Feel rubbish again

[Miroslava]

Hello everyone x didn't post for longer but I read every post every day and am with u all through bad and good x after our second failed icsi nearly 3 month ago and big struggle I managed to get bit better ... with my partner we decided to get married end of April next year .... to give another go more time this time no rush into it so much like last time .. i want to loose some weight I put on during Ivf and was finally excited for something and looking forward to wedding .. didn't forget our loss and it still hurts a lot but it was all crushed today when my partner said to me he is going to be grand dad ... kick into teeth and feel like all crushed x I was expecting that coz his daughter is 18 but just hoped deep inside it would of bn us first with baby then his kids .. think I wouldn't mind then but this is another heartbreak I need to overcome and really feel like run away once again ... life never stops kicking me ....

[pm27]

Hi Miroslava,

Congratulations on setting the wedding date. I hope you have fun planning for the wedding.

Life does seem to have a way of kicking us and often when we think it can't get worse something else happens.

I wish I could say something to make it better for you, I wanted you to know I am thinking of you.

[Miroslava in reply to pm27]

Thank u so much .. Yes I was very excited but feel very low now.. blame myself .. he had them long before I came into his life and now coz of our situation and me bn childless coz of him he won't be able to enjoy his grandkids .. now thinking if I want to get married really stuck in situation I can't find answers to nothing x but thank u so much for your kind words x

[nicknick]

Hi Once i read that life kicks only those who can struggle. So as it seems you are a strong and brave person, you will cope with everything.

[Speranza73]

I feel sorry for you, I have been there few times since we are looking to have a baby.

I know the sauer taste of this kick... But don't forget to love yourself, more than anything. You and only you can take and let it go.

[JB75]

Put yourself first, do everything you can to look after YOU. You are different and unique - so don't put yourself down by comparing to another. Life always finds a way of working out just the way it's supposed to x

[Miroslava]

Thank for your replies .. i had emotional break down yesterday after partners pregnant daughter came to door with hand on belly then she went out for smoke ... i was feeling like scream with anger and cried a lot... but today is next day I am very thankful for your replies .. i m going to try my best and do as you said ... we got wedding date set and family knows now it's all go with preparation and I will try and love myself and be the best possible looking bride try to lose some weight I put on for wedding and next round of Ivf and specially make our relationship lovely every day and us ready for third round of Ivf as married couple .. coz if I will continue living life like this I will end up in mad house single and maybe worse ... Ivf changed me too much I would like to be person I used to be before ...