Tough going today. Woke from an unhappy dream, with sad memories and heartache.
My black dog, ( Same as Winston Churchill's) has not been around for quite a long time, but when he reappears...( the dog...not Churchill)... it always knocks me off my feet. Too much upset, too much sadness, and no solution, make it very difficult.
Feeling very unsettled, I decided not to go out, but supportive husband.. having listened, comforted and dried tears, said why not just head off and outrun the big dog...
So... what was there to lose.. at least it was dry! Reason to be cheerful Part 1?
Got togged up and decided to repeat a third Stepping Stone run. A different route this time, down the hill towards the railway and up into the lanes.
Probably because I had been upset, I took a while to get into my stride. My breathing was uneven and my legs felt like lead. Down towards the crossing and along into the village. The children had all disappeared into school by this time, hols over and a fair stretch until Half-term. The cottages, bereft now of their Christmas finery, bedroom curtains wide open and everyone back into the mundane routine of a January morning.
All a bit sad and dreary, I was missing the sparkle somehow...I needed to just get on with it.
My dog was still with me, and I found it hard to focus on brighter thoughts. So, I concentrated on Laura's tips for running; running taller and lighter, trying to master the more relaxed style of running. It started to feel easier and instead of forcing myself up the hill to Old Road, ( think the dog would have bitten me), I retraced my steps and turned by Rookery Wood. Pace increasing now, the rooks all up and about, wings clattering and bits of twigs falling from tower-block nests, high in the trees. Winter celandine peeping from soggy greenery... my black dog was slowly losing ground. Travelling up the hill, legs began to feel lighter and my breathing had steadied.
Trying to unclench my fists and relax my fingers...I headed up to the Bridle path, the corner of Old Road was completely flooded, so a wise choice not to head that way. Glancing over to the field I noticed the Winter Wheat has grown significantly... maybe trying to escape the sogginess of the earth, the spiky shoots stretching upwards to an overcast but rain free sky. My dog was still with me, but getting further and further behind me. Turning at the top of the hill by the Bridle Path, I headed back down to the station. The birch trees, their silvery trunks clad with a warm muffler of green ivy... the last mist hanging over the fields clearing slightly, with maybe a hint of a promise of a better day.
Downhill.. always a joy, but this time, trying to control my pace more, not just run faster because I can, and keep in time with the 1,2,3,4... the lady at the end cottage has left her old-fashioned bike, still, outside her front door, still filled with Christmas greenery and she had added Christmas roses.. beautiful.
New Year, new beginnings, new growth...! Forgetting that we finish on a high, I mis-timed my run and found the railway crossing barrier down... so... ten or more repeats up and down by the side of the wood.. past the bemused rooks and the equally bemused car drivers waiting to move. I smiled, in spite of myself, at the thought of the sight of this strange, grey clad lady running backwards and forwards under the oak trees.
Over the crossing now, back on to the main road and the walk-down home.. Took a slightly different way, the yellow roses are still in bud, the first snowdrops are out and the shoots on the daffodils are really evident...
Turned towards home, refreshed and revitalised. I suddenly realised that my dog had gone, I think I lost him by the station; he may be around the corner, but for now he has taken a different route.
Isn't running just amazing?