Terrified to have my Laparoscopy! - Endometriosis UK

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Terrified to have my Laparoscopy!

Bobby101 profile image
19 Replies

Hi All,

I'm new to the site but I am so glad that I have found it as i really need some advice on my up-coming Laparoscopy.

Surprisingly enough im not actually scared about the surgery itself, I am terrified of the result. As much as I don't not want to have Endometriosis and wouldn't wish this pain on anybody, I really can't think of anything worse than been told that I don't have it and they found nothing at all.

I have spent years and years in agony with these awful symptoms and when I first heard of Endometriosis I was CONVINCED that I must have it. I have spent months now pushing for my GP and consultant to take me seriously and let me have the Lap but now it has come to it I'm becoming more and more convinced that it could all be in my head.

If the Lap comes back clear it really will be the end of the road for me. There are no more tests, scans or appointments I can bare to try. The sheer embarrassment of this operation telling me that I'm perfectly healthy is completely putting me off! I can't bare to find out that it is all in my head after the amount of time I have had of work, doctors I have argued with and people I have let down! I don't want to seem like somebody who just can't 'Handle' pain. I am desperate for an answer.

Has anybody ever felt like this in the weeks leading up to their Lap? Like the pressure to prove to yourself and everybody else that you really are ill, isn't even worth going through with the OP for?

Really hoping someone can understand the thought that are going through my head right now and give me some advice on what to do?

Thank you. x

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Bobby101
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19 Replies
Filmgirl101 profile image
Filmgirl101

No advice! Mine is on Friday and I'm scared out of my wits!

Bobby101 profile image
Bobby101 in reply to Filmgirl101

Good luck, I hope it all goes okay and you get the answers that you are looking for. :) xx

Hi I got diagnosed with Endometriosis in March last year after years of going to the doctors. I was relieved to find out I had it as I was convinced my GP thought I was exaggerating the pain and symptoms I had.

I felt exactly the same before the operation and thought I was going to be wasting everyone's time by having the laparoscopy done. But you know your own body and when there is something not quite right.

Hope this helps a little :)

Bobby101 profile image
Bobby101 in reply to

Thank you for replying!

Its comforting to know that im not the only person to think/feel this way. What symptoms did you have if you dont mind me asking?

Fingers crossed that I get some sort of answers even if that dosen't end up been Endo!

Thanks again- take care. :) x

in reply to Bobby101

I had painful periods, my hormones were very up and down so I got quite depressed, pain two weeks before periods, back pain and bloating.

Bobby101 profile image
Bobby101 in reply to

ah right, they are similar to my symptoms. I'm confident this pain isnt in my head.. like you said we know our own bodies best! Thank you

in reply to Bobby101

Yeh it's not easy getting a diagnosis but you will get there Xx

Hope everything goes well on Friday,I was absolutely terrified having mine done as I hate needles but I got through it and it wasn't actually as bad as I thought.

Good Luck

Cmosh2010 profile image
Cmosh2010

Good luck for Friday / I had mine done Saturday and had exactly the same fears.

Gynae didn't want to do the lap because she was 'sure' I didn't have endo. When I came round she saw me to say actually I had fairly extensive endo that she removed. Like you said we know our own bodies and it was good to know it wasn't in my head!

I won't lie I've found it tough after the lap, but everyone is different. Wind eze has been a god send (for gas pains) as has peppermint tea and paramol! Sleeping upright helps too and walkinga round as much as possible.

Hope it all goes well for you x

Bobby101 profile image
Bobby101 in reply to Cmosh2010

Thank you so much for your reply. I appreciate it.

God it's so crap that doctors and consultants just decide we don't have Endo without even checking! It makes you doubt yourself so much more! I bet you were so relieved to get some answers!

Hope you are feel better soon :) xx

Endo101 profile image
Endo101

I think everyone feels this way. However, I personally haven't found since being diagnosed GPs etc have taken me any more seriously. I do feel that it is seen as just women's problems or some minor condition.

Also remember this is for you; not about what others think. I had been told for years my pain was normal or that some just aren't as good at dealing with it. I knew there was something more than that. As it turned out I had mild to moderate endo with adhesions affecting a large section of my abdomen! It was actually worse than I thought.

At the end of the day, everyone knows their bodies more than anybody else. Unless having experienced something yourself, it's difficult for others to imagine the level of pain you experience.

Bobby101 profile image
Bobby101 in reply to Endo101

Thank you, that has been really helpful.

I think I have just thought it over so much I have almost convinced myself that it must be in my head! It's a comforting feeling to know I am not the only person who has had this thought process before their Lap. I really did think I was going insane!

What were your symptoms if you don't mind me asking?

Thanks again, hope you are doing well. :)xx

Endo101 profile image
Endo101 in reply to Bobby101

Yes I had also convinced myself it was in my head by the end! Even considered cancelling a week before because I thought I would be wasting their time and money!

My symptoms were originally severe period pains to the point I could not walk and would violently shake in pain after going to the toilet on my period, vomiting, not cramps but a sharp localised pain in lower right abdomen that felt like I had been stabbed or had an appendicitis. Had similar but less severe symptoms on ovulation. During the first one to two days of my periods, I couldn't go to school. I had to lie in bed and stay completely still. The pill controlled this though when I went on it. Over time I developed problems outside of my period - nausea every day, vomiting, loss of appetite, low resistance to infections, extreme tiredness, pain on activity with my partner and alternating constipation and diarrhoea. I said I thought I had endo affecting my digestive system, I was told it's rare and wouldn't cause vomiting or nausea. Then when I finally got offered a lap, I asked if they would check around my digestive system and they said no just around the bladder and reproductive areas. Anyway when I had the lap, they found a set of adhesions from my uterus, tube, bowel and abdominal wall which was so substantial that they ended up checking right up to my diaphragm!

I would always say trust your gut instinct. Even if you don't get diagnosed, it doesn't mean you don't have a problem. It may be a hormonal imbalance or you can actually have endo in places which cannot be seen easily.

Once I had come around properly from the anaesthetic, I remember crying, not so much about the diagnosis (although I wish I didn't have it and it is awful) but because of what I had been through to get answers. It was finally a recognition yes this wasn't in your head, yes you were right, yes you stood your ground and you finally have an answer and an end to a 5 year battle of trying to get yourself believed.

shazlovesevo profile image
shazlovesevo

I was exactly the same, I just kept telling my family that I was so scared that they wouldn't find anything and that it was all in my head but... i was diagnosed with moderate endometriosis 2 years ago.

You know your own body & know when something isn't quite right!

Good luck with everything on Friday, let me know how things go?

All the best and big hugs!💛💛

Bobby101 profile image
Bobby101 in reply to shazlovesevo

Thank you so much. Regained a little sanity from knowing I'm not the only person to feel this way!!

It's sad that so many people have doubted their own pain this much! I almost feel like I have something to prove to people!

Hope you are okay 😘Xxx

shazlovesevo profile image
shazlovesevo in reply to Bobby101

I think it's because, say for instance, if you go into hospital or the doctor tells you what's wrong and you need surgery for something, you believe the doctor, but when the doctors are doubting what you feel, that makes things 10x worse!

Please let me know how you get on hun, hope your surgery and recovery goes well 💛💛

Bobby101 profile image
Bobby101 in reply to shazlovesevo

Thanks so much for been so understanding! I really appreciate it.

I will let you know how i get on. :) Just waiting for a Lap date to come through the post now so fingers crossed i aren't waiting too long for it!!

Thank you lovely! xx

Kayleighjanek profile image
Kayleighjanek

This is exactly how I feel. My lap isn't until 22nd feb, I had to postpone due to a holiday. I hope everything goes well tomorrow. Please keep us updated xx

Kayleighjanek profile image
Kayleighjanek

Good luck today Hun xx

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