What major changes have you had to make with your life, since your loss?

[chloe40]

Please share if you feel able.

Chloe <3

[KekEstacado]

I have to live with a lot of pain everyday, I have yo see myself in the mirror thinking that there's nothing I can do to change the fact that she's gone, it's really difficult but I'm trying everyday to continue

[chloe40 Administrator]

Hello KekEstacado

Welcome to our Community.

I'm so sorry for your loss.

The pain of grief is really difficult to cope with at times and for some unbearable, but we take one day at a time and I hope you will pop I hear anytime at all, we're hear to support you.

Chloe

[Zippy09]

Hi Everyone

I lost my Mum and dog this year. I went to Church as I was invited to go as they were giving a Bereavement Service to everyone who had suffered a loss. I'm not religious but I needed to go as my Mums name would be called out and you would then light a candle for her and they had made this lovely well out of fabric with water in it for each and everyone's teardrops - then you would drop these lovely coloured stones in the well. Fantastic idea!!

Anyway afterwards as I was reflecting - behind me this lady put her hand on my shoulder and said my Mum's name and asked was she a librarian as I know her and used to work with her - it was such a comfort knowing somebody knew my Mum and said what a lovely lady she was. I shall be going again for the Xmas Carol Service.

[Zippy09 in reply to Zippy09]

Also the loss of my dog was gone straight after my Mum's funeral. It was so hard and so much pain!! I dealt with it all by myself so had nobody really to lean on apart from my Cousin who was supportive at the time.

I have now joined this site called Borrow my Doggie and have met a few dogs to walk and that in turn has also given me some comfort.

[chloe40 Administrator in reply to Zippy09]

I'm so pleased that you have found a way to find comfort by walking dogs, such good ideas. Is this in the UK Zippy09 ?

Chloe x

[Zippy09 in reply to chloe40]

Yes Chloe it's in the UK you pay a minimum subscription for the year and do a profile of yourself and then people respond to you to see if your suitable in looking after and walking their dog!! xxx

[chloe40 Administrator in reply to Zippy09]

Thank you Zippy09

I'll make a not of this!

Chloe x

[chloe40 Administrator in reply to Zippy09]

Hi Zippy09

What an absolutely wonderful idea! so beautiful x

Chloe

[Greyone]

I never thought of changes until this year. I was so wrapped up in ... err recovering from / coping-with / living-with loss.

I was 54 when I lost Mum, a year later I lost my job and then I realised I was 55. That was when I realised a major change was afoot. Then two other events happened. A letter saying my pension was moving to calmer waters and an invitation to bowel cancer screening. This is when I realise I am getting old.

Now I am closer to dry land on the other side and realising that I still have to cope with three of the four changes.

Apart from coping with the emotional side I have yet to make any changes because of other family matters. I should have become a homeowner with my independence and a different perspective on life. That could have a happened maybe 30 years ago. Fortunately, 50-year-old children at hope are becoming more common. It makes me feel like a grown-up in a child's situation.

[chloe40 Administrator in reply to Greyone]

That's a lot of changes to get used to Greyone but I'm so pleased you've come through one hoop and wish you well with the others.

Chloe x

[NeuronerdDoaty]

My father passed. I’m going to have to figure out what to do with a mother who treats me poorly. I’m going to have to scrape together money to buy his truck. I’m going to have to be the strong voice in my family. My brother is horrible. He invalidates me the same way my mother does. I have to show my kids how to do this. I’m not sure I make sense.

Doaty

[chloe40 Administrator]

You do make sense Doaty NeuronerdDoaty

You have so many things to organise and sift through, try and prioritise things that need to be done very soon otherwise leave the rest until later when you can think clearly, otherwise you may make decisions you later wish you hadn't, like myself.

Take care

Chloe x