Feeling so sad. : Not sure why I’m... - Fertility Network UK

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Feeling so sad.

Emma04 profile image
13 Replies

Not sure why I’m posting but I know you’ll all understand. I’m just feeling so sad and helpless at the moment. As you might know I’ve had two BFP that have ended in miscarriage in the last few months. Our baby would have been due in two weeks and I know this is probably the main cause of my sadness but I feel so lost and empty at the moment. This journey takes so much from us, I am avoiding friends and family as I can’t face them right now, and I don’t want to make plans for later in the year as the only plans I really want to make are baby plans but I can’t face thinking about another round of icsi either. Infertility is just so cruel and sad isn’t it?

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Emma04 profile image
Emma04
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13 Replies
Green_ profile image
Green_

Hi Emma04. Sorry to hear you are feeling sad but I think it’s understandable why you feel this way. Take your time and do what you need to do and when you are ready think about your next step. I too had 2 rounds of ICSI which unfortunately failed. I was on short protocol both times and I was ok with the treatment, EC and ET but struggled massively when it failed.

Look after yourself and treat yourself if you can because you definitely deserve it. Xoxo

Emma04 profile image
Emma04 in reply to Green_

Thank you for your reply, I’m so sorry you’ve had two failed rounds. It’s horrid isn’t it? We had two failed rounds before two BFP from our last two rounds - And I know how sad and disappointing a failed round is. Will you try another round? I had short protocol for my last cycle and it’s amazingly quick isn’t it? You take good care too xxx

Green_ profile image
Green_ in reply to Emma04

I’m going to have the follow up appointment in few weeks and hopefully we can try again in few months. Until then I will do some more research and get healthier. It will be self funded so we need to find a private clinic or decide if we self fund and stay with the nhs clinic. Short protocol is very quick and amazing for the ones that works the first time.

Do you think you will try again this year?xxx

Emma04 profile image
Emma04 in reply to Green_

I think we probably will but it will be long protocol again for us as egg quality wasn’t so good for me on short protocol even though it ended in a bfp. This will be put fourth self funded cycle now. I hope your follow up appointment goes well for you. I always find them strangely comforting as at least the appointment means moving in the right direction again.

Green_ profile image
Green_ in reply to Emma04

Thank you. I only had the one follow up and found it so disheartening and negative so will have to see what he will say this time. I was told the chances are very low and strangely enough I had more follicles and a better embryo transferred. I’ve learnt more about ivf from here and google than from the information given by the clinic .they were very nice but not really explained much.

We definitely want to try again.

Emma04 profile image
Emma04 in reply to Green_

Sorry to hear that, I’ve always found my follow ups really informative. I agree with finding out loads from this site though. Wishing you lots of luck xx

Green_ profile image
Green_ in reply to Emma04

Thank you same to you xx

Violet5451 profile image
Violet5451

Sending you lots of love and hope you feel a little better soon. Be kind to yourself, do what you need to do and don’t feel bad about it. Xxx

Katyg16 profile image
Katyg16

I’m so sorry to hear you are feeling so low, but you are not alone. I’ve decided to take councilling to help me find a way through it, your clinic might offer it as part of your treatment so might be worth a check, or go see your doctor to get some help through these tough times. Certainly don’t feel guilty for giving yourself time to grieve xx

hifer profile image
hifer

I feel for you so much. I would have been due in May but also had a miscarriage last year. I have been in limbo for the last 2 years with regards to planning holidays, job changes, moving house etc etc. Just feels like we can't make any plans. I'm currently in the 2WW but have all my period symptoms so I know it's coming this week. Like you say, it's so cruel and hard. My advice would be to plan a weekend away with your OH or a night out or something. You need to have some fun and time to relax. It's so easy to forget yourself on this journey and lose the joy in life. Wishing you all the very very best xx

Gemz29 profile image
Gemz29

It’s horrible to feel so low and have had the same thought of what stage would I be at now.... take some time for yourself and do as much as you can to improve quality when your ready.... that’s what I’m doing x

Elynn profile image
Elynn

Sending you huge hugs....you've every reason to feel sad...take time to mourn...its all so raw. Hope u have good people around you 🌼🌻🌼

I could have written this myself. No wise words I’m just so sorry there isn’t any easy fix. Hugs xx

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