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Fibromyalgia Action UK
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Questions about my life and future? Please read and help me?

hi all i'm looking for some advice. I was working as a T.A two days a week at high school, but two days before the school closed for the school holidays I was told they didn't have any hours for me in September! Anyway they offered me Five mornings (3 hours each morning} at a junior school working with a primary school, and I would need to learn Makaton and manuall handling with the child in question.. During the school holidays I met the childs mother and introduced myself. She said I wouldn't be with her child as I didn't have any experience and had heard that I had been off work a lot with my fb. I still don't know whats happening next week at work!! Or what to do . I need to phone work and ask tomorrow. But what do I do?

honestly I cant see me been able to do the job and

im waiting to go into hospital to have an operation on my shoulder soon, and I haven't told work!

I support my 15 year old son who is part time at school as he's been suffering with depression.

I don't get any support or benefits as im too well and not ill enough !!

Should I tell work about my shoulder?

In reality I cant work AND look after my family and house

Ive tried once for DLA and blue badge but got refused, should I try again? is it worth it? can I ask my gp something which would help?

6 Replies

God how are you surviving you are not super women and all I know is that if you can work 16 hours a week the gov will bump up you money so you have at least a minimum full wage. It must be terrible for you right now and im so sorry to her this. Citizens advice are a wonderful advocate for human rights and can help support you with good advice and where and how to look and probably support you through any process. Your doctor may also be able to help here too with advice or support in some way but I think they are pretty limited to how much they can. You know is a fine line between how ill you have to be before you benefit from work or not to especially with a stress related illness as some stresses are good to work with like relationships the home front money and work you really need to talk to citizens advice and see what's out there. About the dla do you have any medical evidence for the dla mobility etc. they need that they are so busy culling the E S A and D L A claims that its not the easy to get but if you have medical needs maybe your doctor can support you there well wish I had more positive things I could say but alas not. well im virtually really tired stressed hurting pretty much all over and have to walk my dog on my scooter and not to mention moving home this week or next. ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh :(((((( stress stress but then aaaaaaaahhhhhh :)))))) no more stairs hooray no more extra bedroom tax so real nice any way hope you find your answers soon gentle hugs fibro friend. oh and buy the way your know I don't know anyone except my two year old granddaughter who isn't depress I think its the governments fault lol.


So agree with what you say royal spec, but please be aware that you can only work UP TO 16 hours a week and still get benefits. Once you actually do the 16, you're down for nowt!!


OMG sorry forgot about esa and permitted hours please disregard

that bit :/


EI was only wworking 12 and IFI. do/can do the new job ill only be doing 15 !


Hi Mari. I'm sorry about everything you're going through. It isn't easy being worried about being able to work and caring for your family. Would the mornings be any good? It would be shorter days for you, if it would fit in with caring for your son that is? Would you be able to work with others until your shoulder is better after the surgery?

I don't know about benefits, but would you be eligible for carers allowance for looking after your son?

Make an appointment to see your GP about your worries. In the morning, hopefully you're asleep just now, phone your new school and speak with the head, or whoever oversees the child you're due to help. One step at a time.

I understand how you feel and all the uncertainty and I wish I could help more. Take one day at a time, do what you can when you can.

Stay strong.

Is x


Don't know if this helps but when I was working part time (as a TA too!) I was only doing 12 hours a week and this was topped with child tax credit. If you're a single parent you can claim it. Carers allowance may be an option if your son has a condition that requires your help beyond that which is needed by another child of that age (or something like that, I have to go through all of it for my son, who recieves DLA and I get carers because of that. Can you claim DLA for your son? If he is entitled to even a low rate care you may get extra help financially elsewhere. it's a bit of minefield. I get additional financial support because of my sons disability, like a disabled premium. And because I am a carer I have my NI contributions paid for and do not have to work. Might be worth speaking to either CAB or go to your local childrens centre and ask if they have a benefits specialist or someone who can give advice about disability etc. Always worth having someone like that helping you do claims for yourself or your children as it ensures nothing is missed.

Good luck with work. If the mother is suggesting you aren't capable I wouldn't worry too much. I didn't get on with one of the mothers of a child I supported. I actually thought she was a terrible mum (never said that of course) and I always insisted on discipline at school, which wasn't backed up at home. Made things tricky. Bygones.

If you do not think you can support this child then you need to be honest and speak to the head of the school. It's possible another TA would be willing. Also you have to recieve specialist training to do the hands on part of the job or you can be held liable. This should have been sorted by the school prior to your starting the job so that, should the need arise you are covered. Whatever you do do not become hands on without the training. It can cost you your job, which is unfair but worse still, the parents can sue you for handling their child.



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