Last IUI unsuccessful 😔 only one chance at IVF feel my hope slipping away...

[theblondeone]

Hi everyone

Sorry for the long post...

We've been trying for 4 years now with unexplained fertility issues. I've had every test under the sun & feel like the hospital is my second home as I'm there so often. I took clomid for 5 months it did nothing apart from make me crazy. Then on to IUI treatment for almost a year! Was supposed to be 3 rounds but due to over stimulation, under stimulation & cysts several rounds got cancelled so was always waiting for next month & the next month. Anyway finally had my 3rd IUI a couple weeks ago & everything went so smoothly I ovulated naturally so didn't need all the drugs, follicles were 18 & 20 & the procedure itself was a lot quicker & less uncomfortable than before. Felt like was finally going to happen. Tested this morning but was negative.

We have one chance at IVF we cannot afford to do 2nd. I've been so positive & hopeful throughout all this but now I feel our chances of this working slipping away my hope is dying.

Does IVF actually ever work on the first time?

X

[Hidden]

I'm so sorry you've had such a rough journey. I'm just starting my first IVF and am keeping everything crossed it works for us.

I'm pretty sure Buffy21 was successful on her first attempt. Am sure there will be others here that can give you a positive story too.

Wishing you all the very best of luck. Look after yourself. X

[theblondeone in reply to Hidden]

Thank you, wishing you luck to! I'm hoping in a few days I can get my positive thinking back x

[NDE1987]

Hi hun so sorry you are going through this, i had two failed IUIs last year and a failed ivf last year. Starting my second round of ivf this motnh (self funded) just wanted to say good luck with your ivf. Everyone is different, ivf has worked first time for so many ladies on here and some ladies it takes more time. Please don't compare yourself to anyone as everyone is different.happy to answer any other questions xx

[theblondeone in reply to NDE1987]

Thank you for replying. I don't know anyone personally who has had IVF & from what I've read it's really hard going. I'm just worried that if I'm not mentally strong enough it won't work. I just feel like all my positive energy has been zapped. I'm sorry you were unsuccessful last year. Can I ask did you prepare yourself to try again?

x

[NDE1987 in reply to theblondeone]

I'm not going to lie having a failure was so hard, especially because i had my hopes up they ivf would work as my cousin and aunty were successful first time. Last year was awful but i took a couple of months out and went on holiday with my husband and now i feel ready to try again. It may not work again but i don't want to look back and feel like i didn't give it a chance. Ivf is stressful because you put your life on hold for 2 months as you have to be around for injections everynight etc. But if you don't let it get to you will be ok. It made my husband and I much closer. Also i didn't find ivf painful, it's also mental stress but if you can overcome that you will be fine. If you don't feel ready for ivf yet maybe take time out until you are ready and have energy to feel like you can go through it. I'm ready for cycle 2 after having a failure in December xx

[theblondeone in reply to NDE1987]

It's good to speak to someone that has been through it. Maybe I just need a bit of time to accept this time didn't work & get over it before worrying about the next step.

Its lovely to hear that it made you & a your husband closer as I've heard it puts a lot of pressure on relationships so shows how strong you are.

Did you do anything whilst having IVF to cope with the stress?

Wishing you lots of luck x

[NDE1987 in reply to theblondeone]

It can be stressful,you face hurdles along the way. My hurdle was the hospital finding a cyst on my ovary and then thinking it may be cancerous, so i had alot to deal with during ivf and my nan became poorly and we thought she was going to make it. I remember driving back to my mum's a day after egg collection and just thinking the worst. But this time around I feel more happier and don't have any expectations at all. I wish i didn't allow myself to have expectations last year either. To cope with stress i done accpunture, but i don't feel it worked for me, instead i have joined the gym and am going to start having fertility massages. I think you can deal with stress in other ways aswell like breathing in and out, listening to soothing music, going for a walk. Stress is a big factor in life and i guess we have just been dealt the bad card for a while. Hoping we see the bright light out of the tunnel soon. Hear if you want to talk as i understand that it's hard speaking to people that don't understand. Luckily my cousin and aunty have been great as they have been in my shoes. Whereas my mum and sister don't really get it and feel like ivf is a quick fix, so i don't tend for talk in to much detail with them. It's hard though because i am close to both!! Xxx

[theblondeone in reply to NDE1987]

You have had a tough time. This fertility treatment journey is long & hard!

I'm so glad i found this site. All my friends have kids so they try to be there for me but don't get it so it's nice to speak to people who understand x

[NDE1987 in reply to theblondeone]

It's true, this site is amazing i guess we can learn anything or two from our struggles xxxx

[KiraJean]

I'm so sorry to hear all of this. You and your partner have been through a rough time. I only got one IVF cycle too and it did not work for me, BUT! It has worked first time for many people! Do not give up hope. IVF is all about hope. And it is a chance. And with fertility specialists you are often in the best of hands.

Wishing you lots of luck and baby dust! 🍀🤞❤

[theblondeone in reply to KiraJean]

Thank you for replying. I'm so sorry it didn't work for you x

I'm a strong believer in positive thinking just feel like I used all mine up. Maybe after a bit of time I can recharge & get my hope back.

[KiraJean in reply to theblondeone]

I think it is about giving yourself a break too. You are right about recharging. I needed to go on holiday and forget all about this for a while before I started feeling more like my old self.

[Cyantist]

Hi, I'm sorry you've been a tough time. We tried for over 10 years from the age of 24. Every test under the sun can back "perfect", until last year when I had tests done again and they said my egg reserve had dropped. We had tried IUI 4 times unsuccessfully a few years ago, and no explanation for why nothing worked and we'd never got a single bfp.

After being told my egg reserve was now lower we went for ivf, had one go at it, and now I'm typing this with my 2 week old daughter asleep on my chest. It can work first time! Even if nothing else has and you're really negative about it all as I was.

Good luck!!!

[theblondeone in reply to Cyantist]

So glad you got your happy ending! 😊 It's lovely to hear positive stories. X

[hellokitty33]

Hey, I'm sorry to hear things have been tough for you. This is never ever easy. You are stronger than you think and you will get through this. Take a few days to re-charge and relax and by this time next week you will have a different mindset. There are lots of positive stories out there. I had my 1st IUI 2 weeks ago, AF due tomorrow and been given a test date of next Tuesday. I've been finding it hard not to test early but the help and positive vibes from the Ladies on here have been a great help.

Good Luck and stay strong xx

[theblondeone in reply to hellokitty33]

Thank you for replying. Everyone on here is lovely & it's so nice to not feel so alone​.

Just kinda dawned on me that I feel even more emotional coz the negative result means I'm due on so I'm gonna blame hormones.

Don't test early. It won't be an accurate result. I know it's hard but be patient.

Wishing you lots of luck x

[hellokitty33 in reply to theblondeone]

You will be all over the place just now - hormones are a nightmare and have a lot to answer for. You're doing great!

Lots of hugs x

[Fely06]

Is my first IVF cycle..Everything went so smoothly ..Untill today , when I got my AF. And tomorrow was supposed to be my blood test day! How cruel is that

[hellokitty33 in reply to Fely06]

Aw, I hope you're ok. Can you have another go of IVF? I'm getting IUI. This is my 1st cycle and it was unsuccessful too, my AF showed up on time.. I understand how you feel but try to remain positive xx

[theblondeone in reply to Fely06]

😔 so cruel. Life can be so unfair. I wish you lots of luck for your 2nd cycle x

[Fely06]

Thank you for your positive thinking ! Yes, we are going to check how soon can 2nd cycle be started. I just want the magic to happen!

[SVAK]

I'm very sorry that this hasn't worked for you, I was in exactly the same boat as you last year. I had been on Clomid, had failed rounds of IUI and then we were discussing our 1 funded round. I took approx. 5 months of literally getting myself ready to start and ill be honest if I hadn't I don't think I would have been so strong and positive through it. My first IVF round failed, however I have 3 frozen eggs from it all were good quality before they went in the deep freezer and we are going to start our second attempt at the end of the month all being well. It is hard going because you do have to stick to the med routine and you have to take it easy. Everyone will experience the process differently and everyone will respond differently so you can't compare. I'm at almost 4 and half years now trying and 38 this month with a low egg reserve. As hard as it is you need to stay positive and take time out of treatment when you need to so that your body has time to recover. I always say that where the mind goes the body will follow and if you are mentally exhausted then you will see this in physical symptoms as well. I would invest in time to relax and recuperate before you start IVF. Good Luck lovely I will keep my fingers crossed for you through everything x