Tuesdays shoes arrived Sunday

[SueAppleRun]

I was most surprised when the postman banged on my door in the middle of Sunday morning with a pair of shoes that I wasn't expecting until Tuesday. So pair number one has arrived, Saucony Cohesion 15. Discounted and not the most expensive to start with, these I'm expecting to be my everyday or walking shoes.

I put them on, walked around in them, they didn't feel anything special, they are reviewed as not speed shoes, supportive and good for a medium distance plod along. Well I'm not a speed runner, I plod along so I'm hopeful we'll get on .

After a couple of hours of pottering round the flat, I've been putting all Willows music tracks on an external hard drive because I'm nearly ready to dismantle the music studio, he'd recorded so many tracks, a load of covers that I didn't realise he'd recorded and a track called Sola which completely undid me, so I decided I better go for a run and put myself back together again.

I chose NRC running on empty, with a Kim Wild album, goodness knows why, and off I walked down the road. This felt ok so I started to run, hmm silly little trippety troppety steps, nice and gentle, felt a bit strange but I wasn't in a hurry. Up and over the bridge, to the seafront and turned left, 2k run and another left turn towards the fire station where I cut through onto the industrial estate. The NRC run finishes so I walked a bit ran a bit, feeling slow and a bit silly, and all of a sudden! Out of the blue! The shoes suddenly felt as if they belonged on my feet! My stride lengthened a little and I relaxed into the run, back up over the bridge, uh oh! A whole family or two complete with grandmother's, pushchairs and walking toddlers were coming the other way, no way would I get past them, so I hopped off the curb, sprinted upwards to get past before a car came over the top and ran me down, we all exchanged greetings and I ran on. Down the other side, walk ran walk the rest of the way home.

5k run, slower than slow, with some walking, but I've arrived home feeling more ok than I went out. These shoes will be ok, no strange aches or pains but I doubt they'll be my number one runners.

Happy Sunday everyone 😁

[Yesletsgo Administrator Graduate10]

Nice shoes! It's weird how grief can just suddenly be set off when you're feeling ok, seems the run helped. Look after yourself.

[SueAppleRun Graduate10 60minGraduate in reply to Yesletsgo]

Thanks, the songs still hit me but it's good to have them. The run did help thanks

[Oldfloss Administrator Graduate10]

Happy run...from a sad but love filled memory.. Well done you...new shoes and they feel okay...

That sounds like a Sunday we'll spent!

Enjoy the rest of it !

[SueAppleRun Graduate10 60minGraduate in reply to Oldfloss]

Cottage pies also made to keep grandson fed, it fills my need to make things that I'm unlikely to eat, The shoes got better as the run went on. The songs, it's a bit indulgent of me but I like to hear them every so often, I'm not using the music studio so am going to pack it away into a walk in cupboard then if I need to I can set it all up again, if I don't then I'll sell it all off. It's taking time, but I seem to have time

[Oldfloss Administrator Graduate10 in reply to SueAppleRun]

That's a good plan! X

[Runninggirl59 60minGraduate]

Grief is like that, catches you when you off guard sometimes. At least you have running to help you get back on track. Like the shoes, I'm waiting till my achilles is fully recovered before buying new running shoes but new shoes ai am definitely having!! Glad you are in a better place after your run 🏃‍♀️

[SueAppleRun Graduate10 60minGraduate in reply to Runninggirl59]

Enjoy your new shoes when you get them, and thanks

[PeggySusi]

Excellent delivery service and they look very nice. I’m looking forward to getting my new Sauconys this week via Evri 🤞

Nothing I can say to help with the fog of grief which must be always with you now in the background.. you are doing well finding your own ways through it and keeping yourself together most of the time.. sending virtual hugs..🤗🤗

[SueAppleRun Graduate10 60minGraduate in reply to PeggySusi]

Thanks Sue, I'm ok a lot of the time, sorting out the music though is hard, but I don't want any of it lost, some is on Spotify, some is on other online places but some of it was just for us, and it feels wrong to let it go, he had a desktop computer which will go so I just wanted to make sure I'd got all the music and photos off.

[PeggySusi in reply to SueAppleRun]

The lovely thing is that you care so much for all the memories Willow left behind. I worked on probate cases for a few years.. the saddest ones I remember were those where a lifetime of beloved possessions, photos and memories went straight to the sale room and the tip, with nobody to care at all.

[SueAppleRun Graduate10 60minGraduate in reply to PeggySusi]

Yes, that's sad, I packed up a lot of things early on and gave to his children but always knew the music stuff was not for giving away to gather dust,

[Sandie1961 Graduate10 in reply to SueAppleRun]

Music is such a strong memory so can imagine how hard it must be when it was such a big part of Willow’s life. One day at a time my lovely friend xx

[Jools2020 Graduate10]

A much needed and successful run for you, Sue. Songs are such memory joggers, aren’t they.

Funny how those shoes got better as the run went on! Sounds like you have a plan for the music studio, too.

[SueAppleRun Graduate10 60minGraduate in reply to Jools2020]

Hearing him sing is exquisite but heartrending, it's easier than it was as for a few months I couldn't play them at all. It did seem as if the shoes were settling on my feet, I'll give them another short run tomorrow and see how they do.

How are you?

[Birdlady64 Graduate10]

Music can do that to you can't it? But how lovely he recorded a song in your name. Hopefully you can come to love it.Sounds like you and the new shoes are going to be good friends. And a good run for you as well - I hope it helped.

[SueAppleRun Graduate10 60minGraduate in reply to Birdlady64]

It was lovely to find, but he wrote a song for me when we first met and I have several different recordings of that one

[CBDB Graduate10]

Awwwwhhh … that must have been immensely emotional. And the run - I imagine - was a good way to hold and cope with the immensity of those emotions. Well done.

The shoes look great!

[SueAppleRun Graduate10 60minGraduate in reply to CBDB]

Thanks yes it was a bit tough but I'll play them again and it will be easier to hear him sing

[Doris8 Graduate10]

That’s good your shoes fit like a glove. What a lovely thing Willow did for you. Very touching. Something you can treasure.

[SueAppleRun Graduate10 60minGraduate in reply to Doris8]

Yes, I will one day,

[Annieapple Administrator]

🍏 A very emotive post.. feeling for you in that grief that arises out of the depth of great love.. So poignant that you could find some sort of solace in the run in those black beauties. What a treasure Willow has left you… 💜🎶🤗

Grief

[SueAppleRun Graduate10 60minGraduate in reply to Annieapple]

Most the time I'm ok now, just today has been tough thank you for that explanation,,

[Annieapple Administrator in reply to SueAppleRun]

💜🤗

[Oldgirlruns Graduate10]

What a lovely man he was to leave you a song Sue! A beautiful memory. The shoes look just the biz, even if you only use them for the odd plod - and we plodders need nice shoes too! A great surprise for you to have them delivered on a Sunday - I ordered something last week and despite the fact it’s only a tee shirt and ought to go through the letterbox, apparently the Post Office decided they couldn’t deliver it so I’ll have to hang around all day tomorrow waiting for them to bring it back! Grrr…! Enjoy your shoes!

[SueAppleRun Graduate10 60minGraduate in reply to Oldgirlruns]

Post office is weird, what a nuisance.

[Dexy5 Graduate10]

Whoop whoop 👟👟

How lovely that Willow wrote a song for you, that is so special. ❤️

[SueAppleRun Graduate10 60minGraduate in reply to Dexy5]

Makes it very hard to listen to now , but he was a very special person

[Mudita11 Graduate10]

A very moving post Sue. What a gift Willow has left for you.

Love the shoes. I’ve got a couple of pairs of Saucony now and they are my faves x

[SueAppleRun Graduate10 60minGraduate in reply to Mudita11]

Would be good if mine made me run as fast as you 😀 x

[RunBrianRun Graduate10]

I’m so glad your run helped you with the emotions of finding Willow’s song for you Sue. You’re getting two pairs of shoes, right? If so, that’sa very good idea. I have a couple of meh shoes that l now use for walking which is always a good option for her older or meh ones that you can’t or don’t send back.

Finally well done on yet another 5k. Fabulous!

[SueAppleRun Graduate10 60minGraduate in reply to RunBrianRun]

Thanks Brian.Shhh don't tell anyone, I ordered 3 pairs 🤣🤣🤣

After buying 2 new pairs of glasses I thought this month's spending was done but seemingly not.

I was pretty down in the dumps yesterday, but today is another day and the sun is shining 🌞

My old shoes that I was using for walking were smooth on the soles, so not really safe.

I love the expression , 'meh' shoes 😀

[Gthants 60minGraduate]

Beautiful to have the music. And stuff like that catches up with you. I have some of my big bro's tools and I sat and sobbed last time I used one of his screwdrivers. It just creeps up on you ...

Good run/walk - and pleased your new shoes are working out!

[SueAppleRun Graduate10 60minGraduate in reply to Gthants]

Thank you, I wish it wouldn't just creep up with me, I think I've come to terms with it and wallop, but getting out and about helps.I'm still on the fence about these shoes but I have another pair coming and then another 😂