Medicated or unmedicated FET

[Claryfri]

Hello,

I am starting to feel the emotional toil of IVF.

The initial phases were great. Excellent stims response, excellent egg collection, and 3 high quality embryos. Unfortunately everything started to go tits up from fresh transfer.

Fresh transfer was cancelled due to high progesterone (4.6 but it was supposed to be 4.5), which is fine, I thought I could use the break.

However, now we are left to decide if we want to go with a medicated or natural FET. I have regular cycles so I am happy to go with natural, however, my clinic doesn't do weekend transfers, so if by any chance my transfer falls on a weekend it would be cancelled! Also, they do not do ultrasounds either on weekends so if my 11th or 12th day of cycle ends up on a weekend they may cancel those, too! (like our bodies work 9-5 ).

Alternatively, the nurse said that I could go with a mild medicated transfer, and it means I could take oestrogen for 2 weeks and then cyclogest, and that could be better for us to avoid cancellation on weekends. I am tired of taking hormones, I don't think it's great on the long run for my health, but I think the mild medicated could be the best option to avoid any stress.

I know that ultimately this is my decision, but I want to hear from any other experiences

[Jules0277]

I would go with mild medicated, it sounds like it will be less stress in the long run. And hopefully guarantees a transfer 😀

[Claryfri in reply to Jules0277]

Thank you. It is my day 1 of cycle today, so I feel very overwhelmed by EVERYTHING. I could go ahead and do natural on this cycle, but embryo transfer would fall 48hrs BEFORE my wedding and I think that would also be incredibly stressful for me 😱

[Tnthketnf]

It's annoying that clinics aren't flexible.

Personally if my clinic was in UK I would choose natural as I have had my fair share of medicated ones and the natural transfers are easier on the body. If they are cancelled you just go next month as opposed to waiting until you cycle settles back to normal after you stop the synthetic hormones.

On the other hand many women have medicated cycles and it's fine.

I was told they have same success rates and overall outcomes

[Claryfri in reply to Tnthketnf]

Unfortunately there is a time to pay if the natural cycle gets cancelled 😞. I go back and forth and I may even go ahead and do it this month even if transfer falls 2 days before the wedding

[Tnthketnf in reply to Claryfri]

Ah I see my clinic would refund you most of your payment if a frozen transfer is cancelled but yeah still a charge. Good luck!

[Doodlebug23]

Modified natural was the one that worked for me but I didn’t have the stress of timing as my clinic said the transfer would be when it needed to be. I just had to get my ass to Spain! I had 5 failed medicated and 1 failed natural before my BFP.

[Claryfri in reply to Doodlebug23]

Glad you got there in the end! Bracing myself for many failed attempts. I am just so worried about the cost. We already know we have very limited resources and it’s a miracle we got this far

[Doodlebug23 in reply to Claryfri]

I’m lucky I did a refund guarantee program that included all transfers 😏

[Sja1981]

I can't answer your query re timing and meds but I wanted to say I've found a fertility counsellor via BICA who I am starting with today as the emotional exhaustion has been really overwhelming for me and got more challenging through the process. Far more than I'd anticipated. I also spoke to a free counsellor via the fertility UK network yday who was helpful. My session today with an actual counsellor will be more in depth obviously and hopefully a regular thing. I probably should have got support sooner but only just found BICA. My EC alone in Spain was traumatic and I'm still working through that.

My close friends are MIA and seems to have little to no concern for what im going through. But I've found some brilliant new supports through this network and SMBC on FB x

[Claryfri in reply to Sja1981]

Awwww Sja, thank you so much! I am seeing a therapist already because I am diagnosed with GAD and depression, so that was an absolute priority for me. My clinic also offers free counselling and will take that up shortly. I am sorry to hear your friends are MIA, I had the opposite, my partner and friends have been way too involved in this, to the point that I feel an absolute sense of guilt and failure when appointments gets cancelled or when my progesterone was too high for fresh transfer. I thought I was failing THEM. So, counselling has been important to me because I need to resolve any issues on my own, without fearing of letting people down.

Everything is so odd for me at the moment, the stims and collection went well, it’s this post-collection period that left me emotionally on my knees. Also, I am getting married end of august and my wedding has been totally forgotten! All the major wedding events have been overshadowed by ivf. I thought I would have a break this month to enjoy my hen do or a couple of drinks with friends but nope! I got to decide about the transfer and coordinate the meds with the clinic and worry about how much this is going to be

[Millymolly28]

I totally get this, it can feel very overwhelming as there are constant milestones in the IVF journey…you cross one & celebrate & bam there’s another one, it’s mentally exhausting even when things do go well.

Are you in a position to wait until after your wedding? It’s just sad that you feel you’re missing all those special wedding events, and your little embryo will still be there after the wedding and you can concentrate on both events without one stealing from the other if that makes sense. ❤️

[GranolaHippo]

Hi,

I have nothing to add re: type of protocol as just starting my own (I went with natural but my clinic is open 7 days a week for transfer).

I would just reflect back that you sound like you're absolutely overwhelmed at the moment and that both IVF and pregnancy are super stressful experiences (at least, in my experience) and perhaps not best to rush into it ahead of your wedding, which is also a stressful life experience! All the hormones etc could easily ruin the day!

I think, as well, it's important to keep eyes on the end goal -to be parents, and to have the emotional resources to parent, rather than to just be pregnant.

Hopefully, you'll only be marrying once. I think it's is absolutely more than fine to let yourself off the hook, enjoy your wedding, including all the build up and any time off afterwards, and then return to IVF after that.

Your embryos aren't going anywhere, you ability to grow lining won't be harmed by a few months, and you'll then not have this added pressure on top. You may then find pregnancy (if it happens) and parenting easier.

Be really kind to yourself, this is all a lot, and having a transfer will add to concerns rather than detract from them. xx

[SMBCnewbie]

I had 1 cancelled natural FET last year as they missed my ovulation and it happened on a Sunday...this year I'm ovulating way too late inspite of a regular 26 day cycle. Short luteal phase means transfer would only be a few days before my period is due and progesterone doesn't always stop it coming, so that's 2 back to back cancellations this year. Now going to try an out of the box idea of delaying my period with norethisterone and trying to reset my cycle and see if ovulation goes back to what I used to have..anyway it risks another cancellation with either Sunday or I might still ovulate late (£695 cancellation each time which is so so stressful). I had a successful FET naturally last year (ended in miscarriage) on 1st actual attempt so have had my heart set on doing it again as I know it works...also I like idea of having a corpus luteum producing them natural pregnancy hormones and relaxin etc (will have progesterone anyway) and I am at risk of high blood pressure and medicated significantly increases that risk. I'm trying one more (I must be mad) and if that doesn't work then will go medicated.