Having a really hard week, after a really hard few months (well, years actually). Had to give up my career in 2011 and have been vaguely self employed since then. That went down a lot in early 2014 when my mum was diagnosed with terminal cancer. Haven't done any work since April, lost my mum in May and my endo and ME is flaring up badly (waiting for a lap date any day now). Last week my husband and I went to paris - I coped quite well but my period started on the Sunday night and since we got back on Monday I've either been in bed or on the sofa. I've done nothing constructive all week - the pain and the fatigue have been awful and I'm really low. Feel like I'm going nuts - I have so much to do and I've done none of it.
If I read this from someone else, I'd tell them to stop being so hard on themselves, that they've overdone it and need to rest. Why can't I tell myself the same thing? I hate being unproductive, especially when there's so much I need to do, but can't bring myself to do any of it.
Please tell me I'm not alone.