So I went on social media earlier on tonight and read on a friends page that a 26 year old had taken her life, the reason in her letter was nobody believed how much pain she was in due to her Fibromyalgia. You see again because those around her couldn't see it they thought she was putting it on. Very sad...
Taken own life....: So I went on social... - Fibromyalgia Acti...
Taken own life....
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lrain
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70 Replies
•
Hi Irain
I have just read your post with so much pain and sadness as sooner or later this sort of thing was going to happen. It is so heartbreaking that such a young girl has found the need to commit the ultimate act as nobody believed her. I genuinely and sincerely find it so painful. Thank you so much for bringing this to our attention.
All my hopes and dreams for you, and the poor girls family
Ken x
I was so angry Ken when I read it, thinking of that poor young woman with no one to turn too. but like you said it was alway going to happen as it is still not fully understood by the medical profession so how can we expect everyday people to understand. I have had it 10 years and am still learning.
Thanks again Ken, I don't even know her name.. Just a post on a friends social media heart breaking.
Take care x
Hello Irain,
I'm so so sorry to hear your devastating news, about your friend's daughter and send condolences both to you and to her family. I know only too well the desperation that can come from people not believing how ill fibro can make you. 20 years ago I worked for a family as a PA/cook (in fact turned out to be do anything at all ! 😳) and for 12 years they totally dismissed everything I went through with my fibro. I can't tell you how demoralising and mentally abusive it was and I ended up thinking I really was going mad, so I really do understand and am so saddened by your news.
Sending positive healing and soothing vibes both to you and to the poor girl's parents 😔😔
Foggy x
Sending you hugs fibrofoggiest, you would think these days, people would be more sympathetic and understanding, but they seem to brush our illness under the carpet WHY because most of us try and get on without causing too much fuss !! Maybe we should scream or cry every time we hurt maybe then people would sit up and pay attention. Again we are too dignified and continue trying to get on the best we can. (rant over). Thank you for your positivity means alot 
Here in USA when you have fibromyalgia you and receive help from the government on medical needs you must see a behavioral therapist and a pain specialist to keep your mind and body examined to make progress and continue with assistance from the government. Just an FYI, Amy
• in reply toFibrofoggiest
Sending much healing thoughts to you Foggy x
I am so sorry , for your friend and your loss ,I hope people are taken to task over this ,and something comes out of it positive for her family , I am at a loss I must admit as to what as the pain and loss and regret they must all be feeling I don't think can be truly comprehended , perhaps the media might run with this and employers , the government, and the DWP might feel there callus treatment of her was partly responsible .and it might be brought up in the human rights case thats happening at the moment at The Hague ?
Again I am so sorry for your loss ,take care of yourself ,
Lots of hugs
Christina xx
Thanks, Christina, I am not sure what will happen, I asked if I was ok to share this one the website and they agreed, My first reaction was of anger and hurt. Now it's how do you prevent someone else going through this? The GP's and DWP need to understand what they are putting people through.
Thanks for your support. xx
how sad, the anguish the poor girl must have gone through and now the lifetime pain the family will suffer without their daughter. when will people listen. words fail me x
Couldn't put it better myself Dillydally1, x
Very sad!
I am following this community. But I myself doesn't know what is fibromyalgia. Can anybody explain to me what kind of illness it is. And what is the symptom to look out for. Thank you
• in reply toEdithharrison
Have a read of this it is the basics.
pinterest.com/pin/484207397...
fmauk.org is the forums mother site and there is a lot or use ful info on there.
If you need any more help just send a post and we will do our best to answer.
Sue
I can see that Mayrose has given you the link to the FMA UK website, so I will juts wish you all the best of luck.
All my hopes and dreams for you
Ken
So sad, so very sad.
Very sad
God Bless her and her family, absolutely heartbreaking. Best wishes
God bless her Irain how tragic and sad this is, may she rest in peace now xx
Before you all condone a person of any crime, wait to hear their story.. Mass condemnation isn't fair and will end up twisted like chinese whispers... Just maybe she had other more deeper reasons for dying, not just the pain or the ignorance she had before her.? Just maybe Mum and possibly Dad had their own issues to confront? While we never expect anyone to take their own lives, some do take their life in very quiet discreet ways.. Unless the full story is put before you, from the person who died and those accused of any issues, is it best to say nothing?
Hannah21b• in reply to
Knowbody is condoning anyone but unless you have this condition it is hard to explain how this pain can take over your life, the pain is so hard to explain and you will try anything, any medication to help ease that pain and for some people nothing helps and as strong as we are that thought does go through your mind and if this young girl took her life because of the pain she was going through, I know a lot people who suffer with this condition may have had that same thought! It is so sad, for what ever reason this young girl felt she had to move on. Gobless her.
Well said Hannah !!!
I agree with you, Hannah21b and I have pointed my finger if you read my post I pointed it at GP's and DWP in general not her family as I believe if like mine they wanted the best for her and didn't know which way to turn. x
• in reply toHannah21b
I've had Fibromyalgia since 1994, also Crohn's disease, sacro-illuitis, dry eye, white finger, metatarsal feet, (big toe is smaller than small toe so no good to walk with) skin cancer, had 3 operations for bowel repair, and the list goes on. Edited By Admin
lrain• in reply to
As far as I am aware it has only gone on social media, I asked if I could post it on this fibro site, so that there was awareness not for my own gratification. What could anyone gain from such a loss is beyond me.
Fibrofoggiest• in reply to
Could I remind you kazzgirl of the rules of the forum which ask us to respect each other's opinion, I fear your controversial approach is hurting some who are already feeling saddened by the information contained in the post.
I am not in any way detracting from the genuine pain you are clearly in, but please also think of others in similar situations. I can assure you that no one here will be sending their condolences for their own self gratification !!
Foggy
TheAuthor• in reply to
Hi kazzgirl,
I hear what you are saying and where you are coming from and truth is a three edge sword. However, I do not feel that this thread is about condemnation I feel it is about sorrow and grief and the pain that we all suffer and the way that we can genuinely relate to the struggle that this poor girl went through.
I want to gneuinely and sincerely wish you all the best.
All my hopes and dreams for you
Ken
That is incredibly sad. I am so sorry for your friends loss. Words fail me.
I mean that could be me: 5 plus years of not being believed: pain clinic now unable to help me. I told her I was going to jump in front of a train went to station bt called a mate n was screaming n crying on phone.
This is my reality. Was depressed, anxious, bpd, PTSD before fibromyalgia and I get mugged off by everyone.
I am scared for the next appointment incase I'm deeply saddened n disappointed again,
Felt suicidal twice n acted on it in the last month.
So tired of being misunderstood by even the closest people it's so hard.
Wondered if we can set up a just giving page on behalf of this poor young girl and fibro awareness.
I understand completely and feel many of us lack support frm docs or family and will attempt to end our pain, an attempt may be successful.
I'm crying for her cos it could be me n it's just not fair. 😭
Jaja2014, my first emotion on reading social media was anger and hurt that she took such a valuable young life, It's now sadness, as I am upset and crying reading your post, I understand the pain you are in. All the people on the fibro wall know this pain and we are here to give you as much support as we can.
if you want me to give you my email address so you can talk to me if you have any desperation or feeling low then you have someone to reach out to who understands you, rather than sink lower.
Keep fighting as You are worth so much and when you are on the right medication will feel like you are able to function.
Sending you lots of hugs Lorraine. xx
Hi jaja2014
I genuinely and sincerely want to wish you all the best.
All my hopes and dreams for you
Ken
Jajah, I understand you. You can call me anytime and I will listen and share some of the hard times that I made it through and maybe we can come up with ideas to help those that are alone and at the lowest point.
So sad, it made me cry. X
On the outside people would not recognise how you are feeling, It is not something that is visible to others and so hard to explain. JaJa be strong, you are not alone. It is surprising how many people have this condition and yet so little being done (that i Know of) to research it. Does anyone know who or if research is being done to help the suffering?
It would give so many people at least a glimmer of hope for the future that someone is listening. (apart from you wonderful, strong people on here) x
There is research being done in alot of countries but all the findings need to be coordinated as findings are never as powerful if reported in isolation. There are so many in the medical profession who seem not to believe fibro is a genuine illness it makes it even more of a difficult task to get others to believe. So many of the symptoms are common to other illnesses that getting even a firm diagnosis is such a struggle and it is such a lottery to get the help required as it sees to vary so much from place to place.
My heart goes out to everyone in despair as if we are honest I am sure the majority of us would say we have sometimes got to the point where it has all seemed too much to fight but are lucky enough to have someone who believes in us and helps us to carry on.
Hopefully this site can help everyone and especially those who have no one else to turn to.x
The Mayo Clinic is one of the best hospitals in the United States. They have been studying fibromyalgia for over 30 years. They have recently started a new program a few years back that last a month for the patient and family visits. It is in Jacksonville, Florida and the patients stay in a Hotel right beside the hospital and each day the patient goes to the hospital at 7:30 and leaves at 5:30 and family members are encouraged to come only on the weekend and take classes to learn about what the patient has been going through what they are learning about fibromyalgia and themselves and what to expect when they get home. I remember my mom's visit she had a hard time hearing that her type A personality daughter would no longer be the same person. It was like they were shocked to hear that it was not going away. It was in front of them for so long and I guess they were not believing me. They have a follow-up that continues every 6 months. The website is mayoclinic.org/departments-... ... click on fibromyalgia It helped me. They are particular about choosing patients for the program there are several test and screenings before being accepted by the program. There is also a waiting list that was a year when I went. Lucky an opening came about and my test results bumped me up so I only waited a few months. I would highly recommend this program they accept insurance
Hi Irain
Sending peace to yourself x Sending much love healing to this young ladys family at this sad time. x
Thank you Omshanti x
Edited By Admin with fibro the money would come flooding in to the research companies to help us..
Fibrofoggiest• in reply to
Kazzgirl, I'm afraid I once again have to draw your attention to the rules of the forum where we are asked not to name or shame anyone, and particularly not political, could I suggest politely that you remove this last comment otherwise I will have to report you for breaking the rules.
Foggy
Such a sad post to read. Poor girl and her family. We all on here, and many others who have not found this website are suffering daily, no quality of life, in my case no self esteem and feeling useless. I just don't know what the answer is so that we get the recognition we so deserve. To have sunk so low that you feel you have no other option but to leave this earth is heartbreaking. I'm lost for words. Thank you for sharing if only to reiterate to all of us that on here we can reach out to each other.
Much love
Jo xx
Thank you Jo, x
So sad, poor girl x
Oh that is so sad, but I do know that feeling oh too well
. No one believes you and doctors cannot diagnos you or won't , they just try to tell you it all in your head. They make you feel worse about yourself when you leave their office. I know I don't wish this pain and problems on my self I want a life not live in this prison. Thanks for letting me get this feeling off my chest so thanks for listening to me
That is exactly what the forum is for dear ICIICI6, somewhere wher you can come and share and really be heard, understood and supported by the other members who know the truth of your condition.
Do feel free to come as often as you want for our support and assistance if we can possibly do so.
I'm sending you lots of positive, healing and strengthening vibes 😊😊
Foggy x
Thank you , just having a relapse week , scared I am heading for another stroke on top off everything else. The pressure in my head is building up so much it is making my jaw and ears hurt. Having funny feeling on my right side of my face mainly around my eye. Doctors got mad when I wouldn't stay last time for therapy so they say it's just old age spot on my brain. If that is so why all the CT scans on my brain every 3 months. Why thy said I have a anurisom on the brain then I don't. Just tired of being told I just need to see a psychologist I already see one. I feel like I am loosing me to all of this. Sorry for being so blue this week. Just need someone to talk to and cry.
Oh my dear, what a lot you have gone through and continue to do, I can understand why you need someone to talk to and to share what's happening to you.
I am wondering whether it might be possible for you to ask for a second opinion about the issue of a potential stroke or aneurysm - it doesn't make sense that they tell you there is one there and suddenly there isn't, so you need some clarification on this.
Please feel free to PM me and we can talk about this a little further, but know that I am sending you lots of positive healing and soothing vibes in the meantime 😊
Foggy x
Thank you I always need someone to talk to. Lost all my friends when I got sick n my mom passed away. My children and family doesn't really think I have problems because the doctors write me off therefore it is all in my head. I still have to work which is pretty hard most days but I push myself to go. What scares me the most is I have eye problems but I still have to drive 45 minutes to work and I can't see very well. I am so afraid I am going to kill someone in an accident.
But once again doctors don't care here in Missouri
Oh dear, you have been though a rough time, could I suggest you PM Regnofibro who also lives in the States, and knows far more about the health system out there.
Of course always come here too, if we can lift your spirits we will 😊😊
Foggy x
Yes thank you
I try not to say anything that way I'm not whining.
You're not whining at all my friend, and I still mean it that I would very happily talk to you further via PM😃😃😃
Foggy x
Any time that's what we are all here for, to help when we can, by listening and catching you when you fall. take care Lorraine x
oh dear that is so sad
Wow, Reading this post and the replies has given me some comfort (if that makes sense!). My condolences Irain, must have been a terrible shock and to everyone who's suffering, I'm thinking of you.xxx
I'm in the middle of the most relentless pain everywhere at the moment, which has also exacerbated my RLS, I feel wiped, incredibly down, useless, a moaning minny, over-dramatic and the rest! My Dad is over for a visit from Canada and I can just about muster a few hours of coherence before it all just gets too much. I know that by worrying so much about letting him down that I'm just making it worse but I feel in permanent state of apologies. Him and his wife are refreshingly understanding though, his wife's sister is a long time sufferer so that helps, but it's just another stark reminder of my limitations.
I think that everyone's pain reality is theirs to own and not for others to compare or judge. I have taught myself to meditate, I go to college 3hrs a week, I can find a positive in virtually any situation, but even with all that, I am struggling so bloody hard with this.
I want, if I may, comment on Kazzgirl's reply. Whether there was more going on in Irain's friends family life or not, is not ours to question nor is it our's to question the content of her letter. She was sad because of the disbelief she faced regarding her pain, a fact that most sufferers face daily. Although I have not got to that stage, I completely empathise with those who have. At times like this, surely Irain deserves some solace from this community, not a comparative medical sheet!
This forum has been my saviour on more than one occasion and I thank you all for that.
So sorry for the essay, only came on for a read so I didn't feel alone!!
Hugs to every last one of you. Kxx
kmc-cudsleepforaweek there are lots of lovely replies and just as many that show we are in the same boat. Thank you for your message of support x
I want to genuinely and sincerely wish you all the best.
All my hopes and dreams for you
Ken
How unutterably sad! My heart goes out to all the people the poor girl left behind. The scary thing is that it could have been any one of us. This rotten condition can leave you feeling so low and vulnerable that thoughtless comments that one would normally manage to rise above take on enormous significance, especially when uttered by someone who you expect to be supportive. I would imagine we've all been called upon to justify ourselves to friends and family who then seem to disbelieve us at one time or another just because the pain, fatigue and depression are invisible and can vary from minute to minute, let alone from day to day! I thank goodness for this forum and the loving support we give one another to help us through the times we feel low and misunderstood.
And, ICIICI6, never hold back from posting because you're concerned about whinging. I've certainly done my fair share of whinging, especially when I was newly diagnosed. The time will come when your horizons are brighter and you will be telling someone else to whinge away.
Love and light to you all xx
I hate to hear this. Sometimes the only time I don't feel pain is when I am asleep. But even that doesn't last long. I wish my extended family and friends understood like all of you do... "my fibromyalgia family". Sometimes one of any of your messages can help me through my day. I also enjoy giving feedback. It makes me feel like I am helping and it's so important to be needed and understood. I am across the world in USA but I feel that I have all of you here with me at anytime. Prayers to her family. I understand her lonlyness, I have been told by someone I love to please not call them and tell them what was hurting because there was nothing they could do about. This is someone that I love and understands my pain but does not want to hear about my pain all the time. That was hard to stop but now when I have a bad day I can always share with you and that feels nice. Amy
All my hopes and dreams for you Amy.
Sadly I doubt she is the first and won't be the last you just don't get to hear about it all the time. You can but just hope that she is pain free now and goes back and haunts the people that didn't beleive her.
But saying that this is a relatively new condition/disease/illness that15-20 years ago it was hardly heard off now it seems 1 in 10 suffer with it,
They need to do more research urgently into this I condition. In my small network of friends 4 of us have it, or something similar.
Mine seemed to have started after having gall bladder surgery, I am lucky that my husband understands, but I can see how depressing and konely it can be if no one believes you and you feel you have no one to turn to.
Thanks everybody great to have friends I can talk to and understands what I am going through.
Today is a better day still pain but I can still smile and go to work today.
Big hugs to all of you.
Thank you, everyone for you support, I understand it was hard hitting, it is hard listing the pain and the ailments when there are so many at one time, then getting people to believe you is a completely new bag of tricks.... It is not easy for anyone with an invisible disability, especially for someone younger. My heart goes out to her and her family and if anything positive comes out of this then let it be that you are NOT ALONE, we do believe your pain we live it, and GP's are catching up. What we have is REAL.
Again Thank you so much to each and everyone of you
Take care much love xx Lorraine xx
So difficult to read about such a young girl taking her own life, when most girls her age have dreams of getting married having kids etc etc. My prayers go out to her family and friends God bless them x
That is very sad, but also understandable. Can you tell me where I can find the article please? I'm not on Facebook. It didn't come up on Google. Thanks.
I am a spinal cord patient and was a senior pharmacy tech before I was forced to retire. I have a very bad case of Fibromyalgia. I have to take Oxycodone, Nortriptyline, Naproxen, Valium, and Tramadol. But at surgery time I had become a quadriplegic with 24 hours to live. Even with all the opiates that I take, the pain never dissipates. My heart goes out to the family. I also have to wear Bioness to walk and have felt like wanting to die after not sleeping for 27 hours. But we have to go on living. And now they have added Gabapentin at maximum dosage. (2400 mg daily)
I also lost 30 percent of my Neuro pathway, which is why I have to wear the bionic machines and take the Gabapentin, which is interchangeable with Pregabalin. For the person who asked what Fibromyalgia is....It is neural pain that consumes your entire body and is quite severe. Some diabetics get it in their feet. My diagnoses was the same as Christopher Reaves. My spinal column was crushing my own spinal cord. (Extreme Stenosis)
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