I lost my mum February 2016 after a long long battle with Dementia. My mum was my world, I idolised her, but I feel that was not really reciprocated by the way she was me. I always felt the big disappointment because I was not the daughter she felt she deserved and desired. Fourteen months on and I feel I am now losing my dad. He was the same with all of us. He is currently in hospital after deciding that life was not living and decided to stop his medication, stop eating and drinking. He finally asked for help on Sunday and was rushed into hospital, but there is a big problem with his kidneys and he does not seem to be responding to treatment. I am a carer for my younger sister Jen, who has Down Syndrome and although I have a wonderful family and fabulous husband, I feel so alone. I can't seem to get to grips with grief and I would never imagine in my wildest dreams, that it would run so deep. I admire my sister and how she copes. Every morning she will say "Is mummy alright?" and every morning, I will say "Mum is happy and watching you, she is up there in heaven" - she then smiles and says "That's nice, mummy is beautiful" - then she just gets on with her day, I so wish I could feel that way and I admire the way she copes. Now I fear, I am losing our dad. How will my little sister cope?
Ironically, my dear mum would always say "If something bad is going to happen, it will be on a Wednesday!" She died on a Wednesday and now a new Wednesday is upon us, are we going to get the news we have been dreading, or is it going to be worse. I hope not
Take care everyone and God bless <3