Just sharing thoughts/venting

[Dnel82]

I usually like to mention at the beginning of my posts that I come back to visit here from time to time. My post are always long.

Maybe once or twice I'll take a glance to see what the community is doing, but most times it's because I'm doing some struggling myself. I stay away because sometimes the posts I read here resonates negatively with me and causes triggers.

It sucks to see so many struggling. Makes me wonder if there's enough awareness or researching being done for anxiety and panic. Is there???

Well anyway. About a week and a half ago I experienced a moderate panic attack. I gauge my attacks from mini, moderate to full blown. Mini are the ones I can brush off moderate are the ones that shake me up a little and it takes me a few days to weeks to feel halfway decent and full blown are the ones that send me to the emergency room which I've only experienced twice and this was in the very very beginning.

So this moderate attack shook me up pretty good. Happened out of nowhere. Since then my panic alarm has been on high alert. I kid you not that for the past 10 days I've been really struggling and this anxiety and panic has really been kicking my ass. I don't take meds BTW.

I been having the pounding heart and shakes in the morning, the struggling to be comfortable/ relaxed right before going to bed. I haven't been able to fully sit comfortably with the thought of having a panic attack which has been triggering mini attacks. I feel like I'm about to loose my mind. I feel like this is going to just take my life. Not sure how much strain and stress the human heart can take.

To sum it up I've been F'ed-up. Not sure how much longer it's gonna be before shake this off. Not really posting to look for answers or advice. There's nothing much anyone can do for me. I'm just sharing. There's over 7.9 billion people on earth. I believe there has to be one person out there who figured this out.