Ahrgh I hate myself right now. I´m kicking my best friend out of my flat late at night, because I can´t stand company right now..I can´t focus on the film we are watching and I suddenly feel like shit. I´ve been feeling better the last couple of days but now I realised that I´m not back to my normal self yet. Though I sooo want to be. I love him and our friendship and now he is mad at me for making him leave. And he keeps asking me questions about why I feel the way I do and I can´t answer. This second episode of depression in my life came out of the blue to me. Why can´t I just be okay again?