The elusive last run...

[SunnyMummy]

I'm posting on here today out of sheer frustration & because I know that you boys & girls will understand! I have one run left to do of the programme, being w9r3 of course, but circumstances have conspired against me & so rather than completing it a week or so ago, I only managed one run last week - albeit a good one - & one the week before (following the 5k Race for Life that I'd done a few days previously). Today would normally have been my one indoor run day at the gym, but there was no way I could go & do anything worthwhile. There's been a few different things messing up my routine but for the last 5 days I have been battling what is apparently viral conjunctivitis, sending me very uncomfortably almost blind in one eye & now a bit achy & tired generally too.

My frustration is not just that I haven't 'graduated' yet of course, but that I'm actually missing my runs. I really felt like I'd got a handle on this whole running thing this time last week, & just want to do it again. And yet apart from not being able to see properly & being a bit headachy, the idea of expending any energy on anything other than getting by with my two very small children right now is just a non-starter. I just don't want this to set me back. Though I guess even if it does, it doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things. You see for me now, it's not so much about what my body looks like but what it can do, & this programme has been a springboard for me to get into running as a life thing, not a 9-week thing. I've already done my 5k. I've already battled the anxiety of getting out the door in the first place & putting myself out there. So I guess my biggest frustration is not actually that it doesn't say 'graduate' after my name yet, but that I haven't started my 'post-graduate' running career yet. I want my 30 minute runs to be my normal baseline now & start building up some speed or tackle more hilly terrain. I just want to get on with it!

(Ok note to self: I had flu then pneumonia just 4 months ago & the recovery time is estimated to be 6 months. The fact that I've dragged myself off the couch to build up to jog for a full 5k & two subsequent 30 minute stints is already good going. It will be ok. I will get back out there...)

[Jewel84 Graduate]

Don't beat yourself up about it. You've done really well to get anything done at all. I had pneumonia 2 years ago and my GP advised that it'd take a couple of years for my lungs to fully recover. Just take it slowly. You can add 'graduate' to your name all in good time 👌🏼🏃🏼‍♀️💪🏼

[SunnyMummy Graduate in reply to Jewel84]

Aww thanks Jewel84. I think the thing was I wasn't expecting much of myself initially partly because I was so unfit (hence the programme) but also having just been ill. Then I found that actually, although it took determination, I could do it. So to now be put off by a gammy eye just seems ridiculous! I'm going to attempt my 'last' run on Wednesday though no matter what. If I can do it, great. If it's too much, then I'll just try again Friday 😉

[runlikeagirl Graduate]

Oh dear! That sounds frustrating fingers and toes crossed for Wednesday. You will get there ... and beyond!

[SunnyMummy Graduate in reply to runlikeagirl]

Yep, it really is! Thank you x

[IannodaTruffe Mentor]

You sound like a woman with spirit and determination and a sensible head. Of course we understand your need to have a good moan and this is the place to come and do it. As you say, in the grand scheme of things this delay is minimal but nonetheless frustrating. I wish I had discovered running at an earlier age, like you, but planning to make this a lifetime habit is empowering and you and your family will gain so much from it in years to come.

I am a hay fever sufferer and the most debilitating symptom, when I was younger, was the allergic conjunctivitis and this is the peak time for it. Just a thought if it recurs next year. Apparently there is a huge increase in the number of sufferers over the last few years.

You will soon be out there, with graduate after your name and burning up the miles. Best wishes. Set up the graduate run to be special.

Keep running, keep smiling.

[SunnyMummy Graduate in reply to IannodaTruffe]

Thank you. And I'm 43 don't you know, so hardly coming to this fresh-faced myself but hey, age is but a number & all that. I guess the good thing about this forum is that people do understand our frustrations. Good grief, I was almost going to add 'unlike non-runners' there!

Yes I wondered about it being hayfever induced as the pollen count has been so very high here. I've been told slightly different things by the pharmacist, two doctors & optician that I've ended up seeing (albeit blurrily). I am going to try antihistamines tonight & tomorrow out of curiosity. Thanks for the advice. ☺

[Millsie-J Graduate in reply to SunnyMummy]

Since turning to soya milk and yogurt rather than dairy based three years ago, i have not suffered my usual hayfever problem .

Might be worth a try 🏃🏻🏃🏻‍♀️

[SunnyMummy Graduate in reply to Millsie-J]

I never knew there was a connection? How bizarre.

[Oldfloss Administrator Graduate]

Be kind to yourself... you are there.... just go with the flow and heal properly!

[SunnyMummy Graduate in reply to Oldfloss]

Thank you OldFloss, wise as always ☺

[Oldfloss Administrator Graduate in reply to SunnyMummy]

x

[KLHg Graduate]

Stop being so hard on yourself!! Talk about determination. See how you feel, Good luck for Wednesday but if you're not up to the big one this week- who cares, a few days is neither here nor there. With your spirit that graduate badge will be yours very soon!!!

[SunnyMummy Graduate in reply to KLHg]

Aww thanks, that's such a positive response to my moaning! ☺

[Millsie-J Graduate in reply to SunnyMummy]

You will do it when the time is right, you are a runner!

[Rignold]

Haven't you answered your own problem in your post? It's a marathon not a sprint. It's a lifestyle change not a quick fix programme. That's the most difficult thing for people to grasp and you clearly have, so, this week, next week, what does it matter.

Besides, maybe it does already say Graduate after your name and you just can't see it because of the pinkeye.

[SunnyMummy Graduate in reply to Rignold]

Thanks Rignold, & yes I think I was thinking (typing) out loud! I know it's all ok, but I'm frustrated nonetheless & each day longer that this goes on is just more infuriating. I've made my mind up to run tomorrow though as normal even if I have to dose up on paracetamol & wear an eye patch! 😉

[McFitty Graduate]

SunnyMummy you're doing great! A vent is necessary sometimes. The runs are all waiting for you and will still be there when you're ready (as will the badge). So much to look forward to😊😊😊

[SunnyMummy Graduate]

Aww thank you for that McFitty!

[Irish-John Graduate]

I'm not sure how long it took you to start running - I was 56 last year and had never run in my life. I was so eager to get through the programme I pushed hard without realising before finding this Forum that I was risking ruining my running altogether by injuring myself.

I have had times when I can't run either, as you are now. And I do feel restless, irritable and discontented. But I also remember that just as it took me years to start running - I still have years in which I can do it. I might have to start off again at a lower level (actually just finished that process this morning because I could not run at all for first two weeks of June and only four or five runs since) and that is frustrating too. You start wondering if you will EVER get back to where you were!

And of course, slowly and steadily, you will get back to where you were and then, slowly and steadily, go 'onwards and upwards'.

Running like what we do it here - a 'Fast' sport for 'Patient' people

Wishing you a full and speedy recovery and also wishing you to be kind to yourself during recovery. You will then be back with us in good time and more importantly - in good shape to run with us all again

[SunnyMummy Graduate in reply to Irish-John]

Thank you Irish-John, yes I know you're right! ☺

[Rbecks Graduate]

Urgghh how frustrating for you, but you have to give yourself huge credit for what you have already achieved. I suffer with sore allergic eyes and always wear sunglasses in the summer even when running. Maybe worth a try? Good luck smashing that run and hope you feel loads better soon.

[SunnyMummy Graduate in reply to Rbecks]

Thank you. I think I've worn sunglasses on pretty much every run as it happens, as I find I am quite photosensitive now anyway & it helps prevent bug strike lol. I'm still not sure what's caused this. It sort of feels like I do have a virus now, but equally that could be an allergic reaction progressing. I am always happier outdoors though so just going to go for some normality today & will be going for a run as soon as I've dropped my threenager at nursery. I shall stick to my familiar route today then it doesn't matter so much if I can't see so well 😂