Hi - sorry in advance for long post!I've had a really shocking turn of events this week (I'm normally on the other forum) and hoping I can get some reassurance.
The context is that I've been TTC for 5 years and have tried IVF multiple times. Had an early natural miscarriage back in 2020. In 2021 for the first time ever carried to 12 weeks - just to learn that the baby had chromosomal problems that would mean they could not survive and leading to a termination for medical reasons at 15 weeks. The biggest trauma of my life and one I will never get over.
Moved clinics- tried embryo banking with testing. Tried this for a year. In and out of treatment. Cancelled cycles. Ovulating eggs before egg collection. Over the year got just one normal embryo. Did a bunch of other testing alongside it. The transfer of the only normal embryo didn't work.
We had one untested embryo left and this implanted in March this year but HCG was doing peculiar things and it was question mark ectopic but most likely miscarriage at 6 weeks.
We've been proactively looking at egg donation for our next steps and I've been doing lots of research, we've consulted with a few places and I've joined DCN
But on Wednesday I had a proper shock. I hadn't had my normal spotting that I get 5 days before a bleed and so I decided on the off chance to do a HPT. I cannot put into words how astounded I was when a second line appeared. What is going on?! I am absolutely terrified with my history around loss, chromosomal issues, miscarriage, query of ectopic.
I have no symptoms and this is a big big worry to me, I put myself at 4+3 today. Have had HCG done yesterday at 4+2 and it was 2000 which seemed high? I also didnt know what to do about taking my IVF medication, I've had advice to take cyclogest and aspirin but the others such as clexane and prednisolone and prontogest are up to me (if I feel they will make me less anxious).
I don't know what to make of this. Please help!
Hope everyone is good x x
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Skittles11
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Oh my gosh!! This is incredible! Your body obviously knows what it is doing my lovely 😍
I completely get your worries but maybe this one is the one?
2000 seems about right for 4+2 - mine was 1512 on day 14 after transfer so roughly the same.
If it were me, I would probably not bother with the prednisolone and clexane because you clearly don't need it for implantation! I would take the cyclogest though just for that extra bit of support.
I think unfortunately you just have to wait for the NIPT / Harmony tests for any abnormalities which I know must be so terrifying given your history - I'm so sorry I can't offer any advice on this one - I would probably be booking weekly scans if it was me!
Thank you for replying so quickly, I appreciate it. And congrats to you too!!What do you make of the no symptoms thing? I see people saying they "have no symptoms except ...." and then they go on to say all of these symptoms. In my case I don't have any. That worries me 😟
For my last pregnancy that resulted in my little boy - I 100% had nothing. No sickness, no sore boobs, I wasn't even really that tired until much much later in the pregnancy. I was so terrified that every time I went for a scan there would be nothing there, because I genuinely felt nothing - until I started feeling him move I could have sworn I wasn't pregnant.
This time I have very mild nausea which I am super grateful for - but it also comes and goes - yesterday I felt find all day - today I feel like I have a sicky knot in my stomach.
So please please don't read in to the symptoms - they just are so different for everyone.
Skittles, I am happy and anxious to read your news. Anxious because I vividly remember the fear, anxiety and insecurity. I wish there was something to take it away for us, those pregnant after loss and the ups and downs of ivf, but there is not. Happy because I am hopeful for you and your partner.
In regards to symptoms…I had none in my four pregnancies. The very only thing I remember with the first 3 was getting weirdly hungry just after the 4 week mark about when my period was supposed to come. Once I ate a whole pizza myself for dinner, haha. Only one night. It was the sudden hcg surge doing that to me as I had the same after my only one ever hcg shot before our second transfer but then I got zero sypmtoms afterwards. So you can be completely symptom free.
I cannot advise with medicines. I am sure there will be other people who can.
I am thinking of you and have my fingers and toes crossed for you. xx
Thank you pink_lemon for your lovely understanding message. I'm finding that i am so anxious I cannot concentrate on anything else. The waiting is so difficult. I will just have to wait and hope. The no symptoms thing was always going to bother me as I have never had strong symptoms before in any pregnancy and feel they would reassure me so their absence does make me worry. But it is reassuring to hear when others have had this too. I never have any symptoms before my period either so wonder if I just don't have symptoms for hormonal related surges or changes...
It is completely normal and understandable to feel like that. And it is nerve wrecking I forgot to say that no symptoms for me and some of my pregnancies ended up in miscarriages and some were successful. So the symptoms don’t say anything. Just know that you are absolutely not alone feeling like this and there is an army of women going through the same. Day by day…
Hi, firstly congratulations. 2nd take your meds. I'm pregnant via ivf 5th transfer, and on clexane, estrogen and progesterone. I've also experienced so many losses that I'm an anxious mess. I personally would say take the meds. And I hope you have a sticky bean.
Sorry that you are struggling with anxiety too. Going through losses doesn't make it easy, living in constant fear that something will go wrong, it's very hard. Take good care x x
OMG Skittles! This is crazy! Whispering congratulations. I really hope this is the one. Also just wanted to weigh in and say 2000 isn't necessarily too high. I had similar numbers at this stage and went down the Google rabbit hole worrying about it, but when I spoke to a nurse she said it was perfectly normal and can actually be a good sign. Keeping everything crossed for you. I hope you're looking after yourself. I'm sure this must be so so overwhelming. xxx
Thank you lovely. I have already been down Google rabbit hole and it never helps does it. What I don't get is how come no symptoms if HCG is 2000? Feels like there should be. This has always been a concern to me as I've never had strong symptoms and have been pregnant a few times now but with no live birth. And I know it will be what it will be but the anxiety is crippling, it's all I can think about x x
Wow, I just saw this!! This is so amazing! Such wonderful news! 😊 I'm over the moon for you!! 💗 Totally understand having concerns and worries, but everything sounds like it is going in the right direction. Hcg level sounds great! If you had any markers for APS or similar I'd definitely consider the clexane, but if not I'd stick with what your doctor recommends depending on your thoughts. Prontogest can't hurt, but I'm sure you're fine xx
I really hope so, its been the biggest shock and it would be painful to have it snatched away again. Going through so much loss really steals away any joy, it must be such a different experience for those who didnt struggle and found themselves pregnant. I preciously had a bunch of testing and tested positive for the MTFHR c1286a variant. What are the other markers for APS? I've had so many tests but struggling to find results for that one. X x
It's really hard to enjoy what is normally great news, I agree. I'm rooting for you! 💕
APS would be things like anti-cardiolipin antibody, lupus anticoagulant antibody. Maybe you had a RI run it. Some other blood related ones would be Factor V Leiden, and PAI 4g/5g test. Did they tell you for the MTHFR to take methyl folate? I don't know much about MTHFR honestly as I don't have any variants xx
This is unexpected and delightful news 🥰 Congratulations, though I understand your anxiety. HCG numbers sound amazing. Fingers crossed this is the one 🤞🤞🤞
Skittles11 oh my goodness what a shock this must be after everything you have been through. I’m sending you my gentle congratulations & am so pleased for you ❤️. I know you will be so anxious, terrified & over analysing everything after suffering losses & going through medical termination. It will be impossible not to feel on edge.
In regards to symptoms, sometimes the ivf meds may cause the majority of symptoms we think are pregnancy related. Until further along when you may get the typical symptoms.
I would start Cyclogest with your history, it’s a bit of reassurance & won’t cause any harm. Aspirin I was started on at 7 wks. I know this can be taken earlier.
Hopefully you can get to speak to your clinic or gp for further advice regarding the meds. & if you explain your history & how anxious you are about everything they may be able to help.
I know it’s early days but I believe this is a true miracle & I am really happy for you. Wishing everything goes well xxx
Thank you butterfliez yes I am absolutely terrified, it is crippling, I know you'll be able to relate to those feelings. The lack of symptoms just exacerbates it as well but I appreciate your reassurance on that one. I am getting advice from my IVF clinic about medications and they will be able support me I think with quite a bit of stuff. The HCG came back yesterday and had doubled just within the 48 hours so I am trying to take that as reassurance as well x
Skittles! Omg, what crazy, wonderful news! I also fell pregnant naturally after 5 years, 3 ivf cycles and 3 miscarriages and it’s a wild feeling. Though the anxiety is def very real. I’m sending you calming thoughts.💛 Don’t worry yourself about no symptoms. 4+2 is very early to feel anything tbh. And even though morning sickness is the “common” symptom in early pregnancy, 25-30% of women don’t ever experience it and go on to have healthy pregnancies.
As for the meds, I can’t speak to the prednisolone and clexane, but I was worried about my progesterone being too low so I had it tested privately (alongside hcg) at 4 weeks, 5 weeks, and 6 weeks. I was just looking for it to be over 60 nmol each time, which it was, so I didn’t feel the need to supplement with additional.
Thank you, I really appreciate your reply and your calming thoughts which I truly need right now. My mind is in a proper spin! I think I've been burnt so many times that my mind doesn't seem to be able to allow me to think that it might be okay - I guess its a protective mechanism. I'm at 4+4 now and still no symptoms, I know rationally that not everyone gets them but i do think it's something a lot of us look to as a symbol of reassurance. I'm glad you had a happy turn of events in the end after your journey, sounds like you'd been trying for a similar amount of time to me with the 5 years x x
congratulations on your little surprise and I’ll be keeping everything crossed for you! I was anxious my whole pregnancy and didn’t have any early pregnancy symptoms. I had a friend with terrible sickness throughout and I weirdly envied her for the reassurance that must have given her. Good luck xx
Can totally relate to this, I want the symptoms even though they must be terrible to experience. I just think they may play a part in reassuring me but then I may panic about them if I had them as well... x x thank you for your message
wow lovely! This is bonkers! But exciting! Whoop! I wouldn’t worry about no symptoms… I didn’t really have any until 8 weeks and they only lasted a week! Heaps of luck, crossing everything for you xx
Thanks I appreciate it. Did you feel anxious when you had symptoms at 8 weeks and they just lasted a week? I think I am anxious because in all 3 of my losses I had barely any symptoms so I therefore associate lack of symptoms to negative outcome if that makes sense. X x
ah fingers crossed. All sounds positive. I was 2144 at 15 days on my successful fet. So sounds good. Also I genuinely had zero symptoms until 8 weeks. Literally nothing. I kinda just felt very well. Then I projectile vomitted every day from 8-22 weeks! So wait… I’m sure it’ll come.
You’re pregnant!! I fully appreciate with your backstory this must be making you very anxious, but I think you need to roll with it- your body has picked a strong egg! How exciting!!
I agree about the Prednisolone and clexane- they were my first thoughts when I found myself in this situation- you probably don’t need them for natural conception. As for symptoms, soooo many people get none and you’re so tuned in to spot every tiny twinge when you’ve done IVF, natural isn’t quite the same!
If the disbelief ever wears off (it won’t!), just try to sit back and enjoy it day by day. Wishing you all the luck in the world, you’ve got this 🤞🤞🤞 xxx
I suspect you'll be able to massively identify with all of this NemoFish the anxiety is overwhelming, I need to try and find ways to take my mind of it. I think it's inevitable to always be there because I've never had a pregnancy end the way I want and this is my 4th one. But I also want to keep the hope alive and not just spend every day in an anxious state! Did you experience strong feeling of anxiety and what did you do to cope? I think I'm just very aware that everything could come crashing down at any time and I am no stranger to loss, its all I've ever known in a pregnancy sense. X xHow are things going for you now btw?
I spent weeks and weeks petrified. I bled a lot and whilst I had a couple of early scans which helped, it still never totally put my mind at ease. I refused to believe it pretty much my entire pregnancy. I think infertility conditions you to put up a barrier with these things to protect yourself.
Hindsight is a wonderful thing and now I’m very close to the end (due Tuesday), looking back I wish I’d let myself accept it earlier on and try to enjoy it. I’ve been so reluctant to buy anything or talk to anyone about it. That would be my biggest piece of advice, or at least what I wish I’d done myself, is to have some faith and believe it! These miracles actually can happen, I would’ve been these first to say “yes to other people”! Your HCG results are very good, I’d definitely take comfort from those. I don’t think the anxiety will ever truly pass entirely, but it gets easier. Honestly when I saw your post yesterday I did a double take when I saw which forum it was in and it made my day to read! Xx
Hey Skittles, how wonderful... appreciate you're terrified. Pregnancy after loss is always scary and the shock of it happening naturally onto of everything.....well I'm not surprised you're reeling. I've Jo advice unfortunately but to try to take one day at a time. As for the no symptoms thing.....I didn't have any symptoms at all with twins. No sickness, sore boobs, nothing which is not very reassuring at all. I guess what I'm saying is these things being missing mean nothing. Can you have a few hCG for reassurance in the first instance and perhaps an early scan or two? Good luck, I'll be thinking of you.xxx
Hello Cinderella5 thank you so much for your kind message. Were you worried yourself when you didn't have symptoms? I have had one repeat HCG which I have written below and it is between 47 and 48 hours doubling time. I felt reassured by the nurse in the moment when I learnt the result and now (the next day) really anxious again. But I think even I repeated several HCGs I'd still be worried because of my history. I just feel very normal at the moment, was it the same for you at tjis stage (between 4 and 5 weeks)? X x
I was absolutely petrified, I was so sure something must be wrong if I didn't have any symptoms. It didn't help that all the healthcare professionals kept saying, oh its twins...you must be feeling so ill.🙄 I had a few hCG done then got my date for an early scan at 7wks. The days leading up to then felt like an eternity, then like you it feels OK for a day and the worry comes back. You do manage to keep plodding on but it's mentally draining and tiring but you get there. I had my little milestones....like when I got my 12 week scan I booked a private one in between. Then did the same again between that and my 20wk scan. You really juat have to do what you need to for peace of mind. Hugs.xxx
Hi there. Although I didn’t have a genetic issue most of my eggs were chromosomally abnormal because of my age. I naturally conceived at 41 and this resulted in a missed miscarriage. We found out at the 12 week scan that there was no heartbeat. I then naturally conceived at 43 and had another missed miscarriage at 8 weeks. In between the pregnancies we tried IVF which didn’t work for us due to age and low AMH. Just when we had given up and we were going to go down the donor egg route I learnt the day before my 44th birthday that I was pregnant. We didn’t expect the pregnancy to go anywhere due to our past experiences however we were blessed with a healthy little boy who is now 16 months. My pregnancy was full of anxiety and I had a lot of private scans for reassurance. I also didn’t have any pregnancy related symptoms which made it hard and because of the position of my placenta I couldn’t really feel him move until beyond 24 weeks and even then it was faint. However in the end it was all fine. I took cyclogest for 13/14 weeks and aspirin (150mg) throughout my pregnancy as per my consultant’s advice. I wish you the best of luck. X
Thank you for your reply and sharing some of what you went through. I am sorry you experienced losses as well, its really tough, but I am so pleased to hear you now have a 16 month year old. You couldnt make up the timing could you, the fact you were looking at donor eggs and got a positive test the day before your 44th birthday! The lack of symtoms is one thing which I find really quite stressful, I would prefer to have them as some form of reassurance I guess. I have been taking cyclogest and a couple of other things and will have to just hope for the best. Every day seems like such a long time to get through right now x x
I, too, found the lack of symptoms anxiety inducing. It was absolutely crazy as medically my eggs should have been inferior aged 43/44 than when I was 41 but miracles do happen. In fact I was due to start the process to have the donor conceived embryo put back 3 days after I found out I was pregnant. It really does only take one good egg. Wishing you lots and lots of luck. X
oh gosh indeed!!! Just to reassure you a little, I am older and also got a shock natural pregnancy with good encouraging HCG results, all turned out well as I am sure it will for you. Congratulations!
wow! I have just seen this and it has made my day!! 😀I am soooo happy for you! ❤️ Gentle congratulations! The HCG with my son was 240 on OTD and he was OK, so that seems a good HCG to me!
If I were you, based on your history, I would personally take the cyclogest too and try to book an early scan and/ or take other HCG blood tests.
Hey lovely. Hope you are doing well? Thank you for your supportive message. I took a second HCG blood test and the doubling time was between 47 and 48 hours. You know what it's like though, I'm still really worried, I know you can relate that when you've had significant loss in your history you are really on edge about things going wrong. It's paralysing really. I am taking the cyclogest though x x
I know all those feelings far too well, sadly... Excitement, anxiety, worry, hope, disbelief, shock, happiness... all at the same time. But you are pregnant!! 😍and I am so happy for you. My advice would be take a day at a time, a day at a time and I will always be here if you need someone to talk to who understands how you are feeling. All my love xxx
Looks spot on! This is wonderful news. Regarding the no symptoms, I didn't really have any for either pregnancy until about 6 weeks, then the nausea kicked in like nobody's business. It's reasurring but also miserable having nausea (I had to be signed off work for a bit) so honestly try to enjoy no symptoms as it may change soon! xx
Thank you Purpledoggy ! I imagine the symptoms can be really debilitating but I think for me I'd find them reassuring too. Maybe I just need to be more patient x x
Amazing news! BTW I don't think I really had symptoms that weren't related the massive amounts of progesterone I was taking until about 6 or 7 weeks. xxx
OMG - I’ve just seen this!!!!! Massive congratulations - such wonderful news. I know you must be anxious - I hope you’re ok. I have everything crossed for you ❤️❤️❤️
Aw thank you Football61 I am very anxious but I would expect nothing different so I think I just need to accept that I am going to be anxious. And try and do things to occupy myself. Thank you so much for your message x
You've had lots of advice so I'm simply here to send you all my love and best wishes. You've supported so many of us with your kind messages and you deserve this to be your time. I can only imagine the anxiety you must be feeling but I hope you are able to take it a day at a time. Congratulations! Xxxx
That means a lot, thank you. I need to try and focus on taking it a day at a time, you're so right on that one. Rather than thinking of all the what ifs. I hope you are doing as well as possible as I know you've had a really tough time recently x x
That is an incredible good news! Please, please, please stop worrying, I know is hard but believe me what our body do naturally cannot be compared with IVF. From my experience I can tell you that after having my beautiful twins though IVF, I fallen pregnant naturally and I am now 23 weeks pregnant 🥰♥️. I had no symptoms at all until week 6 and I was exactly the same like you could not believe that I was pregnant! I said to my husband that for the first time in this life I don't believe HPT's as I don't feel anything. Your symptoms may come later on. I also didn't want to do a blood test, I decided that nature knows better what to do. Congratulations and miracles do happen!!! Take care of yourself 🥰 and leave anxiety aside, this is a unique moment that you will regret later on for not enjoying every bit of it!!! You can do it!!! 😘 Lots of love 💕
wow! Amazing news, Skittles! Try to hang in there as the days pass by. Easier said than done I know! I’m really routing for you and your little bean xx
I think 2000 is a gd number. I didn't have symptoms when I did my FET and even though I was successful. Not everyone gets symptoms of pregnancy. Only at 7w I started having nausea. Whether to take meds I think you should check with your Dr.
Hey! Fantastic news. Can completely understand the nervousness and anxiety around this. I don't really have any answer for you but "try" to focus on the positives. Have always heard people say every pregnancy is different and each person and their body reacts differently. Everything crossed for you and genuinely hope its your time..prayers always. Look after yourself xx
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I forgot to say that no symptoms for me and some of my pregnancies ended up in miscarriages and some were successful. So the symptoms don’t say anything. Just know that you are absolutely not alone feeling like this and there is an army of women going through the same. Day by day…
x x
6 weeks and bleeding red
6weeks +6days pregnant-no symptoms
5 weeks + 6 days sac and yolk but no embryo 💔
IVF Pregnancy anxiety
Antenatal care UK
