Has anyone here been told to move to donor / adopt and proceeded with own eggs and been successful?

[Cuppppatea]

Has anyone here been told to move to donor and proceeded with own eggs and been successful? Nhs Consultant said that we need to look at donor eggs or adopt. He will not give us another round based on the response of the last round. Amh 1.8 and fsh 11

Two failed rounds.

I don’t think I can get my head around donor.

I think this is a bit hasty considering but I’m also worried about keeping going and having the same results. I believe I will get a better response private, or with mild ivf.

The first round two out of three fertilised but nothing grew past 4 cells - which I can accept was egg quality.

Second round - four eggs collected. used calcium Ionoohore and only one reached an early blastocyst. Failed transfer.

[Greenleaves1]

You should think about going for a private consultation and see what they say. I know the clinic I'm with encourages you to use your own eggs if you can. Nothing to lose by having tests redone and chatting through options with a consultant.

[Kitkat10]

hi, follow your heart. If you want to try OE again, see what a new consultant says perhaps? It’s often useful to have a second opinion.

In my own experience, I had to satisfy my hopes that my OE had done their best but that it was time to move on. I felt like I couldn’t rush that decision so I understand how you feel.

I found that a short cycle suited me better and seemed to get better quality eggs but fewer in number. I did ask my consultant about mild IVF but she said she didn’t think it was the best approach for me. I think I had similar results to yours, maybe FSH 9 , AFC was 6 and I was 40- 42 at the time.

Good luck xx 🍀🍀

[Cuppppatea in reply to Kitkat10]

Thanks for your reply. I just can’t even contemplate the thought of donor eggs at the moment, it’s making me sad as well because that means I may never have a baby. We also have bad male factor so it’s not as simple either. How many cycles did you do with your own ? What kind of clinic were you with? Non of the ones I’m looking at through access fertility offer mild - so it’s that or create as far as I can see. It’s all hit me hard tonight. Can’t stop crying. Don’t want a hug from my husband because now I’m blaming him for delaying us trying because he wanted a house first. Probably gonna end up with neither 😕 x

[Kitkat10 in reply to Cuppppatea]

Hi, don’t give up. I know it’s a horribly uncertain time but there are ways to get your baby.

I started age 39, had 2 cycles long down regulation- both BFN. Nothing to freeze.

Changed clinics and went for short cycle because this was what the clinic did routinely. I had 3 eggs collected, fertilised with donor sperm as my partner is infertile. One fertilised and became my now 2 year old son.

Desperately wanted a sibling for him so went again with OE collected at age 41. Got 3 embryos , all apparently 5AA or 5AB but all BFN.

By then I was tired of egg collections and I had been researching DE. I made a list for myself or the pros and cons and I looked at the list every 1-2 weeks and slowly realised that the cons were just not that important to me as time passed. I had counselling and it wasn’t an easy decision but for me, I knew it was my best chance.

My clinic is a CARE clinic now but they were independent when I started. Their success rates are average. They don’t believe in mild but I do think short cycle was better for my older eggs. I know lots of people on here have got more resilience than me and have done more rounds with OE and had success.

I think it’s worth getting a second opinion from another clinic, I think it helps just to keep talking these things through. You will know what’s right for you xx

[Spicycurry]

I think you should try private. Go to CRGH if you can. Fsh is ok. Age is more important. If you are under 40, you have a better sign. Are you dealing with MFI? IMSI is better than icsi. Also 200mg ubiquinol 3 times a day, omega 3 and wheatgrass would all help to lower fsh slightly and improve egg quality.

[Cuppppatea]

I had crossed crgh off my list due to bad reviews on here. Did you have a positive experience. I very much appreciate your replies x

[Nana123321]

hi, i had amh 0,05 ng/ml ( very very low) and still went on with ivf (icsi), mild medication, only got 3 eggs, one fertilised, transfer was 2 days later and i am now 7 weeks pregnant. I am 39 years old. Dont give up.

[Cuppppatea in reply to Nana123321]

Congratulations! How many cycles did you have? x

[Nana123321 in reply to Cuppppatea]

Thank you. It was my Second cycle. What i did, i drastically changed my diet, eliminated gluten, sugar …for 3 months at least. And ate a lot of different supplements (Ubiquinol, NAC, etc). I also did daily visualization (still doing it). My eggs reservs are really low, so i really dont understant why would you with 1,8 AMH consider donor egg. I think you should improve quality of your own eggs. Also very important, during TWW i didnt eat any form of sugar or anything sweet, to not push the sugar level up. And i had daily beetroot juice (cold press). I hope it helps you. I am still very nervouse because i am still at the beginning but i hope and pray for the best possible outcome.

[Cuppppatea in reply to Nana123321]

I did alot of this for my last cycle - my one blast was in really good shape compared to the last round where nothing was transferable. Did you have any male factor? Thanks for the encouragement and mega good luck with the pregnancy x

[Nana123321 in reply to Cuppppatea]

Not much of a male factor, only less quantity of sperm, but thats why we did ICSI. I put my husband also on suppliments. But he was occasionally smoking, which was also not optimal.

Keep eating healthy, keep taking supliments, be careful with sugar levels in tww, it will happen for you too. And go to private clinic if the one where you are now is not supporting you. Fingers crossed.

[MontsJ in reply to Nana123321]

This is fantastic. Being someone in a similar boat I’d really appreciate if you could PM me which clinic you had success with, and if a specific doctor.

[TallOne92]

I had to make the decision to move to donor eggs. When I began the process my AMH was 30 so great but I had 3 laparoscopy’s and with every one your level drops. Within a few months my level was below 3 and egg quality was too poor to proceed with OE.

We decided to go to a clinic in the Czech Republic and are hopeful that we will finally get our rainbow baby after 5 years trying.

Take time to make a decision that you are comfortable with, and be kind to yourself. This process is mentally, physically, emotionally and financially draining so don’t feel pressured into a decision.

You are doing amazing!

[Tnthketnf]

I am sure they'll be answers from women to say that they kept going despite the odss and they got their own genetic child in the end. But the overall statistics aren't promising.

The decision to continue or move on to DE /adoption depends on many factors, only one of them being the purely medical.

For the purely medical side I think age is more important that AMH. Especially for under 40 maybe there's an argument to try again with a different approach ? So another opinion will be good. But generally speaking the odds are only getting smaller

There are emotional psychological reasons. Every new failed cycle takes its toll on you and the relationship you, are in a constant waiting game, following your body symptoms, restricting small pleasures in life..living with the what if this, when this..etc. this doesn't change with DE or adoption but with DE it's more likely to be limited.

There are financial reasons. Not that DE or adoption don't involve huge costs but the less OE treatments before giving up the more money you have for whatever you chose to next.

Social reasons. The longer it takes for a couple/individual to have a child the older they get. In my case I am nearly 41 I made the move to DE and trying to plan a transfer but I realise that even if everything goes well I will be 42 if the baby ever comes having started ttc at 34.

I moved to DE despite a good AMH and good response in numbers of eggs retrieved. In a way this was giving me false hope. In hindsight I should have moved sooner.

[Lenley81]

We had our one NHS round last year & then we paid for a private round. After that, the consultant asked if we’d considered egg donation seeing as I’m 42 & by getting any younger. We were told that the clinic would fully support us if we wanted to try again with my own eggs….so that’s what we are doing. We have paid for two more rounds & if we are not successful with these two we will call it a day with my old lady eggs & decide whether to look at egg donors or adoption.

[Gerbear22]

Hi on my first round of ivf I was told that i would have to consider donor eggs as on my final scan before collection I only had 2 follicles.Completely devastated to be told this even before collection.Ended up with3 mature eggs and 2 embyros.Both transferred but didn't take.Went for second round and again told I would possibly have to consider donor eggs due to final scan only showing one good follicle.I was adamant that I was going to collection even with one follicle.Ended up with 2 eggs and 2 embyros.Had a day 3 transfer of both embyros.Now have a beautiful 10 month old.Amh was 7.7pmol/l at the time.Age 40 at the time.Now cautiously nearly 8 weeks pregnant naturally with an amh level of 1.2pmol/l.Don't give up.xx

[MontsJ]

I had three failed rounds of IVF with the same clinic before being advised to move on to donor eggs. Within two months I had conceived naturally. I had just turned 39, five months prior my AMH was 0.4. My AFC was 4-6, and my FSH levels varied from 7-13. I had been in the same supplements I had been for a long time. I had had a consult with two other clinics as was all geared up to move on to another cycle with another clinic. Like you I was but at all in the mindset to move on to donor eggs.

[Sunshine809]

I just wanted to agree with the comments that only you can decide when you're ready to stop trying. I had advice from my consultant after my second round to move to donor eggs. I did another two rounds because I wasn't ready to accept that. I wanted to feel like I'd tried everything I could.

My 4th round was just before I turned 40, and we had nothing to transfer. That was the turning point for me. We had a 12 month break to try to have a bit of normal life for a while and to make sure we had grieved the loss of a genetic child and were ready to move forward, and then we moved onto donor eggs. I don't regret our decision because I felt like I'd done everything I could with our own eggs.

I do wish we had changed clinic and consultant, so I recommend trying that if you can, to get a fresh perspective.

Wishing you all the best xx

[Cuppppatea in reply to Sunshine809]

Hey - what were the reasons for suggesting donor after two rounds ? Age/ amh etc ? X

[Sunshine809 in reply to Cuppppatea]

I was 38 and both rounds I'd only had 4 mature eggs, 2 fertilised and only one transferred at day 2 on round one, both transferred on day 3 on round two. No blastocysts achieved.

They told me it was due to my age and they said it would give me more chance of success to just move on to donor eggs.

I do understand that, but I also wonder if they are worrying about their stats- they don't want people to keep failing because it lowers their success percentage and might discourage people from using their clinic.

It's a money-making business at the end of the day.

Those are just my thoughts anyway! 😂

Best of luck xx

[Zassa]

I think some doctors say donor eggs a bit too quickly. E.g. I had a doctor who said it to me when just hearing my AMH of 4 without having tried fertility treatments and only wanting to do PRP.

I have previously had a failed IVF and then conceived naturally. In general I would say you would loose quality with high stimulation that is used in most IVF to get lots of eggs. It doesn't mean they are bad naturally. If regular IVF doesn't work you should try mild / natural IVF to optimize quality.

Good luck!