I moved into my flat in mid July and have been trying to get things done since then, almost finished. My shed is being delivered and built as we speak, one of my neighbours has just screamed abuse at me and threatened to "sort me out".

I phoned the police and they said they would send someone straight round but they've not appeared. I live on my own and am sitting here with my 3yr old granddaughter shaking like a leaf and terrified of what might happen next. Anyone any advice on how to settle my nerves, I'm already on anti depressants and had to take extra painkillers.

14 Replies

  • Do not under any circumstances approach this person, don't talk back either. Give them nothing to fuel this behaviour. Leave it to the authorities to deal with. Do not allow any family member to act on you behalf either it will be seen as a two way thing and will not be dealt with. Lou xxx

  • Thank you, I have had the police round now and they have gone to speak to her. There were also 2 witnesses the police spoke too and the police said I did nothing wrong. If she does do anything I just have to call them immediately and they will deal with her. Unfortunately has made Fibro pain skyrocket.

  • Oh my I am so sorry to hear this it must have been so frightening been on your own.

    was she drunk or did she disagree with you having a shed? What ever it was threatening you with violence was wrong. I hope you have heard the last from her.Take care

    Love Mo xx

  • She wasn't drunk, the police said it is jealousy but I can't see what she has to be jealous of - she's more than welcome to my Fibro if she wants that but truly there is no helping people who are ignorant

  • I'm so sorry you have had to go through this and I know how things like this can make our fibro flare like mad and I really hope that it doesn't last for too long for you.

    I'm pleased that the police came and are now aware of your problem neighbour (they may well already have had experience with her previously) and do rest assured that they will come to your rescue should such a thing ever happen again, though I hope very very much that it doesn't.

    I'm sending you huge amounts of positive healing and soothing vibes to you 😊😊

    Foggy x

  • I am so sorry time hear you have had to experience that at what should be a good time. Good that police came round and took it seriously. Not that you want to think about it but get a little notebook and write it all down so that in case anything similar were to happen again you will have all details to hand as fibro Will make you forget. Being scared like that is awful for anybody but with our problems it's like shaking a bottle of fibromyalgia pop and makes it fizz up all over and blow the top leaving with very little nice and no fizz. Realize you don't and won't have to put up with that kind of abuse, the police will be there if you need and that you need to take it easy until fibro flare calm's down. Take good care of yourself and remember there are a lot of folk on here who do care about you so you're not on your own.

    Hugs and calm caring thoughts on the way.

    Effie xx

  • I am so sorry this happened! No surprise it made your fibro flare. One of the theories of fibro is that we're stuck in the "fight or flight" response, so anything that triggers that for real just puts it through the roof! I too live alone and have a crazy-ass neighbor, though she's never threatened violence. If I'm outside when she comes out of her house, I go in. I prefer avoidance to confrontation, since I feel that confrontation will just make things worse and resolve nothing. She does not like a tree I have in my front yard, and has suggested I move it over!?! The trunk is 3 feet thick, and this is not the only crazy-sounding suggestion she's made. She's elderly and I think probably has mental problems, but I'm not able to solve them!

    One thing I do is picture my guardian angel surrounding me with a protective ball of light. If I feel like it, I include my house, property, etc. If nothing else, this makes me feel safer and so reduces my stress. I also write things down, which enables me to quit going over and over them in my head, and that reduces my stress too. Hugs and healing to you!

  • How horrible, glad police have been and really hope this is the only occasion it happens. Suggest you do keep a record, although it not a good thought it couldn't do any harm if you need to call police again. X

  • Oh my I hope everything will calm down that police are involved! Please take care of yourself !!

  • I am so genuinely sorry to read of the abuse that you have been subjected too and it must be awful for you. I think that you have already been given some wonderful advice, as not to talk to her or get involved and ring the police. Please take care of yourself.

    All my hopes and dreams for you


  • How stressful.once inside your front door that is your cocoon just try to avoid this person if you can .could be she has mental problems lonely trying to get attention (the wrong way!) .

    Special hugs for you

  • Is the flat private rental or Housing Association, by any chance? If it is Housing Association you could complain to them, if others have been verbally abused by this person, she can be given an ASBO, or whatever the new name for these things is. Don't live in fear of her, just try to ignore her, but if she continues, she can be eveicted, especially if she has abused others.

  • Thanks, it is council housing and I have raised a complaint with them, by the way I was spoken to by the council it would appear that they are aware of her behaviour. She knows that anything she does will be reported to the police who advised she would be arrested and charges brought against her. She will also be charged with disability descrimination as what she is doing is bullying x

    Thanks to everyone for your words and advice of encouragement, it helped me sleep a little xx

  • Hello Scottish-piglet, Glad that you are trying to get settled and organised, and the shed is being put up,,,,,so to hear a nasty neighbour shouting such unnecessary things at you is not wanted.

    You did the right thing, and did nit quickly,,,sadly with things as they are the police will be there when they can,,,,please try not to shake,,,stay in and keeping the doors and windows locked,,,,have a cup of tea with your granddaughter and nice biscuit.

    Being frightened is a response to shock and you have your little precious with you, I would keep a note of what time, day and date, the first time and when you phoned, these will be good to have to show a picture of what has happened if it is needed in the future.

    Talk with your gp for something that will help you relax,,,,Diazepam is something that in tiny doses can help, if your gp is happy to prescribe it for you,,,and there are some more,,,,

    (Kalms at the chemist is said to help in these stressful times).

    Is your new flat, via a housing association? and is the nasty neighbours also? They might have a policy of bad neighbour actions, that is if you tell them they will take the matter up with them and deal with the situation, and mediate if possible,,,if it is a private let, then speak to your landlord or the letter agent, to see if they can help.

    You have done nothing wrong, and if you still are waiting, and still very frightened,,,ring the police again,,and ask for a time when they will call to you, also ask them for a reference number to go with your call,,and keep this in the notes,,,,sadly there are some people who go out of their way to cause upset,,,keep these notes to hand with day, date, times and police reference numbers when you speak with them,,,it will give them a good picture of the situation.

    I hope this helps, everybody hopes for good things when they move,,,,we are all here for you,,,,try and rest and enjoy being with your little precious,,,,,ttfn from Karen.

You may also like...