my new normal

[lonely2001]

recently bereaved finding evenings lonely, cant concentrate on tv any more, I'm ok at sorting the practical stuff out but emotionally not great, just about manage working part time but also on meds for anxiety condition and feeling light headed most of the time, sleep not great.

[1tuppence]

However long ago you were bereaved, if it can be called "recently", then it's really early days. Loss of a loved one is big. Our whole being has to have time to process, "be with", come to accept the changes, grieve the losses, so many emotions including the loneliness. It's hard. I do know, and it will take the time it takes. There's no hurrying any of the process.

What can you do to help yourself? First of all, make sure you are eating, and eating nutritious food. Grief can affect hunger, it's easy when we're alone to think, "Oh, I'm not hungry", "I can't be bothered to cook for myself". I found it helped me to have something simple and easy to pop into the oven, such as a ready made small chicken pie. It cooked itself, and then I'd add some frozen peas. Peas are a very good source of protein ....I didn't know that until recently :-).

Can you find a creative way to set some of the grief loose? Could you write down on a piece of paper, just exactly how you feel? You needn't show anyone else, and if you don't censor it, the free words will simply appear on the page....and be expressed instead of held inside, hurting you.

I hope there is someone in your life who can give you a gentle hug. I am sending one to you.

[workinternet in reply to 1tuppence]

Ty youre so right ...im eating ok but living the grief nightmare ...its so raw ....ive lost my lover and my marriage has ended its all a shock now hes died

[Caza]

unfortunately that’s the way it goes. Dizziness light headiness unreal feelings whilst the world seems to be wizzing on around you. Unable to concentrate feeling very much on your with everyone else seem to be moving on. So very hard.

So well done on continuing to work & getting yourself to the doctors. Pat on the back. I find exercise helps me to sleep watching crappy films anything that helps. Maybe to early to join clubs, book craft etc….

Big hugs xx

[Sandradsn]

I'm sorry for your recent loss.Its good you can sort out practical things.I hope you are looking after yourself.I know in the early days its difficult to cope emotionally when everything is busy and going on around you.

Reading in bed enables me to sleep better and switch off.I try not to look at my phone whilst trying to get to sleep otherwise I'm awake half the night.!

[workinternet in reply to Sandradsn]

Long walks with my dog is helping . When a spouse dies crikey never known such alot of paperwork let alone the separate task of planning a funeral and wake ....all on top of the upset wow its big alright

[Sandradsn in reply to workinternet]

Focusing on getting through one day at a time is good.Have you a good friend to just be with?I'm glad you are spending time walking with your dog,its good to get outside and clear your head.

[GoGo_JoJo]

Just take each day as it comes, if TV isnt a helpful distraction just get an early night and perhaps put a radio on a timer, just enough noise to stop you dwelling on things but not really requiring your focus. If you drift in and out of sleep even better as even short bursts get banked as rest for your body and mind. 💖

[workinternet]

Im feeling the big void . Hubby died few weeks back im devasted and had loads to do ...gosh knows how i keep going tbh ...feel 4u x