Struggling: Hi Hope you’re all doing... - Fertility Network UK

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Struggling

Barbara1012 profile image
31 Replies

Hi

Hope you’re all doing ok x

Started my FET on 1st November and today is day 7 of down reg. I knew this was going to be tough but feeling really low and am a teary, scared anxious mess.

Have not been sleeping well and the idea of facing work tomorrow fills me dread. I have a work trip to Chicago on Sunday which I’d normally be quite excited about, but suddenly feel scared and anxious about it. It’s a conference hosted by our US team and I won’t really know anyone, haven’t shifted the weight I gained during our first cycle and nothing seems to fit so that’s adding to my general anxiety. The time difference is six hours so will need to do my injection at 1.30 pm in some conference toilet cubicle. So many Q’s doing circles in my head, Where do I do I stash the used injection? What if start to blub during the conference ect

All in all - wallowing a bit and need to snap out of it.

Just needed a little rant xx

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Barbara1012 profile image
Barbara1012
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31 Replies
genten profile image
genten

Aww poor you. I can understand the worry and emotions and to be out of town too, that will all build up.

No idea where you'll put your injection but if it gets too much during the actual conference (hopefully it won't) then you will just have to leave the room for a while.

I hope everything goes well tomorrow. Sending a hug

Xxx

Barbara1012 profile image
Barbara1012 in reply to genten

Thanks lovely. Feel a bit perkier today. Busy day at work has kept me focused on the task at hand. How are things with you? Xx

Masha111 profile image
Masha111

Hi Barbara.

Its not easy is it, with all the emotions and work....it truly is an emotional rollercoaster of a journey.

Ask the clinic all the questions you may have in advance of your trip to Chicago. Is there any chance someone else can go instead perhaps if you dont feel upto it? Hope all goes well for you xx sending you lots of love, strength and prayers xx

Barbara1012 profile image
Barbara1012 in reply to Masha111

Thank you xx it’s a little tricky, I have not told them about it this round as just can’t be dealing with the questions if it fails and the sympathetic looks. Think I was just having an off day it will be ok. How are you? Xx

Masha111 profile image
Masha111 in reply to Barbara1012

Im ok thanks. In truly blessed. I cant complain about my symptoms given what everyone on here is going through.

Autumnmoon profile image
Autumnmoon

You are very brave to keep going and attend a conference hope it will be more enjoyable than you are thinking best wishes for your transfer x

Barbara1012 profile image
Barbara1012 in reply to Autumnmoon

Thank you. Not sure it’s brave just trying to keep a sense of normality this time round. On the last one, I took it really easy and wrapped myself in cotton wool this time I just need to crack on with life xx how are you ?

Autumnmoon profile image
Autumnmoon in reply to Barbara1012

It's really not easy I admire all the ladies who post on here I joined the forum for advice on how to support my daughter she was having a tough time and very nervous about having IVF we were so lucky hers was successful and her baby is due in just 4 weeks here's wishing all works out for you x

Leannefb profile image
Leannefb

Hi

I'm sorry your struggling at the moment just wanted to let you know I'm thinking of you and I know you can do this your strong and brave. I hope the trip to Chicago goes well and I'm sure you'll smash it 💪xx

Barbara1012 profile image
Barbara1012 in reply to Leannefb

Thank you, really kind. Feel a little better today, how’s things with you? Xx

Leannefb profile image
Leannefb in reply to Barbara1012

Things are ok thanks just started our natural FET have my first scan tomorrow to see if body is doing what it should. Have to say am terrified about relying on nature this whole process has made me reliant on medication and thought of going it alone is scary xxx

Barbara1012 profile image
Barbara1012 in reply to Leannefb

Yeah it must be. I remember the peeing on the ovulation sticks and being frustrated nothing was happening. We didn’t really get that choice - fingers crossed your body will spring into action. It will be ok xx

Wishfully profile image
Wishfully

Oh it’s so hard & it’ll be the Buserelin making you feel low and anxious. I found the low mood was most intense around this time - I promise you it does lift. Try to get as much sleep as you can, to stabilise your mood. Speak to your clinic about carrying the used needle - in one of my rounds I was given needles with a plastic clip on the end, which sealed off the exposed needle after use, so a separate sharps bin wasn’t required. That would be ideal for you while you’re travelling.

It might also be worth confiding in one person you trust who is also going on the work trip, so you know you have someone who has got your back while you’re out there, in case of hot flashes, anxiety etc. I think it just helps to know you have support. Sending you big hugs, you’ve got this!

Barbara1012 profile image
Barbara1012 in reply to Wishfully

Thanks lovely, that’s really helpful. How things with you? Feeling a bit better today am hoping to get home and get some sleep xx

Foodie23 profile image
Foodie23

I’m so sorry you’ve been experiencing low mood and anxiety. I know how hard it is to cope with this while working and then having the stress of IVF on top of it must feel unbearable.

I agree with the other suggestions of reaching out to your clinic to help you sort out the logistical aspects. It sounds like it’s too late to make any changes with the work trip, but if there’s someone else who could potentially go, perhaps it wouldn’t hurt to look into it? I know sometimes it can be possible to change names on a flight. Although, all the rushing to make these last-minute changes might cause extra stress.

I also think it would be great if you could confide in someone else who is attending, so you have some support while you’re there. Many people do their injections on the go, so I’m sure it won’t be as difficult as it feels, especially after you’ve done it once. Take breaks when you need and take extra good care of yourself.

It’s not ideal, but I’m certain you’ll get through it. Big hugs to you. Xx

Barbara1012 profile image
Barbara1012 in reply to Foodie23

Thank you. I think I need to go and just try and relax into it. So many people go through worse things so I need to put my big girl pants and crack on - (she says now!). It is hard,ivf is definitely one of the hardest things I’ve dealt with for some time. How are you? Think you started in Oct? Xx

Lynnr54 profile image
Lynnr54

Sorry you’re feeling down and anxious. As the other ladies have said it is normal to feel like this. You’ve got so much riding on it that it’s bound to cause emotions to run high. I go on various work conferences and I don’t like the ones where I don’t know anyone either, but I tend to find there are usually others in the same situation who I can depend a bit of time chatting to. Failing that I enjoy a bit of down time just for me to get my head round whatever is going on in life (obviously outside session times). Re the injection, do you have a plastic cap or anything like that? I’ve done a couple of injections in toilets (and have seen other ladies say the same) and I’ve always had a plastic cap that I’ve just been careful to replace and then stash securely in a pocket in my handbag until I’ve been able to get to my sharp bin. I take it you’re not staying at the same place as the conference and can’t go back to your hotel room? One thought is you might want to ask your clinic for a spare sharp bin to take with you - not sure airlines would be happy with you flying with an open sharp bin with used needles in it. Hope it all goes well!

Barbara1012 profile image
Barbara1012 in reply to Lynnr54

Thanks Lynnr54, I think the spare bin idea is a good one. I can’t seem to think rationally with all the fuzziness, am sure it will sort itself out soon and hopefully there will be a few other Billy no mates there:) how’s things with you? Xx

Cinderella5 profile image
Cinderella5

Ahhhh the joys of down regulation....not! These drugs really mess with your hormones and your head so Im sure what you are feeling is totally normal and travelling whilst having to worry about injecting will be the cherry on top! I can relate to the not having shifted weight, this is something that gets me down quite a lot but it'll be worth it. Try not to worry, you'll have a handbag Im guessing, so just stick a little make-up bag with your injections in it. You'll be absolutely fine Im sure of it! you'll maybe feel going away quite lonely but you'll still have us lot on here regardless of the time difference! Bigs hugs, you got this!xx

Barbara1012 profile image
Barbara1012 in reply to Cinderella5

Thanks lovely. I suspect you’ll see a peak in my level of participation. Which is actually quite nice / the plane has WiFi and it will be nice to catch up with some of the stories and news in here (and hopefully sleep too). Work has been manic latterly - and today I actually managed to function on a couple of hours sleep. It certainly wasn’t my best work though:)

How are you? You any further forward with dates? Xxx

Cinderella5 profile image
Cinderella5 in reply to Barbara1012

Ha ha ha well that's what we're here for, think we all dip in and out in between cycles etc. Awww you're surely flying in a super plush plane if it has WIFI, hope your work has paid for some comfy seats so you can catch up on that sleep.

Im good thanks. AF finally arrived (I swear my body is trying to pee me off), so hopefully get started on meds soon and transfer in around end of Nov.....eeeeek!xx

Barbara1012 profile image
Barbara1012 in reply to Cinderella5

Ooh that’s exciting!! I think we’ll be on 2ww around the same time, my transfer is expected end of Nov beginning of Dec depending how living ect works out. Trying not to have exact dates in mind to avoid disappointment!

And yes, plush seats on business class. So at least that’s something :)) xxx

Tugsgirl profile image
Tugsgirl

Perfectly understandable. It’s a difficult time emotionally and that’s without all the drugs playing havoc with your hormones too. You’ve taken a lot on with the treatment and trip but I think you’ll manage ok in the end. It will work out xx

Barbara1012 profile image
Barbara1012 in reply to Tugsgirl

Thanks Vicky. Think I was wallowing a bit, so many have it so much worse and I am thankful I have the opportunity to be able to give IVF a go, so I can’t really complain. It’s just so fudging hard at times xx How’s things with you?

Take a small Tupperware to put the used injection in until you get to your sharps bin- or an old takeaway tub that you can throw away if you prefer. I used to have a handbag sized little tub which fitted the needle, swabs etc in and I did many injections in various public toilets over the course of my three rounds. It was always fine, you can do it xx

Barbara1012 profile image
Barbara1012 in reply to Lizzielizzielizzie

Thanks Lizzie, the glamorous lives we all lead :) how are you? Xxx

Suzannah1985 profile image
Suzannah1985

Hi Barbara,

Sorry to hear you are having a tough time. It will be the buserelin making you feel low, I am also down regging at the moment and I felt like 💩 until I had my period.

I am also travelling with work next week and managed to get some small travel sharps bins on Amazon, they were on Prime so I got them next day. They were £5 for two.

Hope it goes well, PM me if you need some support next week, I will be in China so may not respond quickly, but will respond x

Barbara1012 profile image
Barbara1012 in reply to Suzannah1985

Thanks Suzannah, that’s really kind. Will look at Amazon now xxSafe trip and likewise please reach out. Think your trip is longer plane journey, so all the best xx The support on here is always great and helps a lot xxx

TRYING2016 profile image
TRYING2016

Hello i hope you are ok, seemed to have missed this post! I hope you are doing better, as all the ladies have already said you are really brave to continue and it is hard but you can do this and you will do this. Im sorry i dont have much to say but heres a big hug xxxxxx

Barbara1012 profile image
Barbara1012 in reply to TRYING2016

Thank you, really appreciated and back at you xx how are you doing lovely? xxx

TRYING2016 profile image
TRYING2016 in reply to Barbara1012

Im doing ok just waiting for my hysteroscopy appointment then will be starting FET, trying to get back to healthy eating xxx

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