Endometriosis UK

Lap question

Hi girls,

I am having my first lap next week. At pre-op they told me I wasn't allowed anyone to wait with me before surgery. Is this normal? I know it isn't major surgery but I am really nervous about anaesthetic!!! I have been to support other people when they have ops and don't see why the hospital are being so cruel, lol.

Any lap tips would be greatly welcomed :) xx

13 Replies

Hi Magnetta,

I haven't a clue why the hospital would tell you that you can't have anyone with you before surgery? I have had two laps and my husband was present for both, right up until I went into theatre. I was terrified of everything, from the anaesthetic to just being in hospital so it's totally normal that you should want support. No matter what your age, hospitals are scary! lol Regardless of whether it's a major operation or not, that shouldn't come into it!

If I were you, I would ring the hospital and explain to them that you need support, they must have a waiting room you can both sit in? I know that you're not allowed to have anyone at your bedside whilst waiting for your op, but in a waiting room on the ward should be fine!!

It's a stressful enough time as it is without added stresses. Good luck for next week, I'm sure you will be absolutely fine, the build up to going into hospital is far more scary than on the actual day!

Keep in touch

Kelly xx



As Kelly has said, theres no reason why you wouldn't be allowed anyone with you. When i went in last week by boyfriend stayed with all the way up until i was taken into the anaesthetic room! I was so nervous, i came out in a rash and my heart rate was so high, but i don't know why i was so worried about it all. The two men who were my anaesthetists were so so nice, calmed me right down!! And when i woke up and felt sick and in pain, the nurses couldn't have been nicer.

Honestly you'll be fine :) Just make sure you take it easy when you get out. The gas pain in your shoulders is pretty nasty but mine went within about 12 hours. I put some heat pads onto my shoulder and this helped.

Also ensure that you have someone with you for the first few days, and definitely when you take a shower, as you'll feel a little faint. Other than that i can't really think.. other than again...take it easy!!! nothing more important than that!! it may only be a minor op, but you've got to remember there going internally, and so stretching and bending is going to be sore!

Good Luck :) and let us know how you get on, or if you have any more questions.

Emma Xx


Hi hope you are well,

The hospital i was due to have my lap with told me the same thing. Obviously i was not happy about that at all with it being my first operation. At pre op i was told under no circumstances could anyone stay with me but i called them n quoted the letter which did say 'unless prior arrangement has been agreed'.

They said that my partner could stay after i explained my anxiety to them.

Hope this helps x



I was told exactly the same thing a couple of weeks ago when I had my Lap. They made me say goodbye to my partner at the doors of the clinic. They then said, he could come and be with me as soon as the doctors and surgeons had been in to see me, they said it was because of crowding. I ended up being first in, so he didn't make it back to be with me, and then I had to text him myself to say he could come and get me!

I think it depends on how busy the hospital is, but just insist that you want someone with you, the nurses are always so kind and understanding, and they won't want to add any stress to an already stressful situation.

All the best with it! X


Thank you so much for your lovely replies. Really means a lot to know I am not just being dramatic!

How long did it take you to recover?

Thanks again girlies xxx



I think it depends on what hospital its at. My first lap at Warwick I was allowed someone with me right until I went down for surgery, and to be there whilst I recovered. I assumed it would be the same with my 2nd and so my partner came with me, but as soon as we checked in at reception, he was told he wasn't allowed up to the ward as it was female only and that he could come and collect me 5 hours later! I was so shocked and stressed about the op that I burst into tears (pretty embarrassing as I'm 29!) The nurse was sweet and allowed him up for 10 mins before I went down and then for another 10 mins after Id come round, but not quite the same. I wish this had been communicated before, and then I would have taken a female friend with me instead. Maybe call them and ask? Good luck with the op, I was back on my feet (slowly!) after 3 - 5 days and back to work within 10 days, but wasn't back to normal as it were for around 3 weeks. xx


Thank you :) I am so grateful to everyone's comments. They are so useful and reassuring. I am 25 and think I will cry,I am super emotional at the best if of times hehe x


Hello ;)

I have had 2 ops now (one lap and one other diagnostic procedure) which were both at the Birmingham treatment centre. Because the ward was a day case unit and a sterile surgical unit relatives and friends weren't allowed on it. I had to be dropped off at 7am and then I was shown to my bed and was on my own which was scary but the nurses were so nice and tried to put me at ease the best they could. There wasn't a waitin room on the ward so there was nowhere for my partner to wait unfortunately. I understood why it had to be that way but I wish someone could have been there with me :/ however both times I was treated really well and had no problems and have always had very funny anesnetisers who put me at ease too :)

I've got another lap next week in a different hospital so hopefully they aren't as strict.

Afterwards make sure you drink enough water. The painkillers dehydrate you which leads to constipation so keep hydrated and try to stay away from stodgy food, like bread and pasta, for a couple of days as you may become a little 'blocked up' for want of a better word :p peppermint tea is good for the shoulder pain and if you have anyone to look after you then let them. I am terrible for getting bored and trying to do it myself but after this kind of op it is really important to take it slowly and rest and heal. I always have something nice to eat in the house for the first couple of days and then I switch to eating really healthily to aid recovery. I have also got a big stack of DVDs at the ready for when I get back from hospital. On my 'to do' list before the op I have:

- Tidy and clean the house really well (so I feel happy and not worried about tidying up)

- get all my comfy clothes out and somewhere easy to reach (these include big knickers as they are comfier)

- do a food shop and stock up on sanitary pads (you will bleed after the op)

- pack hospital bag with comfy clothes for after, try to avoid anything that presses on your waist, like jeans for example

- make sure my favorite bedding is all washed and ready for when I get back (small things can make you feel better :)

- stockpile magazines I like to read

Moving around a little, if you can, helps with the trapped gas. I try to shuffle between rooms every few hours. Sleep if you feel you need to (I don't like napping so have to force myself). Let people look after you and don't over do it :)

Best of luck! I'll be thinking of you xx

1 like


Thank you so much for your reply. It sounds just the same, mine is in North Hampshire Diagnostic Treatment Centre. I feel like I know exactly what will happen now and it is such a comfort :) Such great tips! I will be referring back to this

How long did it take for your stitches to dissolve?xx


Hi, I had my op on 6th June. I was on a surgical day unit, nobody was allowed in. They let my partner walk to desk and that was it. He could only come back on to fetch me. There was a young girl on my ward 19 never had an operation and was beside herself (I remember having my first endo op at 17 and I'd have gone mental if my mum had left me). Luckily nurses let me sit with her and she went down before me and we met back on the ward. I was annoyed that later that day the second lot came on the ward for their ops and one had a mum who was a nurse so she could stay on the ward?!

As for recovery, I was told try peppermint tea it really does help and also helps with bowels (sorry if tmi). I'm two weeks tomorrow and still struggling, so it really does depend on personal experience. The nurse told me upto 3wks for dissolvable stitches. Good luck to you.


I was told the same thing at my pre-op. I was really nervous and would of loved my mum to be there.

BUT... to be honest the operation and hospital experience was really not that bad for me. By the time I had got in, got changed into my robe and comedy DVT socks, peed into a cup, was weighed, spoke to the nurse, surgeons and anaesthetist, I only had about ten minutes to read a magazine before I had my operation. I was the second to go in so the wait may be longer for others but it seemed most people on my ward did not have long to wait.

It is natural to be scared and nervous. I had to do breathing exercises and a bit of 'meditation' beforehand to stop myself from going over the edge and freaking out.

Once I was in there, before and after my op, I really didn't have much time to think about the fact no one was with me. The only time I would of really liked my mum there was when the consultant came round afterwards to talk to me. I wasn't really able to take in what she was telling me and then the system was broken to give me my discharge notes so I am having to wait to my 6 week follow up appointment to find out exactly what the outcome was!

There was a girl who insisted on having her partner there, the hospital were understanding and took them to a room to discuss it and then he was allowed in. I am sure if you speak to whoever is in charge of the ward and explain any reasons why you really need someone with you, then they will allow it. I think they just try to avoid unnecessary over crowding and probably find people are much calmer without someone around (I kinda think if my mum was there I might of started bawling my eyes out! haha).

Good luck with your lap, you will be fine. Just take everything easy and slowly whilst in the hospital and during your recovery. X


Thank you all :)

I have one more question. Did you get given any painkillers? They have also told me that they will not give me anything. The strongest stuff I currently have is mefenamic acid which doesn't do much! I just read on another post that someone used liquid morphine post lap. That seems rather extreme x


I was given morphine when I came round after the op. That only really lasted for about 5 hours after my op. They gave me co-dydramol and ibuprofen to take when I left the hospital (I was in for day surgery). That lasted me 4 days, by then the worst of the pain had passed and I just bought so over the counter co-codamol and also took ibuprofen to last till the pain had gone.


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