Clinic Has Told me They Can't Give Me... - Fertility Network UK

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Clinic Has Told me They Can't Give Me Dates

ttcemmie profile image
30 Replies

Seething at my clinic. They have told me I'm not a priority and so they can't even tell me when the dates I will be having treatment are. Understand I'm not one of the priority people, but the clinic matches everyone's cycles up with the pill to do one egg collection week a month so surely they know what number they can do in a month and give dates to the next people? They're saying maybe August for egg collection. How is it possibly this far away?! Phone lines still off..... I am finding they are having no urgency about them at all!

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30 Replies
FrancyItaly profile image
FrancyItaly

Why are you not a priority?

ttcemmie profile image
ttcemmie in reply toFrancyItaly

Because I didn't have a cancelled cycle. I do understand these people are a priority.

FrancyItaly profile image
FrancyItaly in reply tottcemmie

Ah I get it now. Yes that makes sense.

KiboXX profile image
KiboXX

I’m so sorry you’re having such a frustrating time with them, last thing you need!

Am I right in thinking you’re on a two year unlimited cycles package? Just wondering if it’s worth complaining to Access Fertility directly? As you’ve signed up to something and aren’t able to even get an idea of a start date. Seems really unfair xx

ttcemmie profile image
ttcemmie in reply toKiboXX

Thanks KiboXX. Yes, I have done that. Asked for an extension on the 2 years, I guess, but that's not really the point. Mentally, I am finding it impossible.

KiboXX profile image
KiboXX in reply tottcemmie

That’s completely understandable. You need something to work towards and it’s ridiculous they are being this vague. I’m sorry, I wish I had some better advice! Big hugs xx

Stevie85 profile image
Stevie85

That's really annoying for you. I think I'm really lucky that my clinic are up and running but they are a small private clinic. But you at least deserve some information. Really feel for you xx

cggregory profile image
cggregory

I’m so sorry, love. This really sucks. I totally agree that they should be able to do the maths and give you an answer. It’s unacceptable that their phone lines are off...I’d be livid.

ttcemmie profile image
ttcemmie in reply tocggregory

Yeah, thanks, I am livid. What sort of service is this?!

Ivf2020A profile image
Ivf2020A

Eughhh im so sorry about this surely your paying a lot of money and they still can not give you an idea , the way fertility patients are being treated is disgusting

ttcemmie profile image
ttcemmie in reply toIvf2020A

I know, right?! It's so much money, and then I feel like I'm being treated as some sort of nuisance. I just can't imagine if I was paying for any other sort of private healthcare and they turned their phones off and told me I maybe wouldn't be seen for three months (but can't give me actual dates).... seems crazy to me.

Southwestcat profile image
Southwestcat in reply tottcemmie

Hi - ah so sorry......just wondering can you contact HFEA ( I think I emailed them once and they got back to me ) Phones being off isnt acceptable, the HFEA guidlines say that clinics have a duty to keep patients informed . What about the counselling service, are they offering this ? (when the phones are answered ) . Is this Create ? ( I was a a Create clinic last year and had been ringing about a refund due from January and really difficult to get through ....) They have a number of clinics don't they ,( Bristol emailed me today ) . It just is not acceptable for phone not to be answered / emails too esp now they are reopened .

The clinic i am at is starting up slowly but i always have to be persisiant about getting replies ( even b4 the lock down) xx

Lovemylion profile image
Lovemylion

Ahhhh that is frustrating. It seems ridiculous that they’re phone lines are off. They’re only making matters worse for all their desperate patients! As treatment hasn’t quite begun yet at my clinic they’ve assigned a member of staff to deal with phone calls....I can’t see why your clinic can’t do that either! I’ve been told also I’m not priority and my cycle was cancelled. Priority is given to those with low amh/egg reserve, age and those having cancer treatment are, which I understand and have been given a rough date of July/August but it is not set in stone. I guess it’s a date to aim towards. It is frustrating though.....especially your clinics lack of communication. Hopefully they will get some concrete dates for u soon lovely! X

ttcemmie profile image
ttcemmie in reply toLovemylion

Yeah, a lot of desperate patients and it feels like they don't care. There's no urgency there! I can see that Create Fertility carried out their first egg collection since lockdown two days ago. When I said to the nurses that other clinics already had people on plans etc., she basically told me that was impossible as they were only allowed to apply to reopen from last week. Sure, but you can have virtual consultations, people on drugs etc. without them being in the clinic! I don't know; I guess I'm just really really angry (as well as upset). I expected more. Can't believe you're not a priority! Guess each clinic is deciding it for themselves. xxxx

Luna_79 profile image
Luna_79

Hey emmie, so sorry to hear you are being given the run around, it feels like another set back when if at least they gave you a date you could aim for something. If it’s any consolation you’re not alone, my clinic- it took me ages to get hold of anyone, the phones were on a loop no one answering and couldn’t leave a vm - when I did get through , after a good while of the receptionist not been able to find my records!!! Great!! She said hadn’t I asked for a nurses app - er no because in my follow up consultation at that time no apps were being taken my consultant said wait for the clinic to open and then call to resume treatment, then another wait , Then was told If I hadn’t spoken to a doctor about the FET then I’d need that but I could be on the waiting list - said no one had discussed the protocol with me just that , that is the next step after our failed fresh transfer, another wait then she said if I wasn’t on the waiting list she would call me back but if I was then she wouldn’t!! Stupid me said oh ok!! Got off the phone and hubby said well we’re no better off! She didn’t call back so now don’t know if I’m I am actually on the waiting list - just hoping I am and she just didn’t forget to call back because guess what I can’t get through again! Added to this super annoyed at myself as have comfort eaten and now have piled on over a stone just so fed up with this whole process, everywhere I look there are babies and Prams 😔

Let hope that one day soon our long wait will be over - lol and we can start the whole nightmare if the 2ww!!! 🙈 sending you a big hug!!! Xx

ttcemmie profile image
ttcemmie in reply toLuna_79

Sorry to hear this is happening to you. All these "you need this appointment" and you need that etc. bother me. They have done that to me pre-coronavirus and it feels like stalling tactics, but why are they stalling? Surely just get people in, treat them and out again? The cynic in me thinks that they are trying to get new patients in and space out everyone to ensure a constant cycle of new and/or high profit clients coming through. My clinic has told me going forward they would need at least 3 months between IVF cycles. Again, why? I am considering leaving them, but have an emotional attachment and plus we're tied in with Access Fertility.

Keep trying to get through to them again! I know it's a pain, but it's hard to know what to say at the time and hard to know how to pressure them. Hope you get through soon!

Aussie83 profile image
Aussie83

It is so incredibly wrong to tell you that you’re not a priority, especially when you’re paying all that money. I get some people have to be first but they really need to choose their words more tactfully. They should know better in this fragile business they’re in!

My clinic had their phones turned off too but I finally got a call back on Monday and she said they’d all been furloughed for two weeks, hence the no answer 🤷🏻‍♀️

I would write up a complaint email, if only to get your point across. They work for you remember, the same as a lawyer or an accountant. We have to advocate for ourselves x

ttcemmie profile image
ttcemmie in reply toAussie83

Strange that they'd been furloughed when there's clearly still work to do. I imagine people have still been calling constantly throughout these past few weeks! And they could have been getting schedules ready etc.... I won't be writing a complaint email, only because I have seen on the internet (super reliable, I know) of people who have complained to their clinics and got worse treatment or refused. Feels like they're taking advantage of desperate people and demand must be outstripping supply.... Glad you got a call back on Monday. x

Maisie234 profile image
Maisie234

I totally feel your frustration. I don't know why they think they can do that when you're paying for it. I really don't see why they can't give you a date. You have a life to work round too.

I've phoned my clinic twice and they say they will call me back and it's not happened. I'm phoning back today and if I get any info worth sharing I will. If they can commit to a date in August with a bit of pressure, it will come round sooner than you think. It's June next week and you could maybe start end of July.

This could be your one last hurdle. I truly hope so. Xx

ttcemmie profile image
ttcemmie in reply toMaisie234

Sorry to hear that, Maisie. Yeah, I think committing to a date and getting a schedule drawn up (even if it is August, which is super far away) would be helpful. Then I have a plan and I can see it and work towards it. Hope your clinic calls you back soon! x

Lots8788 profile image
Lots8788

So sorry to hear this lovely. How frustrating and uncaring! Really hope you get some answers soon and this is the last hurdle for you. Big hugs to you x x

ttcemmie profile image
ttcemmie in reply toLots8788

Thanks, lovely. I was quite upset yesterday. This journey is awful. Hopefully not too many more hurdles. x

Lots8788 profile image
Lots8788 in reply tottcemmie

Ah bless you I'm not surprised! It's all the being in limbo too that just adds unnecessary stress! Hope so hun 🤞😘 always here for a chat if you want to x x

ttcemmie profile image
ttcemmie in reply toLots8788

The being in limbo is definitely awful! Thanks. xxxx

Arrhgghh how maddening for you! So sorry to hear that

What’s frustrating is every clinic is decided what ‘priority’ means. There’s no consistency. So my clinic it’s frozen and people who have had their cycles cancelled, I’ve heard of several clinics doing EC only, others prioritising by egg reserve, others by age etc etc it seems to be pot luck what your clinic is doing - mine is no fresh so that’s me ruled out despite being 43 with a DoR!

ttcemmie profile image
ttcemmie in reply to

Yeah, it's really strange that priority is different by clinic, but anyway... time is ticking for all of us! Lol, so it's not like there's anyone who isn't in a rush for treatment! Really feel for you with your age, though, you would think that would be an uber-priority! I did ask if doing a frozen I would be able to go through treatment quicker (as frozen doesn't have EC etc.), but they flat out said no, so doesn't feel like they're trying to get anything moving for me. My husband says to stop thinking it's all one big conspiracy theory, but I don't think it's a conspiracy theory, I just expect a lot better from them!

JoP32 profile image
JoP32

Sorry to hear this lovely. I totally understand your frustration - it’s the not knowing ‘when’ that is so hard.

Sending you lots of hugs and I’ll be keeping everything crossed for you you get some news soon. Xxx

ttcemmie profile image
ttcemmie in reply toJoP32

Thanks. x

Lavender96 profile image
Lavender96

I’m so sorry to hear this. I completely get how frustrating and upsetting it is. My clinic hasn’t even applied to open yet and won’t give us any indication of when they will be, they just keep saying ‘we’re working on our application’. I’m praying that the delay means they’re actually putting measures in place before they apply so they can open quickly, but I don’t know, it’s just a guessing game right now as they won’t tell us. I think it’s really hard when you don’t have any dates to work towards. It’s like being in limbo, constantly hoping for an update everyday! I really hope they can provide you with some actual dates soon xx

ttcemmie profile image
ttcemmie in reply toLavender96

Sorry to hear about your situation, too, Lavender. This is what I don't get! Surely, they should have been preparing to reopen the entire time they were shut! It shouldn't need being told they can apply to reopen to start getting ready for it.... it was obvious when they were shut that there would need to be more social distancing, probably PPE, hand sanitiser, no partners at appointments etc. when reopening and they should have been putting a plan together ages ago! I do hope you're right that they will be more ready to reopen as they're taking longer with their application. Mine being open doesn't feel like any help to me whatsoever at this moment! Hate limbo; hope we all get updates soon. If some clinics can do it, there's no reason ours can't! x

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