Do you look at and 'speak' to you los... - Bereavement Care ...

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Do you look at and 'speak' to you lost loved one each day?

chloe40 profile image
chloe40Administrator
13 Replies

I find myself having little chats with my loved one everyday, sometimes I'm not even aware of it immediately. It could be a passing comment, a smile or even thinking if only.....

It helps.

Chloe

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chloe40
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13 Replies
Bingofox007 profile image
Bingofox007

in my head I do indeed. My husband loved world politics and was keen on following conflicts and traumas on the world. He cared deeply, not a morbid fascination. He loved the joys too. My daughter and I do frequently say ‘what would dad make of that?’ It’s been 11 years without him this July so lots of changes/wars/covid not to mention our daughters wedding, grandson and her divorce that would have broken his heart. So yes, I frequently talk to him. I have to. I couldn’t go on if I didn’t. Someone in your heart will never be gone. Take care 🦊x

chloe40 profile image
chloe40Administrator in reply to Bingofox007

Thank you Bingofox007

You brought a smile to my face this morning when you mentioned in your post the phrase ‘what would dad make of that’

It’s something I say often!

Take care too x

Turnipgirl profile image
Turnipgirl

The other day I was thinking that when my father died did he die full of regret over things he had done and wish he had never taken certain opportunities or did he die with regret over things he hadn't done wondering what might have been?

With myself I want to die full of regret over things I have done wishing I hadn't taken things than die with regret over things I hadn't done wondering what might have been?

Yesterday I had an interview in West Cardiff for 3 30pm and the traffic going out of the city up that way was horrendous but thankfully I arrived early and gave it my best shot!

My sister in law came with me and said to me I could have always have said no to the interview and I said how I would rather wish I hadn't gone to the interview than wish I had wondering what might have been!

It's a real trek going from east to west across the city and I went past some houses I had lost out on up west and was thankful I had as I don't think I would have been happy there!

Up here I am more than welcomed into the community!

chloe40 profile image
chloe40Administrator

Thank you Turnipgirl

Shame you had such a trip for your interview but you did it and well done for making the effort x

Turnipgirl profile image
Turnipgirl in reply to chloe40

If I don't get the job I went for last Friday I won't be heartbroken over it but still it was good to have made the effort rather than just saying no all because it was 3.30pm on a Friday which would have been silly!

Thankfully tomorrow its a 10am interview in Newport for a sales job which is nice as with 10am once you are done you are done for the day with no waiting around like with 3.30 appointments and 3pm ones like last weeks were!

Friday coming after signing on at the job centre we are going to Cardiff Bay to the food festival there which I am looking forward to!

chloe40 profile image
chloe40Administrator in reply to Turnipgirl

Yes, it was a difficult journey for you.

Good luck tomorrow x

Food festival sounds so good x

Turnipgirl profile image
Turnipgirl in reply to chloe40

Tomorrow after the interview it will be a day out in Newport which I am looking forward to!

Newport reminds me of Scunthorpe and Widnes in how its laid out and there's a nice greengrocers shop in the high street there as well!

It will be something nice to look forward to for Friday afternoon going down to the food festival after signing on at the job centre!

chloe40 profile image
chloe40Administrator in reply to Turnipgirl

Enjoy it, you deserve it!

x

Dalipup profile image
Dalipup

I talk to all of my deceased loved ones, but especially to my husband. In fact i began writing journals to him about ten days after he died because he was who i talked to about everything during our lives together and i had to find a place to put it all.. After four years i tend to simply verbally chat with him more than write, but so far i have nine journals and counting. I have begun to reread what i wrote in those journals and the raw pain i see in them makes my heart hurt but also shows me how far i have come in my grief when those days hit that feel like they will never get better.

chloe40 profile image
chloe40Administrator in reply to Dalipup

Thank you so much for a really helpful post Dalipup

I’m sure this will be helpful to many of our members x

Cpearl profile image
Cpearl in reply to Dalipup

Hi Dalipup,

I just posted about writing Letters to My Husband then started reading this feed, lol

It does help. I write sometimes several times a day. I only wish I had someone had mentioned this earlier on. But I needed a way to feel like there was some way still feel connected to him. He has been gone for 1 year now. Some days I feel a little better others not...

Caza profile image
Caza

no I don’t think I’ve ever spoken out loud to them. Not sure that it would help me. So pleased that it eases the pain for others even if it’s just a little bit. I do kiss my finger & put it on my daughter’s lips all be it on photos that I have of her. But some days even that’s too hard.

chloe40 profile image
chloe40Administrator in reply to Caza

I understand Caza it must be so very hard at times x

Very difficult for me at the moment.

x

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