's been going on. I would like to thank you again for your post it has made me realise and look at things differently. I wish you well and take good care of yourself my friend. Jan πŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€—xxx

  • You're welcome.

    You are not the first loved one to snap and be punished for it! It is such a classic move as to almost be part of a cunning plan. Even the best people can snap under pressure. (Oh the shame!) These women seems to be master of applying the right subtle pressure and shaming and punishing those who snap. It really is bad luck for you and your son.

  • Hi Al10 That is so true and there little plan can back fire one day. We have a saying in my family, he who laughs last laughs the longest. πŸ‘πŸ˜ I truly wish you as well as you can be. Take good care of yourself. Jan πŸ€—πŸ€—xx

  • Sorry Jan101 I sent my post to you prematurely, my taped together fingers with the spasms are doing their own thing today!!

    I wanted to say that it's not easy when you miss your loved one, it eats away at you, your health and your life.

    I lost my only son in an accident and I still smell the freesias he gave me every week on 'Mother's Day', yet sadly they are not there ... sadly 'mothers day' is not always a happy day ☹️

    Again a special hug for a special ladyπŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€—

    Love Kitty 🐱

  • Kitty55 I am truly sorry to hear that you lost your son. Mother's Day must be a one of the very sad time for you and so many other days also. My heart really goes out to you. I could not begin to imagine if my son was not there somewhere. This has made me realise that what is happening is absolutely stupid. I am going to send him a message just to see if he will contact me. I will just write I love you I miss you always. Because sometimes the least said the better. Maybe he will reply I don't know. If not I'm going to make a Journal of the time that we have not been together one day he can see and read about things I have been doing. However I hope it does not come to that I hope he answers my message. My heart goes out to you I am sending you a massive big hug. Take good care of yourself and I wish you well my friend. Jan πŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€—β€οΈβ€οΈXxxxxxx

  • So sorry jan101 you had s bad day yesterday I had a very similar one I have 4 children only one who lives locally was close to all of the growing up my eldest is now married and my first grandchild was born last September he was christened yesterday but I couldn't make it as it was up north and with lots of issues at the moment meant I couldn't go. I had no card or messages from 3 of them just my daughter who lives locally bothered she took me out for dinner so I am lucky there but my youngest son kicked off a few weeks ago when visiting briefly tried to kick my door in and just lost his temper big time which I thought he now had under control don't get me wrong he has never been in any trouble or had fights etc he just has a temper which he has lost to me before and his dad. Seems I am the one who always gets it now though. My other son turns out went to the christening as I had a message from his girlfriend saying she would send me photos but so far nothing. It was a very upsetting day and I totally understand how you felt. Sending you a big hug πŸ€— xx

  • Hi Jackie4ball it is really sad that our children grow up and then married or live with people who are not very nice. My son also has a temper and sometimes you see that first before the person. So I understand when you say your son has a temper. It must have upset you when he kicked your door in. I hope you had a Word with him because he should not of done that to your door. I am hoping that maybe my son will put this all behind him and start talking to me again. I know I am now on my own because so many people here have told me about your children also. The try our best I do what we can for them and try to put them on the right road. We can do any more than that. I would never of done this to my parents as I have so much respect for them both. But the children of today Can be so different. I truly wish you well and take good care of yourself. Jan πŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€—xxx

  • So true Jan101 my youngest son has just got engaged to a Hindu girl or should I say lady as she is 34 my son is 27 and I know he wouldn't have behaved like that if she was with him as they have such high regard for parents and a lot of respect. My eldest has been quite selfish for a number of years now but when they were expecting he said he wanted me included in my grandsons life I saw him mid December and have had no photos or calls or anything since and yet my parents he calls every week and sends me mum pictures then my mum says to me have I seen this picture or that picture he has sent and that is now putting a strain on my relationship with my parents I would never be rude to them or lose my temper with them etc. Made sure my mum had a card and a bouquet of flowers and my children have all been brought up the same so why they couldn't send a card at least or even a text message or something. Last time they came down they saw my parents but didn't even tell me they were down I found out when they posted pictures on Facebook of them all on the beach and I made a comment saying it would have been nice to have seen my grandson and his wife sent me a private message saying she had removed my comment as she didn't want my son upset by it!! It's just crazy. My daughter is the only one that bothers at all. I don't think they realise how much it hurts if I had been a parent who didn't care about them or for them etc. I could understand it but they never ever wanted for anything. I guess it's just the way things are now. Hope you are having a good day today we must move on and wait until they need us again which I am sure at some point they will and we will be there as always xxx

  • I know how you feel but it's nothing to do with how good a mum you are but more to do with life choices our children make i had three children and two have gone there own way i blamed my self for a long time but when you know you have done all you can it hurt less to just let them go and they will come back when the have learned that life is sings and roundabout and not just full of me me me you would be surprised just how meny people are in the same situation we must have spoilt them too much

  • Hi Junebee I think you're right maybe we did spoil them too much I know I just might of done that. But at the time they are your world and your precious little child. If so your child matter no matter how old they are. Maybe this is my punishment for giving him too much, who knows. I have decided to let him go and carry on with his own life and then maybe I won't hurt so much. It's not easy but I will do my best. I truly wish you all the best take good care of yourself. Jan πŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€—xxx

  • Hi im Jane & I feel so sorry for you but the same thing is happening to me. I have 4 sons with families & they both have wives with the same attitude, but one of my son's have 6 children aged from 2yrs to 16 they live round the corner from me & she won't let any of them see us or speak to us. They all walk past every day for school /nursery. We haven't been able to have contact since August last year. My other son got married to he's sly one & he has a beautiful 15yrs old daughter from last partner &Caitlyn my granddaughter won't come to visit her dad because of his wife. Caitlyn knows his wife made my son stop the payments for her upbringing because my son lost his job. She won't or frightened to visit me in case they find out she's been to me. She used to sleep 4 days a week upto him meeting her 3yrs ago. I've been heartbroken but when he got married 3rd March my other son was there with his wife and kids, one of the kids 6yrs old sneaked over to me &my husband wrapped his arms around me &said I love you nanny Jane but don't tell my mum I have been to see you, I told him I would always love you &the others always &forever he said the same to Ken. It felt like winning the lottery &better. I know my son's love me as I'm sure yours loves you & little grandson as I know that my grandkids love us &they'll grow up one day & realise how selfish their mum was. God will pay her back as they say one day &she will need you one day. We just have to sit &wait my friend. I wish you good luck with the future, maybe she'll have a heart melt & let you see the little one. By for now &take care xx

  • Hi Jane I i'm so happy for you that your little grandchild came over to you do you hear them words I love you nan it means the world to you just for little words and effect it can have on you. One day maybe one day I will hear the same I truly wish that they will come soon. I can only live in hope. It's hard for me because my little grandson was only 18 months old when this all happened so he will not remember me and if he sees me later on in life I will probably be a stranger to him. It breaks my heart because I would've given my little grandson so much love. Maybe one day my son will realise this and see what his son is missing out on. These things are all sent to test us. If This goes on for too long then I'm afraid to say my son will be the loser. You give them everything and more and all the love they need and then they marry girls like her. I hope one day he will wake up and see what he has. I truly wish you well and good take care. Jan πŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€—xxx

  • You too lovee chin up & take care &remember you are the better &most caring person in this situation xx

  • Thank you love that is very kind of you say so. Take good care. Jan xxx

  • You too Jan, God Bless xx

  • I wonder did your Son know it was Mothers day if you live abroad they have it on different dates.

    It happened to me once my son was in Australia.

    Kind regards

    Pippajo

  • Hi Pippajo I am afraid to say yes he knows when Mother's Day is he sends flowers and a card last year. His mother in law also live so there and her other daughter and they always celebrate Mother's Day. So I'm afraid to say he did not want to do anything for Mother's Day unfortunately. It makes me very sad after all we have been very close all of his life and now this has happened with her coming into her family. I truly wish you well and take good care. Jan πŸ€—πŸ€—xxx

  • Maybe you should contact your son and see if he wants any kind of relationship with you? Explain to him what has happened....you could just agree to disagree about your daughter in law....? I hope things get better for you

  • Hi thank you so much for your reply. I have already tried and he did not reply to me so I think that he is still upset with me for speaking up for myself. I just could not take anymore from her. She really is not a nice woman. I truly hope that you are feeling as well as you can be. Take good care of yourself. Jan πŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€—xxx

  • Hey Jan, that's awful. He will come back to you......I'm sure!

  • Hi Silmarillion thank you I do hope so. I truly wish you as well as you can be. Take good care of yourself. Jan πŸ€—πŸ€—xx

  • And you look after yourself too.....

  • That's really sad..I have one son, he's only 12 but it's just me and him. This scares me, the idea of someone being so awful and him siding with her. That must really hurt.

    I'm sure he'll see through her at some point, he sounds lovely.

  • Hi Martinigirl

    Thank you. I truly hope so one day. You truly never know the type of woman that they are going to meet. I have the nasty daughter in law from hell. There is nothing I can do I have try so hard. I spent hundreds of pounds on her for her Christmas and a few days later she told my son a blatant lie that I said I want my home back to myself and I have never said that in my life. How could she do that after I tried to be so kind to her but that is nothing to what she has done over the 2 years she has been with him. My son is so wrapped up in her he thinks it's all me. But I have had enough and gave her what she wanted my son and I not to speak. She will regret it one day. Now I am not in the equation maybe my son will see what she is truly like. I truly wish that one day your son meets a really lovely girl. Take good care of yourself. Jan xxx

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