I had a super duper run this morning. Awoke at 8.30am which I was amazed at for a Saturday, then chucked some spinach, cucumber, beetroot, lemon, apple and ginger in the whizzy juicer thing. Swallowed said concoction and was out the door before you could say "Careful that lot don't go through you like a dose of salts!"
I had decided to jog lazily today - a 5K in around half an hour / 35 mins and I'd be happy. Wasn't going to do any of this sub 30 minute nonsense. No sir! This was gonna be a gentle Saturday morning jog.
I set off at around the same time that probably a million other people in the country were doing a Park Run and lollopped along until the first K was announced in my headphones - 6'05. I felt totally fine and jogged over the pedestrian flyover thingy at St Margarets. "Tum tee tum, dee do dee dooooo" I hummed to myself, thinking that even though it was raining, I was feeling ever so pleased I was out and "doing it baby!"
2K announcement @ 6'18. Slower than the first. "That's fine" I told myself. "Whatev's!". I wasn't going mad today, as I said, this was going to be a relaxed half hour jog to boost my fitness levels and to aid my diet I'm on, to lose a few pounds. As I was running K3, I ran past shop window - a huge mutha of a window and I took a cursory glance at my reflection thinking I was about to see this dynamic, athletic gazelle like creature, purring along with legs doing graceful, long strides. OH MY GOOD GOD! It was the EXACT OPPOSITE! I looked like a tomato faced, twisted, puffing, stiff legged, duck billed platypus!! My arms were doing this ridiculous sawing motion and my overall impression was "Bloody hell! I look ridiculous. What a crap running action!". Funny how you think you look like one thing and the reality is the opposite!!
I kept going at my relaxed pace and tried to get over the shock. Once K3 was announced @ 5'57 I was beginning to tire and wondered how I'd gone faster?? Should I stop for a walk? Trouble is when I do I find it hard to get going again, so I slowed right down for a bit and jog/walked until I felt I could speed up a bit. K4 = 5'54. "Whaaaaaat? I'm getting faster" I told myself. Then the announcement in my head said something that made me reeeally take notice - "Expected finish time 30'24 seconds".
I was pert with excitement. "Wow oh Wow oh WOW - this means that if I run the final 5th K in under 6 minutes, I COULD make this run a sub 30 minute one!!"
I know what I said earlier. I know this was gonna be a relaxed lazy jogette - but come on! I had a shot at completing a sub 30 (which always gives me a deep down satisfaction). I literally RAN - not jogged - RAN. I really had to make this count. I was going fast. Really fast. I kept it up for a good 2 minutes when suddenly a massive wave of nausea came over me. "Whoooo!!! Slow down Dan". I did as I was told. I slowed down to my lazy speed and waited until the feeling passed. It did, so I decided I would do a sprint finish. God knows where the energy came from but I picked up the pace and bloody well legged it!
The announcement - "You have reached your goal. 5K in 29'51". I stopped, put both arms in the air and shouted "Yesssss!!!". God knows what the passing cars thought as this red faced oaf fisted the air.
Aint this running lark fascinating? You go out one day and then do the same thing the next time and it's totally different. I had no plans for a fast run. It just happened.
I'm still horrified at the window reflection though. Won't do that again in a hurry!!
Happy running folks!