Feeling like a failure

[CrazyCat1973]

Attempted Week 5 run 3 for the first time today and feeling deflated.

I know I've been here before and spent weeks and weeks trying to get through Week 3 and managed it eventually but I repeated Week 5 run 2 five times before I even plucked up the courage to attempt the 20 minute run and I failed

I'm so frustrated with myself, my legs are wanting to continue but my lungs make me stop, I'm getting the 'post Pleurisy' pain again which I thought I had seen the back of. So gutted, I want to do this but I feel like the goal post has just been moved further away from me again.

[Hidden]

Oh crazy cat, you are NOT a failure. If you are getting lung pain do you need to take a trip to the doctors? Maybe they can give you the quick once over and give you some treatment / recommendations if necessary? I can't imagine running with painful lungs, it must be very tough for you. Take it easy and don't beat yourself up. This is meant to be enjoyed and build you up, not make you feel down. Take care. X

[CrazyCat1973 Graduate in reply to Hidden]

Thank you for your kind words Mimsickle.

I know what the pain is, it's due to a long history of lung problems, I have scarring on both sides of my lungs I thought I had got past the pain and was doing well but its just got me down today, I will pick myself up and keep trying x

[Hidden in reply to CrazyCat1973]

Oh that sounds really unpleasant for you. Take as much time as you need, go really slow and look after yourself. X

[gary_bart]

I've just looked up pleurisy on google, and it looks like quite an obstacle to get over. If you're not making it over this right away, that's not a failure, it's just a big obstacle you're up against. I don't know how you deal with it, but it sounds like something you need to watch (NHS mentions being careful if you start coughing blood etc - ow!) Maybe if it persists, you should see a doctor? Or do you already know all forms of this? (It gets like that; if you suffer something long enough, eventually there are aspects of it that you know much better than your doctor does).

Seeing as you're going to receive this advice, anyway (and you've probably heard it before?), I'll just put the word in for trying slowing down from slow here, and leave everyone else to amplify on the virtues of this. It might be a way to keep the feet moving the 20 minutes? And if you just treat c25k as a phase, done slowly, maybe you one day get to where you're hoping to get by just adding something to your slow phase later?

The only other Week 5 trick I have up my sleeve is to look for a way of doing it downhill, like I did mine. It works.

[CrazyCat1973 Graduate]

Thank you Gary.

The after effects of Pleurisy, allergies and long term asthma are a proper pain in the backside, according to the Dr's I have been left with extensive scarring to my lungs and the pain is down to the stretching as I breathe deeply, a couple of years ago I couldn't walk uphill for more than a minute or so without stopping.

As a result I currently only jog slowly on a treadmill (to avoid irritants, allergens and hills!)

I'm thinking I might keep repeating Week 5 run 2 and just slowly try to increase the jogging and decrease the walking to get me closer. I will get there .......eventually x

[gary_bart in reply to CrazyCat1973]

All right, so there is at least something positive in all this? You've come a very long way, even if it's a much tougher struggle for you than for someone who doesn't have to work around injured lungs. But gee, don't go feeling like a failure for not managing to do what few would even dare attempt. I suppose you know that, and it's just disappointing to feel like you'd done what you needed to get ready for the big jump, and plop, down it all falls, and back to square one you have to go all over again. (Or you have to go back there if you're you, anyway).

I have a cousin in Germany who I've tried to talk into running (because I've heard that in moderation it's very good for asthma - something that runs in our family), and he never gets round to it. I don't blame him. He knows how to manage the disease by now, but when he was young it nearly killed him several times, so anything that involves getting out of breath is frightening. His way of saying to hell with it is that he scuba dives. I think he's not meant to, but he wants to go and commune with those fish, whatever it takes, so he just takes his chances. But I know from what he's been through what a pain it can be, even when it's not being potentially lethal. Finally get a job, and the next day you're on the ventilator thing hoping not to end up in hospital, because there was too much dust there.

I hope your new strategy works for you. I suppose one thing you need to remember is that at least you get exercise out of it, regardless of how close of far you get to achieving your goal of the day. Certainly as long as it's not hurting it looks like it's helping quite a bit, so it's worth sticking to the mission like you are.

[CrazyCat1973 Graduate in reply to gary_bart]

Exercise in general is very good for asthmatics (especially as being overweight is a hindrance) and good on your cousin for the scuba diving, the thought of asthma and water scares the hell out of me!

I lost 2 friends in my childhood to normal, everyday asthma attacks and spent far too many hours as a child in A&E myself, most of my adult life it had been reasonably under control until I ended up with pleurisy which knocked me off my feet for months.

But I'm improving, since starting C25K my breathing is generally more under control and after my runs it returns to normal quicker, if I could just loose the pain it would be all good !!

[Glen53 Graduate]

You are doing brilliantly, please don't be deflated, though do take as long as you need to complete week 5 and the other weeks afterwards. I know a number of people who have a chronic lung problem and how frustrated they can get when they don't achieve or they get out of breath. Yes you can get there.........eventually

Take care

Glen

[JoolieB1 Graduate]

I found the best preparation for week 5, day 3 was a lot of rest the day before. When running, Have a slow, comfortable pace. Make sure your breathing is deep and slow - even on the warm up walk, breathe deliberately deeply to get the oxygen moving round. Have some phrases handy - I can do this, this is going on to the Forum page, wait til I tell my friends etc. maybe a little treat at the end for doing it - hot bath, lovely breakfast, pyjama day - whatever u like. Come on, you have prepared yourself to do this. Julie

[Purple_faced_woman Graduate]

If you get out there and keep trying you are never a failure. Please don't ever think that about yourself. Good luck with dealing with this problem. It sounds like you have a good plan, and I hope it goes well for you.

Keep running and let us all know how it goes.

[RunningForBroke Graduate]

You have already beat everyone who stayed on the couch. I see no failure there.

[smurf1303 Graduate]

I also have lung conditions and know how hard it is, but well done for what you've achieved so far. I'm sure your lungs are thanking you for what you are doing for them, not grouching that you haven't yet (but I'm sure will) run a bit further.

Keep at it, I'm sure you'll get there when you (and they) are ready.

[Helein Graduate]

Please don't call yourself or think of yourself as a failure as you are not one, far from it.