I am currently on day 6 of my second round of IVF. We're having to pay privately as my partner has a daughter. It probably will be the last time we can try as we've now got 2 loans to pay back and can't afford any more debt. I'm finding it all so very stressful but trying to stay as positive as possible. I work in a stressful health care job and have had very little support or acknowledgement of what I may be going through.
Has anyone been signed off sick during the IVF period and for how long? Or took special leave?
My partner doesn't understand at all that I may need time off. He's very old school and against sick leave. I don't want my stress and anxiety to impact this as it's our last chance. I don't even know how to explain it to my GP or boss as I feel like 'am I just being pathetic?' Can anyone help? I'm in UK xx
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If you work in the NHS then look up maternity and sick leave policy. Most trusts have a fertility clause in their policies to support IVF and ongoing treatments. I had 10 days leave for IVF support. Managers as well can make reasonable adjustments if you feel like you have to work or can not do face to face work. HR or your union will be able to give you loads of support here. You can also be counted as sick leave as a pregnancy related issue therefore it should not count towards your accumulated sickness. If you are trying to avoid letting others know (although I 💯 advise telling your manager, if definitely will not call you pathetic!) then GP and sign off with personal stress. If you want any further advice, you can always message! Good luck and sorry you are feeling so overwhelmed with this! Xxx
Hi, Thank you for replying xx sorry for delayed reply. Head is all over the place! I work for NHS but we only have a Parental leave policy and it doesn't mention IVF once! I think I can see that the ACAS website classes you as pregnant following embryo transfer so special leave could apply or I could ask GP to state sickness related to pregnancy maybe? xx
Have you checked your sickness/leave policy? Should be in there! If not then yes, GP with pregnancy related sickness, all NHS trusts cover this with full pay and no markers on sickness record. I would speak to your manager about this though and HR. With the changes to neonatal cover, there should and will be IVF cover in the new policy. Give me a shout if you need more guidance! Also, if you have a union - always a good shout! X
Hi, it doesn't mention IVF anywhere in the parental leave or sickness policy. I feel like I want to raise this in future with HR. Surrogacy is mentioned but not IVF! My GP has signed me off with pregnancy stress. I asked for him to mention pregnancy so work will understand it's related to the pregnancy policy not normal sickness policy. I hope I don't have to argue this out with them.
I'm due to have a student with me full time literally the week after my result, this is causing extra stress as I'm pretty sure I'll not be able to cope with it. I also have crohns which affects me with fatigue so feeling mega fatigued right now.
I'm not in a union at the moment as it was too much money! Thank you very much for all your help and advice xx
Hi smileandstretch, I haven’t taken time off but two girls I used to work with have recently. One friend got signed off for the 2ww because she wanted to make sure she was resting/ stress free.
Another girl took around 6 weeks off as we’re based in bham but she went to London for treatment and actually stayed up there for around a month, and then had the two week wait off after too. I’m not sure if she was signed off by her GP or if she had leave from work.
I think do what’s best for you. I need to keep my mind busy so going to work is best for me but if being off will help ease your anxiety and put you in a better head space then do it. It’s such a tricky time so do whatever works for you, be kind to yourself x
Hi lovely, I work in mental health in the NHS and have taken time off since we started meds to prepare for this cycle. It's our 3rd cycle and the last ended in miscarriage, so I wanted to devote all my attention to hopefully being successful this time.
The policies for my trust don't factor IVF in except for time off for appointments. Although, during the 2ww you are under pregnancy law anyway.
When I spoke to my GP I just explained that due to the stress of going through IVF I didn't feel I could devote the normal care to my role and patients. So my sick note just says "stress at home".
Do what's right for you, your body and mental health ❤️
Hi Gem thank you. Sorry for delay in reply. My head is all over the place. I understand as I want to devote all my energy and mindspace to this round as although it's only round 2 it might be our last (unless we can get a crowd funder for another!)
My Trust only has a Parental leave policy and it doesn't mention IVF at all. It's helpful to know after embryo transfer you're classed as legally pregnant. Did your sick note have to mention pregnancy to be covered under a pregnancy policy in your trust? Did it not affect sickness record then?
Hey! You're welcome ❤️ no worries at all!No, my sick note doesn't make any mention of pregnancy as the GP deliberately made it vague for privacy. I just make sure to have that conversation with my line manager. Pregnancy related sickness shouldn't impact sickness record, but if you go off before the implantation it would go towards normal absences.
Personally, I have issues with absences anyway due to endo so have had occupational health assessments.
I would personally recommend if you get any push back about taking time off, if you are in a union then please reach out to them. None of us ask to struggle with infertility and most of the time the people making these policies haven't been through this.
I'm always happy to answer questions or even just to chat so please don't hesitate to message xx
Thank you. I totally understand as I have had a lot of time off in the past with Crohn's. In the last few years I've been really lucky that's been more under control but I still work with Crohn's symptoms and fatigue and work don't understand.
I'm not under a union at the moment as it was too much money.
Thank you for your advice. My GP signed me off with pregnancy stress via the anima website so I didn't even have to speak to him. Work have been understanding thus far. Fingers crossed for embryo. Thank you lovely xx
As others have said they're should be a fertility clause in either the maternity or sick leave policy. At my old trust we had a fertility policy and I was entitled to time off.
It's also worth knowing that once an embryo is in, if it doesn't work you are entitled to two weeks of sickness without it counting towards your sick leave - but hopefully you don't need this as I have everything crossed that it'll work!
You are 100% not being pathetic! And your GP/boss will not think that and if they do they're terrible people.
hey, just wondered if you could provide more info on the entitlement to leave for the TWW? Is this law? My work is horrific, doesn't even pay sick leave so keen to look into this xx
It's not the TWW. It's if the transfer doesn't work and you need time off, legally the allowance is the same as for a miscarriage - I'll see if I can the information.
"The Acas guidance also states that “You have pregnancy rights once you’ve had the last part of the IVF process (‘embryo transfer’) and might become pregnant.” These pregnancy rights include the right to “reasonable time off with full pay for pregnancy-related (‘antenatal’) appointments.” Even if the embryo transfer was unsuccessful, employees are protected against pregnancy discrimination for two weeks after finding out, which might limit an employer in refusing requests for further appointments." So actually having read this you probably could take sickness in TWW and not be discriminated against:
Hi, Thank you for your message! Our trust just has a parental leave policy and it doesn't mention IVF. Where does it say 2 weeks off if it doesn't work? In your policy or somewhere online? They only got 1 egg fertilised so I'm going for day 2 transfer tomorrow. Really anxious xx edited: Sorry I've seen your other post! Thank you so much! xx
For my very last chance at IVF, I got signed off sick by a private GP who I had access to through work. I got signed off from around the time of the second scan until the end of the two week wait. In retrospect, I wish I had taken 2 weeks after the day I tested following the two week wait as mine wasn't successful and I've come to realise that IVF losses /failure is every bit as significant and as big as life trauma as a miscarriage (and actually legally you are classed as pregnant from embryo transfer in any event). I am glad I had sick leave as I now know I gave it my best shot given my stressful job! I just said to the GP that I was finding it all very stressful and that I have a very stressful role and was struggling and that this was my last shot at IVF which was adding to the stress. It was a female GP and she got it and suggested she sign me off while I did it.
Aww I'm so sorry. It's the same for me really. I don't think people understand the magnitude of this on your mental health. I took a day off 'sick' last time and I now realise I would have been entitled to 2 weeks special leave. We only got 1 egg and I'm going for a day 2 transfer tomorrow. I'm concerned our chances are too low. Thank you, I'm going to ring my GP this week xx
My trust didn’t have any policy for IVF so I spoke to a few senior HR staff and got them to add IVF to the special leave policy.
Our clinic is in Athens (here at the minute). I’ve had last week as special leave (37.5 hours) and then this week i’ve got a sick note off the GP.
For transfer I will use a few days annual leave but once you’ve had transfer and you’re classed as pregnant then you can take sick leave and it doesn’t go on your record. So I get a sick note for 2 weeks after transfers. HR were trying to refuse me but I spoke to ACAS.. got lots of literature and then sent it to HR!
I refuse to use any more than 2/3 days annual leave. AL is for fun.. IVF isn’t fun!! Good luck x
Thank you so much. I hope things are going well for you in Athens. It must be so hard to travel there as well as concentrate on keeping well. I'd also struggle financially. I'm not sure how you do it! It's cost us so much money (2 rounds paid privately) and all the private consultant appointments before that! My GP has signed me off for 2 weeks with pregnancy stress and I'll do the same as you and speak to HR about adding IVF to a policy as there is no mention of it! Surrogacy yes but IVF no! Thank you for your support and good luck to you xx
Thank you i’m home now.. PGT report pending!! 🤞🏼 🙏🏽
The logistics aren’t that stressful. My husband and I split the jobs to make it easier! He sorts flights and accommodation and I sort meds, scans and insurance.
I am sick of looking at ancient greek ruins haha but the Greeks are lovely and the care is outstanding xx
Absolutely speak to them and if they won’t speak to them take it higher! I wrote to our local MP as my trust was the same. Adoption policy, policy for gender identity, policy for surrogacy but nothing for IVF. It’s disgusting really in a predominantly female orientated job! I used to work down south and the trust there had one but apparently it’s trust specific and not actually a legal requirement.
Ooo great.. I'm not great with the lingo so not sure what's pending but I hope it all goes well for you!
It sounds like you have great team work. My partner and I are struggling to even decide how to pay for this second round as my mum's happy to give us the money but he won't agree to even borrowing it from her.
I will talk to HR. Would I be able to ask for your policy that you had changed as an example in future if I need it to support my argument?
My husband would be the same. I feel all I do is work and pay for IVF!
It was the family policy I had changed. I haven’t got a copy of it on my phone. I’m off work until Thursday night so I can email it to myself then and send it to you? x
Within the UK, for any job, you can self certify for the first 7days of sickness and only need a note from day 8 (that does include weekend days).So, you should be able to take this week and see GP within it, if you need more.
I took my first 2ww off as pregnancy leave, as others have discussed above.
To reassure you, me and everyone else going through a cycle, stress and anxiety does not have an impact on outcome, based on large scale studies. However, that doesn't mean it is insignificant. You are a whole person yourself and your welfare and wellbeing matters. So, please do take care of you, however that looks in this moment, and do what your brain and body need to take care of you. IVF is a lot. It's quite a male privillege to not see the need for headspace in it... xx
Aww thank you so much for understanding. I'm signed off by my GP now and I'm taking some me time to chill, eat healthily and go on short walks each day. Thank you for your support xx
Hey, nurse here!!!! I took off sick leave to go through IVF. Just go the GP and tell them what you’re doing letting them know how much it’s impacting your mental health alongside work etc. I’ve been off ever since as I have a high risk pregnancy. Mat leave starts 11 weeks before due date if you’ve been off for 6 months. I work on the gastro ward and there’s no way I could have done 13 hours on my feet with high blood pressure etc.
I once did IVF whilst working and it failed, so I listened to my body this rounds and did some self care- I’m now 5 months pregnant. Look after yourself so that you can look after your baby, and your patients when you’re back on duty after mat leave.
Aww thank you so much. Congratulations to you and hope everything is ok. I'm praying the self care helps me too as I didn't take any sick time off last round, other than a few days annual leave! I have Crohn's so I'm sure you know with working on a Gastro ward (which I know very well!) it's hard managing my preexisting fatigue and cramps. Thank you for your support and wishing you all the best with your pregnancy xx
Hope everything is going well so far! I’m in teaching, told my bosses everything and they have been nothing but supportive.
From day 7 of stimulation I took the time off due to being very tender and uncomfortable. I did a self cert for 5 days then my GP prescribed a fit note. I am still currently off work as I am 6DP5ET.
I didn’t take time off during my first time, and for me personally I wanted to get through this round completely stress free.
Hi Sam, thank you for your advice. I didn't take time other than a couple of days annual leave last time round and I wanted to make a change this time like you, to ease my stress and focus on my wellbeing.
How is everything going for you now? I'm now 6 days post embryo transfer. Keeping my fingers crossed and trying to be positive xx
That's amazing news! Congratulations. Do you mind me asking how old you are and what day was your embryo transferred? I'm really anxious and worried as I'm 40 and I know my chances are low but then I only had one embryo that fertilised so they had to transfer it on day 2 which know also has lower chance. I'm stressed as you can tell! xx
I’m 35, as we did a 5DT. We only had one embryo on the day and another developed on day 6, which was actually better quality than the one they transferred.
For me personally to get through the TWW, I rested a LOT! Didn’t google anything and didn’t test until the official day. I felt that no news was good news and symptom spotting would only cause stress… it’s actually flew over! xxx
Hi. I took time off during my last round of IVF, I work for a local authority and get 6 months paid leave. I have never really taken time off before and had done all our previous unsuccessful rounds while at work but I was stressed and run down. I was physically ill (flu like symptoms) 5x in a 6 month period leading up to it, which was causing me more stress trying to keep on top of my work, so I decided to take some time out. It was our last round (DE) as we couldn’t afford any more , like you we were all self funded as my husband has an older child, and I just wanted to give it everything and be in the best place to do it. I was signed off with stress and took nearly 5 months off to focus on getting myself well physically and mentally before my transfer and then after. We were successful and I returned to work 11 weeks pregnant. IVF is really stressful and has a huge impact on your body, it’s ok to take the time you need to focus on being well during this time. Good luck xx
Congratulations Clara, that's amazing news! Thank you for your support. I am signed off now and I'm trying to focus on my wellbeing and mental health whilst eating everything healthy I can find! Thank you xx
Hi I hope everyone’s encouragement to take the time off relieves you off that guilt we all have in the NHS for taking any time for ourselves. From your post you are likely preparing for your last IVF cycle and I think you should absolutely take the time off that you feel you need!
I was in a similar situation having had 3 failed cycles and embarking on a 4th knowing I couldn’t go through a 5th if it failed. So I called my GP to get a sick line from the time I started on meds and took a the whole time to focus on reducing my stress and caring for myself.
I had contacted Occupational health before I started my first cycle to inform them and also suss out what I was entitled to (it wasn’t great 3 days of leave and can attend appointments). I had been so unwell after EC that I always ended up taking more time off.
I had also informed my manager. And although he had never dealt with it before was supportive. After my 3rd cycle he also suggested I got referred to Occ health as had taken quite a bit off time off work( I did 3 cycles in 9 months so within a year had went over my sick leave allowance)… this did upset me and cause me bit of distress (… it also took 8 months from referral to apt) but after the assessment they said that I should be treated as if I have a disability. As mad as that was to read I believe it actually provides me with a lot of protection if I needed time off.
I availed of the councilling with IVF and my councillor was delighted when I took time out off work for my 4th cycle as she recognised the stress my job caused and also the stress I felt though taking time off / worrying I wasn’t focused enough to perform.
I hope your other half also reads all of our comments about how all of us in a similar job took the time off. I’m certain everyone commenting also struggled with taking this time but this isn’t just mitching off work this is just as valuable as a supplement or complimentary treatment and you are entitled to it! Wishing you a great outcome in your next cycle.
Thank you. It's really helpful to hear your story and how things have helped you. I have a disability already, Crohn's but I'm not sure it actually makes any difference at my work! I can totally understand how it feels to hit the trigger points and have the phase meetings like you're a criminal!
I had never gone off sick until I was ‘forced to’ by my colleague who could clearly tell, better than myself, that I wasn’t coping at all. I had an early loss before and my mind was scrambled going into our next transfer. The Gp was super understanding (unlike work). I had taken some leave for transfer if I can recall but then got signed off for the 2ww, I also got signed off for our third transfer and then some and didn’t feel guilty in the slightest! Both second and third transfer resulted in my two boys. I would say just explain how you don’t feel your coping mentally, work are in supportive and your aniexty is through the roof. If you want to message me your welcome too x
Aww thank you and congratulations on your sons! My GP was supportive and I now feel I understand my rights more from reading other posts which is helping my anxiety. Thank you for your support xx
Joining to support you in taking time off. Also work in health care, although not in the NHS.
I’ve taken various combinations of time off for stims, mostly just after the egg pick up but a couple where I worked part time or not at all during the injection phase. Have only had one transfer and I took a week off for that and tried to work less hours overall. Haven’t had any issues getting sick certificates from either my GP or specialist, both essentially said they’d give whatever I felt I needed to cope.
I’m still waiting for success and so can’t comment on better outcomes with taking leave, but i definitely found my mental health was better - being able to slow down, listen to myself and not have to act as much. Good luck with this round and I hope it goes as well as possible x
Thank you for your message. I'm sending you so much luck and positivity too. Thank you for your advice. My GP signed me off without question. Good luck to you xx
I work in the NHS and took sick leave during the cycles. Doesn't affect my sickness record as classed as fertility/pregnancy. Take the time off and look after you. We spend alot of money on ivf , so minimise stress as much as you can. I just went to gp and explained and they were really supportive
Thank you for your help. It's been really helpful to know pregnancy leave is different from normal sick leave. It's helped my anxiety around it all and I'm now signed off. On 2ww! Everything crossed! x
Here to comment the same as others, I also work in the NHS & have taken time off each cycle as sick leave as wasn’t mentally in the right space to work. I used to feel guilty but then learned very quickly that work is work & putting myself first for once was so much more important! Look after yourself 💕
Don’t be ashamed for taking sick leave. I don’t work for the NHS anymore, but as others have mentioned, they should have a sick leave, maternity and hopefully also an IVF policy. If you don’t work for the NHS speak to your company’s HR representative and ask them for their policies on these 3 topics.
My current company, not healthcare related, has policies covering each. For each round of IVF I used our IVF policy. Fortunately my treatment fell over the cusp of two financial years so I took everything I was entitled to in both financial years. My first round was at the end of the first financial year and I took all 10 days (prior to knowing I would end up being admitted into hospital for 2 nights after egg collection) My last two rounds were both in the second financial year. For the second round I only took 5 days under IVF policy but for the third round I took the remaining 5 days in the IVF policy and I also took a week’s worth of sick leave. Had things not turned out as hoped after the third round I would have taken longer sick leave.
Also worth knowing - under UK law, once the embryo has been transferred the UK treats this as a pregnancy up to the day of your pregnancy test and for a further 2 weeks after the pregnancy test, even if you test negative.
Please don’t feel ashamed to do this or take more. You are entitled to sick leave and other time off offered by other policies for these very reasons. You have to do best by you and I am so sorry to hear your partner feels otherwise.
Thank you. I'm sorry to hear you've had such a tough time. I will ask HR to update the policy as none mention IVF! Thanks to your and other's encouragement I'm signed off for 2 weeks now and I'm focusing on my wellbeing. I hope you're ok now. Thank you x
I took time off, 5 months. I am a teacher so didn’t return to work in the Aug when I started the IVF meds. I had my transfer the end of Sept and didn’t return to work until the Jan when I was nearly 20 weeks pregnant.
I was told stress would play a massive part in the success of IVF and my job is stressful. I get full pay for 6 months of being sick so made the decision to be signed off. My Gp was great.
Our daughter is now 10 months old so it’s been the best decision I ever made xx
I work in healthcare as a nurse unit manager. I’m on my 2nd round of IVF and 4th transfer. Currently 5dp5dt I work part time so I have that luxury and prefer to work as it keeps my mind busy and I’m mainly office based and I can remove myself from the busy department. If I were more “shop floor” I would 100% be off work. My place of work actually have a fertility policy that allows 10 days off for ivf treatment limited to 10 days per year and you can use this for 2 rounds total. Check your workplace policy but also if not… just go off sick it makes no difference either way- sickness or not you’re not in work! Don’t forget you can self cert for 7 days. Look after yourself and don’t put yourself under unnecessary stress!
Thank you for your advice. That's really good that your trust have a 10 day IVF leave policy. My trust doesn't even mention IVF in any policy! Good look to you. Sending lots of positive thoughts x
Its mad how people can’t understand how much stress a person can go through during this time. Look into your job policies… I took long term absence leave for 6 months …. Fully paid, i just needed sick notes from the drs to show my workplace that i was under stress and anxiety!
thanks for raising this to the community. I have found this post so useful! You are not pathetic my dear!just listen to your body and mind and do what make you make you feel better.
Similar story here. I am a nurse working for NHS. I am about to start IVF in Spain. Had a conversation with my manager offering all her support but she is not. She asked to book leave when I have to travel for appointments or treatments. I have already used 1 week leave to attend my appointment in January and February. HR said there is not IVF policy, only AL, unoaid leave or flexible working which doesn’t work for me.
End of April is my next appointment and if the scan and bloods are good I can start stimulation. I booked two more days AL for this. When I’ll be going back for eggs collection I told my manager I’ll provide sick note, she said I have to use my leave. I won’t though. On top of that, I leaave with a long term neurological condition and have OH adjustments. My manager seems to forget about my condition. I had several conversations explaining that stress is like poison for my condition.
Going back to IVF, my case is quite complex and I might need longer time. I also need PGT-A so embryo transfer won’t be immediate. I was thinking to take AL to attend my next appointment, when I come back to London I start meds for stims and will go back for my first eggs collection ever I think I’ll take sick leave instead. As some of you have said, AL is for fun, IVF isn’t fun.
Ah thank you. It sounds like your work are being completely unreasonable!!! Your manager sounds like she's discriminating against your disability and needs to be reported to a union! I work with people with long term neuro conditions and I have Crohn's myself so I know how having a preexisting condition makes it all a billion times worse! I suffer with fatigue and my last boss completely did not understand that!Take sick leave. You are covered after transfer as others have said. That's definitely helped me to reduce anxiety as it won't affect my normal sick leave entitlement. Wishing you the best of luck. Sending hugs xx
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all going well so far… have my 7 week scan next Friday! How are you finding the TWW? xxx
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