GP telling me to get on with life

i attended the surgery this week for results of an xray id had . i told the gp i was feeling really low and in so much pain and not sleeeping .he replied that he has to go to work with pain and has learned to live with it . he wouldnt prescribe me anti depressants as they dont make me feel any different but suggested i had therapy to talk through what is making me feel like this . BANG MY HEAD AGAINST A BRICK WALL !!!! ive just told you you idiot ! so i am booked in to see a psyco what ever . and pain clinic beg march where i am to be "taught" how to control and live with the pain using relaxation and discuss with other sufferers . i will give it a try as i will do anything to be able to live instead of exist . i know theres no magic pill or wand but why cant we, with constant pain be believed instead of being thought of as whimps. ive worked hard all my adult life caring for others working long split shifts from early morning to late . ive brought a family up and then cared for my grandchildren . my pain is REAL . and debilitating and life changing . im 62 and this is not what i had planned for . as you imagine its one of my bad days today . 5 nights on trot with no proper sleep .cant get comfy in bed / chair . wherever . tramadol is the drug at the moment again for me. have done the rounds of all the meds gp prescibe . none work . so zombie time with tramadol for the time being . thanks to all you that have read this all to the end . i hope someone can get comfort in knowing that they have same problems as me and to know they arent going insane .

21 Replies

  • Your not going insane!!I I am not a Dr. but sounds like I may as smart if not smarter than the one you are seeing.I hate the fact of people made to seem like they have to prove something because it can't be seen with eye.Ooohhhhh it makes me angry.Hope things get better for you (soon)!!!😊

  • thank you x

  • Is It possible for you to see another Doctor at your surgery , I think the one you are seeng needs to go back to wherever he trained and learn how to talk to his patients, some Drs are so arrogant it's unbelievable, I do feel for you, half the battle with fybro is trying to get Drs to understand how you are feeling when they don't it's so disheartening, Hope the physio helps you, and that you can get to see a doctor who at least tries to understand your pain, take care

  • ive seen all four gps at my surgery and each one about the same . thanks for imput x

  • Can you move to a new GP, the one you saw sounds like he/she is in competition for who is in most pain. I will say though that CBT did help me come to terms with illness, like most of us you have gone from an active life to having to learn a new way of coping and that doesn't come naturally . Lou xx

  • Oh my I could have written the post lol. I went to docs Friday had same response however I asked to go to pain clinic after suffering 15 years ... And was refused !!! She wants me to try other things first ... New doc as recently moved house obviously not read notes like you I've tried absolutely every pill and potion on offer with virtually no relief! I went to see my oesteopath on Friday find in a couple of days will be some relief but at mo in agony. However im NOT going to be defeated and remain on a mission to get a cure at the best or at least some relief. Hugs

  • thank you x

  • So sorry to read your post. You would think that if he has to go to work with pain he would be more sympathetic but there is pain and then there is painnnnnnnnnnn!!!! I worked for years with bad back pain but this overall ache and grinding pain is completely different. I can commiserate as I am propped up in bed as unable to sit in the chair as I can't get comfy.

    it is terrible when you can't rest as I was awake all night again last night it is rare I get more than an hour but last night was the pits it makes you feel so low in the day.

    I think the majority of us seem to be the same having held down responsible jobs and then to get to the stage where even small things exhaust you and every movement some days is agony is very hard to take.

    Do hope that the Pain Clinic benefits you. Perhaps being able to talk face to face with others who hopefully will understand your pain as they are in the same boat will help.

    Take care hope you have a better night.x

  • thank you x

  • Hi there

    I agree with Arymtrep. Is there a different GP you could see at your Surgery? If not, can you change to a different Surgery?

    You may find the talking therapy is in fact CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) and you will see a psychologist for that. Many people on the forum have in fact found CBT very helpful.

    May I ask whether you take your Tramadol regularly? If you take it at the same time each day, after about a week, that zombie feeling will in fact wear off.

    Good luck with the psychologist (or maybe you've been referred to a psychiatrist, although I doubt it, if your GP would not give you antidepressants).

    Anyway, I am not a doctor, just a fellow sufferer and speaking from experience of having had Fibro for over 30 years.

    Wishing you calmness and peace

    Lu xx

    Volunteer Admin

  • thank you x

  • Hi Goldilocks. you have my sympathies on all fronts and yes some Docs are the pits. think it reflects the 'top down' ethos from the Govt. of balance sheet medicine and policy that dictates attitudes & values. re: the Fibro pain, i was prescribed Nortripyline for Corticochondritis and it helped measuarbly with my Fibro. pain.

  • Get rid of that judgemental DOCTOR...Find a new one disgusting behaviour....power making him sour....i wouldnot have been spoken too like that....i can image ...dont say it...but i know these doctors play god.....get rid my advice and quick..ive a lovely doctor so lovely and he always listensxxxx

  • So sorry you're having such an awful time. I recognise your frustration having been through similar myself for sooooooo long.

    When I was finally diagnosed by a Rheumatologist, I finally gained access to various NHS services including the pain clinic. It was great. Finally people knew what I was going through and listened. Above all I was granted access to different meds and also acupuncture. It really helped. One of the things I was advised to do was to use a tens m/c for the pain. If it works on you its such a relief! I also had access to physiotherapy and then hydrotherapy. Both helped tremendously and got me back to feeling more 'normal' than I had done for a long, long while. I never did the talking therapy as I didn't feel that it would help any more than other things had.

    If you can get to a pain clinic and access physio and hydro, perhaps also acupuncture it may help.

    The specialist had talked about a balanced approach from various perspectives - if anything may help I will always try it. You never know what will work and different things work for different people.

    It had taken years and years to get the GP to listen. The third GP I saw after some 10 years finally took me seriously, did so many tests to eliminate other possibilities, before referral. When the specialist also took me seriously, I could barely speak. The relief was amazing.

    The one thing they haven't been able to help wth is the sleep problem. I am trying to deal with this myself with all sorts of different things. I don't want sleeping pills. I use 5HTP (magnesium) which helps along with Bach Rescue Remedy Night and warm milk. The meds I'm on help - Gabbapentin. I've been taken off Naproxen (painkillers) as I've had a stomach bleed possibly caused by the pain killers - s**s law! What is supposed to help in one way damages in another!

    I go up and down like everyone, but I now have better strategies and resilience for dealing with my pains than I ever did before.

    Good luck. I hope things improve for you, whatever you try.

    Best wishes


  • i do use tens machine but gives no relief at all . only heat soothes . but then i get too hot as i cant stand extremes of heat / cold . cant win lol

  • Iv said this loads The docters are here for us all but unless you got Fibro your self how can they know what it really feels like They don't! X

  • My sister asked one of our gps about fibromyalgia and it said there was no such thing it is all in there head and now i make sure if i need to see a gp i dont see him.

  • Hi goldilocks54

    I am so genuinely sorry to read this and I sincerely hope that your pain management goes well for you. It is possible that they could write to your GP with recommendations for treatments? Your GP would have a difficult time refusing you if this were to happen? I want to genuinely and sincerely wish you all the best of luck.

    All my hopes and dreams for you


  • Being spoken to like that is unforgivable and unprofessional as well and makes you just want to dismiss anything else that he says to you. I don't have chronic pain myself, barring a slipped disc at the moment that I hope is going to resolvable, but my husband has spinal stenosis and ME he's been through these therapy sessions as a group and a one to one basis and even though the physio annoyed him he ignored them and treated it as a chance to talk to others in our area that are going though similar things which he said helped a lot. The one on one sessions were limited but helped him on a more personal level and how he coped with his expectations and how it impacted the close family as well, so it helped us deal with living day to day and understanding each other which we had slightly put aside as it was hard enough doing the rounds of hospital/doctor appointments. He was initially sceptical but he has said at the end of it all even though it hasn't done anything to change his physical pain it has helped him deal with it in himself, I hope you find the support you need from them even if it isn't in the way you would expect it.

  • It's as if you are talking about Me I have months on end of feeling like that and I don't know what to say to make it better for you. There are thousands of us who would never have thought we could feel so rotten and so low. Very slowly the mood seems to lift and positive thoughts replace the dark ones.I like you have worked very hard bringing up my family and at one point had 3 jobs for a whole year

    Had to give up work last year as I couldn't manage anymore and seemed to be off sick more than I was at work.

    Now I just get through each day as best as I can,sleep when I have too ( most afternoons) and hope for a bit of sunshine to raise our spirits a bit.

    Have been medically retired and only have a very small pension, all rainy day money has now gone and live from month to month.

    At the end of the day I can't worry about things any more,it is what it is and that's that.

    Pain and fatigue are enough to deal with and we do the best we can.

    Love and hugs to everyone and thank you so so much for not only caring but sharing with everyone all advice,and help for all of us.....xxxxxxxx

  • i could have wrote this too as its just about whats happened to me . i would love to go away abroad like i used to do as the warmer weather makes my life bearable but cant cope with the airport waiting around the seats on the plane and the time spent sat down . i went for a swim yesterday after mother n baby session when water is warmer and enjoyed it . this morning i can barely move and racked with pain . so my plan for today is a little walk , then relax this afternoon . we arent lazy are we ? we do try to live "happy exciting normal " lives but the hill gets steeper . thanks for imput x

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