It's now less than 2 weeks until I get my Mirena inserted, and I'm dreading it. The talk from my doctor has only made it worse! The last internal exam I had was a nightmare, so painful, and I'm worried that this will be just as bad if not worse. I made the mistake of looking online, and the horror stories I've read are enough to put me off. However, the pill has not worked for me and the last laparoscopy didn't remove the pain, so it is worth a try.
I'm also really sad and confused about the whole not having children thing. Despite knowing I'm getting it for endo and not contraception the gp talked about me having to be really sure I don't want to have a family before she puts it in, because she's not planning to take it out anytime soon. I'm 37, I know that I've left it too late now and that I've never been that bothered about having kids, but it feels so final to admit that out loud and say that it's never going to happen. I hope that makes sense to someone, 'cause I'm not sure that it does to me. At the end of the day, there is no way that I'm going to go back to how I was before, and for that I need to keep taking hormones. Therefore no babies. But I can at least hold down a job, and I've been able to return to some of my hobbies again (when the pain allows).
Thanks for listening. My partner does his best, but he really doesn't fully get it, and I don't want to talk to my mum because I know she's hoping for grandchildren and I can't bear her disappointment,