Feeling lost

I dont know if anyone remembers me, i joined in November last year, have not been on for a few weeks.

I had to have my dog put to sleep the other day, been feeling like iv lost a child ever since. She lost her fight with old age, and died peacefully, even tho it was devastating for me.

I know im grieving, how long will i feel like this. The slightest thing is upsetting me, if i open my freezer and there is chicken in there, i start crying because she used to look forward to having some chicken when it was cooked. I know people will think, omg it ws only a dog, get over it, and i do feel slightly embarrassed typing this, but i miss her so much, i feel as if iv lost a child, and i cant stop crying. im so sad. :(

23 Replies

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  • Lin, hun, it isn't "only a dog" - a much loved pet is a friend, a companion, a sharer of our joys, a comfort in our sorrows. They make us laugh, they make us cry, sometimes they makes us scream, when they've just munched their way through a new pair of shoes, but they are part of our lives - a very important part of our emotional lives. PLEASE don't feel embarrassed, many many people feel as you do, it's natural, it's understandable and it's nothing to feel ashamed about.

    The Blue Cross offer advice and support on pet loss, take a look at their website - even if you don't feel the need to talk to them, at least it might help you to know that you are not the only person who feels like this. I had a friend who kept her very very sick old dog alive long after I thought it was kind or responsible, because SHE couldn't bear the thought of being without him! Your dog died peacefully, she's beyond pain and suffering, and she was obviously much loved - and I am convinced that love never dies- never!!!!

    Try the Blue Cross, hun, and keep posting on here if it helps, I'm sure other people will have been through the same experience and WILL understand!

    Love and hugs

    Rose

    xxxxxxxx

    bluecross.org.uk/1742/pet-l...

  • I'm so sorry for your loss. My thoughts are with you. X

  • I know how you feel its so upsetting, folks for are not doggie minded can't always understand. My dog is not easy right now, when I leave him he crys and is sick, so I have to take him with me and that can be restricitng. As an older person I'm often so lonely and that when the anxiety kicks in, there's a limit to watching TV. I try to plan outings but the anxiety makes that more of a chore. Walking the dog is good exercise and does help the anxiety so do think about having another dog if you can. My thoughts are with you from Helen .

  • I understand fully.

    I lost my dog to cancer in March 2011 and I've never felt so much pain and grief (plus, of course, the good old health anxiety came on like a ton of bricks). I'd come home each day and burst into tears as no friend came to greet me.

    In the October I got a puppy, and although he'll never replace my first dog, he's a joy and makes me laugh every day.

    I still miss my old dog dreadfully but time does heal.

  • Crying when reading all these ,more so "no friend. Comes to greet me" Pets bring a lot of joy to us and grief when we lose them.

  • I wrote this poem years ago, think it says it all.

    Bill and Ben

    Together they pace the municipal park,

    Alike in age and gait,

    Grey head matched to grey muzzle.

    One views the tangled beauty of a rose,

    Comparing it to his well-tended plot;

    The other sniffs around a tree, reading the news.

    A bitch on heat would once have sent him,

    Ecstatic, in pursuit - now, he yawns,

    Shakes his ears, and - if dogs can - remembers!

    "Home, boy! Home, Ben!" The summons -

    Twice repeated, his hearing dulled - brings him back,

    As homeward they go, through familiar, waking streets,

    Old Bill and his Ben,

    To breakfast in companionate solitude.

    But should one die, the other,

    Would sink at last,

    And howl to the heavens -

    As for a lost love!

    Copyright TS

  • That's beautiful Briar Rose!!

  • Thanks, hun, it's one of my favourites! :) xxx

  • Wow Briar Rose, thats awesome!

  • Thanks, hun, I like it! ;) xxxxxx

  • Its truly a sensuous delight! :) xxx

  • Hi lin, it is not silly at all that you are grieving for your lost dog.We lost our little Border terrier just over a year ago and we still miss him.He was 9 when he died and ran into the bird feeder pole in the darkness,the vet said he had suffered severe spinal injury and that the kindest thing was to let him go.I stood and sobbed while he slipped away and I'm a 6ft 3" bloke so please don't feel embarrassed.The pain WILL get better and you will remember the happy times.Here's one poem I wrote for him...

    When Silence Hurts

    There is a kind of silence,

    that answers a knock at the door,

    and condemns a lonely garden,

    to lay empty for evermore.

    It is a kind of silence,

    that weighs heavy in the heart,

    a silence that curls on my lap,

    but was forced by fate to depart.

    This aching kind of silence,

    that still greets me at the door,

    is a silence that brings the tears,

    to come flowing again once more.

    March 2012

  • Oh Robbie, that's lovely!!!! xxxx

  • Aw thank you Briar,you're very kind

  • Ah hun it must be so hard for you i have dogs labradors and i love them to bits especially my choc boy hirsty he great so boystrous tho dont know what i would do if anything happens to him and you will miss her they are part of your family and best friend who you know you can tell anything to and they wont blab a word i know its hard but you have give your dog such a good life and just think about the good life you have had together and when she went her thoughts would have been of you her companion it will get easier and then you will be able to smile and remember the good times i have 5 gorgous new little friends at the mo 5 chocolate labs who are keeping me occupied so naughty but yet so funny remember hun think of the good times xxxxx

  • Wow sheffieldwed,you must be busy with all those!! We have a black lab now and another border terrier.They are the best of pals and curl up to sleep together.

    I see you're a fan of the Owls then? :-)

  • Lin, I lost my German shepard over year go, he was six and it whole family long time and now still quite raw. i hope you feel better soon and one day that time is best policy.

  • Hello Lin

    I had two German Shepherds who were 12 and 13 years old when they died i thought my whole world had ended. I use to still buy the food forgetting myself and ended up crying on a daily basis.

    When it snow's i revert back to when i was in the forest and how the dogs were jumping around rolling in the snow this makes me sad, but then i am happy to think they had a wonderful life and a family that loved them just like they were children.

    I have since bought another dog that would never replace the ones i have lost but it did help tremendously to distract my thoughts and feelings of the ones i lost.

    Time heals and if you are a dog lover it hurts even more.

    I really hope you can just smile to yourself and remember all the good times you had with your dog.

    Take care hun

    Hugs

    Seyi

  • I saw a lovely story on a programme about Battersea Dog's Home years ago. This guy had come in to have his dog rehomed; he didn't want to, but his wife had lost her job, they had kids, they were really struggling financially, and just didn't feel they could afford to feed him - the bloke was absolutely gutted!

    The very next day, he was back to collect his old friend. He said "None of us slept all night - the wife was in tears, the kids were in tears, i was in tears - dunno how we'll do it, but we'll manage - we CAN'T be without him, he's family!"

    :-D xxxxxx

  • That says it all Briar

  • I completely and utterly understand where you are coming from. Xxxxx.

  • hi filly. im so sorry for your loss, i lost one of my cats last october, it was like losing a child, i cried for weeks, i would think i was ok and then the tears would come again. he was only 5, i chatted on a forum called the rainbow bridge and it realy helped me. i hope you find peace soon, remember all the good times xxx god bless

  • Please don't feel silly. I lost my beautiful lady Alsation on 29 August 2001 ( and still counting). I was a publican at the time and many of my customers sent me bereavement/ sympathy cards. Although I had had dogs for nearly forty years and had loved them all equally, I lost Kiri at a time when everything else was going wrong in my life and I was just devasted. For months I kept breaking down and I thought that I would never get over her passing. After seven months- the longest I've ever been without a dog- I obtained an alsation/retriever cross named Teddy, who is now thirteen and not very well at the moment with arthritis, so I am facing the future with some trepidation. I still get choked-up whenever I think of Kiri and she will always be in my heart.

    I really feel for you and know exactly what you are going through; time does soften the edges, although it may seem to take an eternity. Please be assured that your friends on here are all with you.

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